re: Public Humiliation

I think there is nothing wrong with it, unless the child has a true issue.
The detention I would do because if the child wanted to break the rules and think they are cool then.. They deserve it. Or if the kid who is failing math is just goofing off/not doing homework ect.. They deserve it too.
To me those are all public things, teachers and other kids no about the detentions and grades so.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Destinite:</b>" I don't agree with it at all. I think it is a form of bullying."</blockquote>




 

I really think it depends on the child and the situation. If my kids were caught bullying well I might make them go stand on the corner with a sign that says they bully. However if they were stealing I would take a different approach and probably start taking the things they like from their rooms and telling them I had no idea what happened to it. But the punishment needs to fit the crime as well as the child's personality since some are more sensitive than others.

The dad shooting his daughters laptop for what ever she put on facebook? That was stupid and ok got rid of the computer but it could have been handled in a different manner other than destroying the laptop.


EDIT: Of course I would only do those as a last resort and not my first choice of punishment. Talking and other forms need to be taken first to figure out why the kid is doing those things.

Depends on the personality of the kid. I mean... if the kid is a teen and royally smurfing up and only seems to care about their friends, then if nothing else works.... maybe that will. Also depends on what the kid did ya know? My daughter and I have that type of relationship though, she tags me in smurf to embarrass me as well. lol

Quoting Jenna+1:" I think there is nothing wrong with it, unless the child has a true issue. The detention I would do ... [snip!] ... ect.. They deserve it too. To me those are all public things, teachers and other kids no about the detentions and grades so."

 

IMO if discipline at home privately isn't working and you have to resort to public humiliation then you need to address why that isn't working before you go to the extremes.
My mom used to put me on time out or take away privileges like weekly treats, I used to hate seeing my brother have some sweets knowing that I couldn't have any because I was naughty. If it was something really serious idk I guess i would have to be in that situation before I had a proper solid opinion, I just don't like the whole 'public' humiliation thing, I was bullied in school in front of everyone and I felt so smurfing smurf, it definitely affected my confidence and self-worth. I know that's a bit different but the feelings would be the same and it's just too bold a thing to do for me, I don't think I would have the guts to do it lol.

I don't think it's okay when the kid is little or if they have mental issues going on, but I don't think it's wrong if a parent wants to make their 12 year old hold a sign saying they stole something. If the kid doesn't think stealing is wrong then they have no reason to be embarrassed. Obviously they SHOULD be humiliated if they're going to do things that can get them arrested.
Personally I think I would take a different approach. Like using stealing as an example, I would make my kid go volunteer at a homeless shelter and show them that they need to appreciate what they have because they have much more than a lot of people do. If it's grades and I KNOW they're trying I'll get them help/a tutor whatever. If I know they're smurfing around not doing what they need to do then I'll take away all their privileges until their grades come up.

Quoting Love = Moco and Bubba:" I really think it depends on the child and the situation. If my kids were caught bullying well I might ... [snip!] ... my first choice of punishment. Talking and other forms need to be taken first to figure out why the kid is doing those things. "

I thought that dad was hilarious

Quoting Tarynosaurus Rex:" I don't think it's okay when the kid is little or if they have mental issues going on, but I don't think ... [snip!] ... know they're smurfing around not doing what they need to do then I'll take away all their privileges until their grades come up."

I agree

<blockquote><b>Quoting Tarynosaurus Rex:</b>" I don't think it's okay when the kid is little or if they have mental issues going on, but I don't think ... [snip!] ... know they're smurfing around not doing what they need to do then I'll take away all their privileges until their grades come up."</blockquote>




I think taking whatever they stole back to the store and apologising is often humiliation enough.

Quoting Sofia's Mummy♥:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Tarynosaurus Rex:</b>" I don't think it's okay when the kid ... [snip!] ... up."</blockquote> I think taking whatever they stole back to the store and apologising is often humiliation enough."

Sometimes... but it really depends on the kid. Some couldnt give a smurf and need further punishment

Quoting Sofia's Mummy♥:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Tarynosaurus Rex:</b>" I don't think it's okay when the kid ... [snip!] ... up."</blockquote> I think taking whatever they stole back to the store and apologising is often humiliation enough."

It wasn't for any of the kids I know who shoplifted. It's far more humiliating when *everyone* knows what you did. And that's the thing, if you get caught and go to jail then EVERYONE is going to know. That's the consequences of being stupid.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Man. Bear. Pig.:</b>" Sometimes... but it really depends on the kid. Some couldnt give a smurf and need further punishment"</blockquote>




This is true. In which case I think the deeper issues of why they're acting out so much needs to be looked at and addressed. I think if it were me, having my parents humiliate me would have turned me against them even more.

I had a friend make her three boys stand on the side of the road with a sign that said things like, "Honk if you think I shouldn't lie to my mother" Well, she said she was, I'm not sure if she ever followed through.