Forums > TTC and Adoptionby: b e t h a n y

What no one told you about TTC **long... but worth the read

posted 29th Nov
What Nobody Told You About Trying to Conceive...
That unprotected sex doesn't necessarily lead to pregnancy.
That your sex life would start to resemble a science experiment.
That you would see your OBGYN/RE more often than your DH at O time.
That the longer you TTC, the more PG women spring up around you.
That deep down inside, I can be a very jealous person.
That one day you wouldn't mind checking your CM or CP to see if it is your fertile period.
That I should have gone to medical school like my mom wanted, because I've had to do so much medical research by now just to figure out what was wrong with me, I might as well be an M.D.
That I would know more about the female reproductive system and menstrual cycle than most of the doctors I go to.
That living your life in 2 week increments would be the norm
That you never knew how much you wanted to see those 2 pink lines......until only one shows up every month
That simply relaxing will NOT get you pregnant. (your dh has to do some work too)
That you have no control over some of the goals you set...
That wishing really hard for something doesn't make it happen, and staring at your chart doesn't make it change!
That one day my DH would know so much about how my uterus functions and what it looks like from the inside (thanks HSGs).
That a pregnancy doesn't always equal a baby.
That miscarriage is so common.
That I would wish we had started TTC earlier.
That my friends' pregnancies would start to make me sad instead of happy.
That I wasted ALOT of money on Birth control pills!!
That it would help bring a group of wonderful, caring, funny, empathetic women together like this.
That I would EVER be willing to stick a little blue pill up my hoo-haa (estrace pill...done vaginally),
That I'd EVER be willing to stab myself in the stomach or @ss every day in the hopes that it will help get me PG.
That it wouldn't happen the first time you didn't use birth control like we were led to believe in school.
That you wouldn't know how important a baby was to you until it took so long and you realized what you were willing to go through to make it happen.
That family would act like getting pregnant was a competition between all the young couples in the family, and the first one to get pg "wins".
That my DH is the most wonderful and caring man!
That it is insensitive to ask people when they are having a baby!
Tat women who do get pregnant are so very blessed!
That I could have been rich saving money on condoms, which were obviously unecessary.
That I would be happy to see abundant cervial fluid and tell my DH about it.
That other people's "good news" of pregnancy makes me sad and when they tell me they have good news, I hope that they just saved a bunch of money on car insurance by switching to Geico.
That medicine and procedures are not a sure fire way to get pregnant but it is a sure fire way to lose money fast.
That had I bought stock in Clearblue Easy I'd have my mansion on St. Pete's Beach in FL by now.
That docs should prescribe Zoloft with Clomid.
That having flo show up makes you cry, no matter who's bathroom you are in.
That it does not get easier, each cycle is harder than the last.
Feeling like you wish your life away in 2 week increments.
That I wouldn't want to hold or see someone's baby because it just hurts way too much.
That a group of "strangers" who I will probably never meet, have now become my "best friends" when it comes to ttc.
That I would splash urine on my face while taking apart an hpt in the hopes there really was a 2nd pink line hiding in it.
That talking about sex with fellow TTCers would be so easy.
That infertility is more common than you think.
That DH would get used to doing his 'thing' in a jar.
That one day all of this will make us stronger.
That there is sometimes darkness (infertility) before the light (a baby).
That no one I know (in my non FF life) would have any understanding as to how I feel.
That my temper and patience are much shorter than I ever thought.

That infertility is not as rare as I was led to believe.

That I would find it extremely difficult to be happy for other people's pregnancies and I would burst into tears upon hearing their news.

That my faith in God would be tested heavily.

That I would make so many new, wonderful friends who totally get how I feel because we all suffer from the same affliction of infertility.

That it could hurt so much to lose your innocence.

That I am very bitter towards unmarried accidental pgcys, and slightly bitter towards married accidental pgcys
.
That there is nothing to aid conception in the water at work, despite what some may say.

That I am so glad my neice was born when she was, early in our ttc, because if she were born now I don't think I could deal with it.

That someone I thought to be my best friend would hurt me by saying that she was sick of hearing about my efforts at ttc.

That I'd discover who my true friends are, both IRL and online.

That I'd ever be able to bond with my step-sister (also infertile).

That I'd be glad to know that I have PCOS - because at least I know what's wrong.
quote
I have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Tennessee
posted 29th Nov
This is so beautiful it made me tear up. I agree 100% except about splashing urine on my face lol and I dont have pcos. My very best friends have came from this site and were/are in the TTC Thread Im currently in. Hugs to you mama for posting this. Its so very true. Sometimes I feel no one understands my stfuggles
quote
I'm due August 29th (a girl), have 1 child & 1 angel baby & live in Florida
posted 29th Nov
Quoting katxo:" This is so beautiful it made me tear up. I agree 100% except about splashing urine on my face lol and ... [snip!] ... Thread Im currently in. Hugs to you mama for posting this. Its so very true. Sometimes I feel no one understands my stfuggles"

We started TTC in May'12 got pg right off, ended up in a mc-tubal. Got pg again after my D&C, it ended up as a mc also. I was one of those people that thought a mc would never happen to me. I am still trying to get over it, but I know everything happens for a reason. With sypmtoms I have been having here lately, I believe I have pcoc. I'm making me a doc appt tomorrow. And you're very welcome! Good luck to you as well mama.  
quote
I have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Tennessee
posted 29th Nov
Ugh, I know what you mean. We are coming up on our 3 year mark TTCing #2 (also, wtf I have an almost 4 year old). Its getting old, I really want to just give up but we can't afford adoption at this point in our lives  
quote
I'm due November 11th, have 1 child & live in Beaverton, Oregon
posted 29th Nov
Quoting Emilia's Mumum *JJM*:" Ugh, I know what you mean. We are coming up on our 3 year mark TTCing #2 (also, wtf I have an almost ... [snip!] ... almost 4 year old). Its getting old, I really want to just give up but we can't afford adoption at this point in our lives  "

*HUGS* Don't give up mama
quote
I have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Tennessee
posted 29th Nov
While I was reading this I was thinking about you Kat and then I got to the end and saw that you have already posted on it. I can relate to just about every single one of these things. It truly is amazing just how difficult ttc can be and what a toll it can take on every part of your life. I honestly don't know what I would do without you girls on here. I love all of my friends IRL but none of them are going through what I am. Everyone around me is pregnant or just had a baby and none of them were planned married or unmarried. I just feel like I've done something wrong and I'm being punished for it. I'm really glad that you posted this and I wish all the best for you!
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I'm TTC since November '11, have 1 child & 1 angel baby & live in Houston, Texas
posted 29th Nov
Aw..love this..

I am so glad I'm not the only one who splashes pee on my face, when taking apart the test  
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I'm due October 28th (it's a surprise), have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Maryland
posted 29th Nov
I love this.

I can relate to all of it. I am bitter.


I want to add that infertility affects men as well   and it's not any easier.


Good luck to you mama! Best wishes!
quote
I'm due December 9th, have 1 angel baby & live in Massachusetts
posted 29th Nov
Lots of luck to all you ladies too! It gets frustrating and seems like everyone I know is pregnant. :/ It makes me upset, especially if it was an "accident".
quote
I have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in Tennessee
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