re: d e l e t e d

Quoting ~~My Pet Wussy~~:" Can you get her a trunk or something that locks?"

she doesnt have a trunk with a lock but she has a cabinet in the closet where she can put her stuff at but she rather have it all over the room,

Why is your SIL there? Does she have anywhere else she can stay?
She probably needs space. She's at an age where she probably doesn't want to be around a 2 year old all the time.

Quoting -A-:" she doesnt have a trunk with a lock but she has a cabinet in the closet where she can put her stuff at but she rather have it all over the room,"

I would tell her that its still your DD's room ( I am guessing its your DD's room ) and if she doesn't want her stuff to be messed with then SHE needs to put it up.

Quoting ♥ darah ♥:" Why is your SIL there? Does she have anywhere else she can stay? She probably needs space. She's at an age where she probably doesn't want to be around a 2 year old all the time."

Tough, tough. Its OP's DD room and if OP's SIL doesn't want her stuff messed with SHE needs to put it up, its tough tough if she doesn't want to be around a 2 yr old......smurf the 2 yr old probally doesn't want to be around a bossy-impatient 12 yr old, lol

We have custody of my 13 year old sister and DD is about to be 2. My sister never gets on to DD like that. If my sister see's DD doing something she isn't supposed to, she'll tell her no and then just tell me and I'll handle the situation. DD does go into her room and try to mess with her stuff sometimes, but they do have their own rooms so it's not a constant issue or anything and my sister knows to keep important smurf up and out of the way or DD will end up getting it. Like a previous post said, get her a trunk or something to put her things in because she does need her own space and privacy at that age and have a talk with her about getting on to your DD. Let her know that if she sees your DD doing something she shouldn't take it into her own hands, she is to just let you know. And tell her that if she does get on to her again you'll take away any of the privileges she may have u for a while...all kids that age hate having the fun stuff taken away so if she does it anymore and you do have to take them away, maybe she'll really see that you mean business.

I don't see what's so wrong about telling your DD no or putting her in time out for touching stuff she's not suppose to be touching.

Maybe have your SIL just come tell you when she's getting into stuff. I can see it being annoying, I had a younger sister who was always in my stuff.

Quoting ♥ darah ♥:" Why is your SIL there? Does she have anywhere else she can stay? She probably needs space. She's at an age where she probably doesn't want to be around a 2 year old all the time."

as of right now no the reason she is here is cause her mom lost her job and has no money to support the both of them. i understand her not wanting to be around DD all the time but what else can i do, we live in a 2bd house cant just up and move cause of her.

ur sil definetly shouldnt hit ur kid and its probly not a good idea for her to punish her either in any way shes to young to know how to properly pusnish a 2 yr old or any one else shes 12 id tell her not to its not nice u dont want the 2 yr old to start hitting to and if 2yr old is bothing 12 yr old tell 12 yr old to let u know so u can handle the situation plus 12 yr olds dont always tell the whole truth u may want to put ur 2 yr olds toys in a different room so it wont be a issue im sure u can figure something out that will work or have 12 yr old move her things up so 2 yr old cant reach her things

Quoting Kyliesaurus♥Roaaaar:" I don't see what's so wrong about telling your DD no or putting her in time out for touching stuff she's ... [snip!] ... come tell you when she's getting into stuff. I can see it being annoying, I had a younger sister who was always in my stuff."

Yeah OP needs to tell her DD no and do time out, which I'm sure she does but her SIL can learn to put her stuff up too.

<blockquote><b>Quoting -A-:</b>" as of right now no the reason she is here is cause her mom lost her job and has no money to support ... [snip!] ... not wanting to be around DD all the time but what else can i do, we live in a 2bd house cant just up and move cause of her. "</blockquote>




Has anyone talked with your sil? Maybe her stuff us the only thing she feels she has control of. Heck, if you're really in HI and she's from Tx and doesn't have her mom around and is living in a house where she knows its not her home se can not be doing all to well emotionally

Quoting MyPurrrtyBabies:" Yeah OP needs to tell her DD no and do time out, which I'm sure she does but her SIL can learn to put her stuff up too."

Yes SIL should pick up and put stuff up high that's important, but you have to teach toddlers that they can't touch everything and anything also.

Quoting Kyliesaurus♥Roaaaar:" Yes SIL should pick up and put stuff up high that's important, but you have to teach toddlers that they can't touch everything and anything also."

  I agree.

but I think OP said her sil has cabinets to put her stuff in but doesn't.

Quoting MyPurrrtyBabies:"   I agree. but I think OP said her sil has cabinets to put her stuff in but doesn't."

yeah i read that.. and if something important gets ruined then that's SIL's fault.. She'll learn when her stuff gets ruined to put up stuff. She's 12, old enough to learn the hard way lol.

I just remember having a little sister who was in my stuff all the time, even stuff that was put up and it sucked lol

Quoting Buzz and Almond Joys momm:" <blockquote><b>Quoting -A-:</b>" as of right now no the reason she is here is cause ... [snip!] ... have her mom around and is living in a house where she knows its not her home se can not be doing all to well emotionally"

im really in hawaii and she realy moved from texas to here she has me her niece and her brother. Me and her have that relationship to talk about what ever and her brother did make DD room to fit her stuff in we dont treat her like shes a guest but has she lives here also. its just that she was always the baby back home intill DD came in and now its i can punish DD shes my kid but her im not her mom just her sister by law and when she does smurf i feel like i have to tell her mom or brother but even when they talk to her she still doesnt listen.

<blockquote><b>Quoting -A-:</b>" im really in hawaii and she realy moved from texas to here she has me her niece and her brother. Me ... [snip!] ... and when she does smurf i feel like i have to tell her mom or brother but even when they talk to her she still doesnt listen."</blockquote>




:-( this situation sucks for everyone.
Even though you welcomed her to your home- she knows its not her "home" I live with my inlaws and every single day I am very aware that I am not at home. It's a difdereent life. Different rules too. Not having her own space is going to be hard on everyone until she does- no way around it. What Probably needs to happen Is for her some say- say ya know you can't leave your stuff at this level. Dd will probably get into it, and if she does I will correct her but we is a baby. Ask her where she wants her stuff - in a reasonable area ya know. Like you don't like the shelf, what about you make your own bill board for stuff. What if we organize the closet for you. And then let her know that with this choice comes her responsibility of not leaving things around and getting mad. That there is no punishing aloud, that she must find you.
I think it's great you guys can talk ad with this relationship I think you could come to reasonable agreements


I know for me at tht age my anger came from the "special treatment" my half siblings got. I always felt that my feelings did not matter because te "babies" did not know any better. One thing my step mom never did was make me feel like my anger was justified.
And just a side note- maybe she needs some special time with you? You are her tempory mom even if she won't admit it.