I feel like I failed..

My daughter is 4 months old and we've slowly weaned from breastfeeding to breast milk in a bottle to formula only. I only EBF for a couple weeks, then started renting a hospital pump but at $80 a month, I can't afford it anymore. Not to mention my low supply problem. I can only pump 1/4 oz each session.. I've seen an LC multiple times and tried a bunch of things, nothing helped.. My daughter won't take the boobies anymore, only bottle, I'm sad.   I feel like I wasn't ready for this. I see all these people that EBF for a year easily or some who can pump 8-10oz one session.. I wanted to be like this. My body has failed me.. DH has been trying to comfort me but he would never understand how I feel about this.

Why did you even start pumping? And btw you can buy hand pump for like $20 anywhere and I've heard they work much bettter than electric pumps. I had a really nice Medela Swing and it didn't work for smurf.
Try getting a hand pump and just pumping constantly and take supplements to make more milk. You can relactate.

Aw, try not to be so hard on yourself. I went through the same thing with my oldest son. He never really latched so my milk never got established and it was so stressful bottle feeding him and pumping every 3 hours. I think that was a big part of my PPD so please try not to let it get you down - 4 months of breastmilk is great!

Quoting Supafly★:" Aw, try not to be so hard on yourself. I went through the same thing with my oldest son. He never really ... [snip!] ... 3 hours. I think that was a big part of my PPD so please try not to let it get you down - 4 months of breastmilk is great! "

Yeah, she never wanted to latch either. I had a very sleepy baby, like 18-20 hours a day sleepy. She never wanted to work for her food and my supply didn't come in until day 8. And I never got enough.. Shes really been getting formula from week 1 but not a lot.

Quoting Mama to A ♥:" Yeah, she never wanted to latch either. I had a very sleepy baby, like 18-20 hours a day sleepy. She ... [snip!] ... and my supply didn't come in until day 8. And I never got enough.. Shes really been getting formula from week 1 but not a lot. "

That's how my son was, too. He was preemie and slept for like, the first 3 months of his life. I started supplementing around 4 weeks and once I stopped getting an ounce from the pump I was like, to hell with this. He's perfectly healthy BTW. There are things you can do to increase supply, like taking fenugreek or drinking mother's milk tea if you want to give those a shot.

Quoting Will☮Creedence:" Why did you even start pumping? And btw you can buy hand pump for like $20 anywhere and I've heard they ... [snip!] ... work for smurf. Try getting a hand pump and just pumping constantly and take supplements to make more milk. You can relactate."

My LC is pretty sure I have IGT, so no amount of pumping is going to help me.. =/ My milk never really came in. I used a Medela hand pump and my supply started dropping so I rented a hospital grade double pump, and slowly it started dropping. I've tried the cookies, all the herbs, power pumping, varying pumping times/amount of pumping..

Very few people are able to breastfeed for a year or longer "easily". It takes a ton of work, and perseverance.
Better luck with your next, if you choose to have one. I suggest investing in a breastfeeding book, I recommend dr. Sears. And if you're still lacating even a little you can still get back to EBF if you want to.

Quoting Supafly★:" That's how my son was, too. He was preemie and slept for like, the first 3 months of his life. I started ... [snip!] ... things you can do to increase supply, like taking fenugreek or drinking mother's milk tea if you want to give those a shot. "

I did, I tried the tinctures which are supposed to be the best/fastest way, didn't help at all. The cookies, brewers yeast, oatmeal, power pumping, just everything people would tell me. I was pumping so much I just got burned out.

Quoting MommaSav2:" Very few people are able to breastfeed for a year or longer "easily". It takes a ton of work, and perseverance. ... [snip!] ... book, I recommend dr. Sears. And if you're still lacating even a little you can still get back to EBF if you want to."

This is true too. My 5 month old is EBF and it has been a long, tough road so far. He eats every hour and a half and gets up 6-8 times a night. It's exhausting and I can't say I've never broken down and given him a bottle. I used to give him a 4oz bottle every single night to get him to sleep but he doesn't need that anymore.

Quoting MommaSav2:" Very few people are able to breastfeed for a year or longer "easily". It takes a ton of work, and perseverance. ... [snip!] ... book, I recommend dr. Sears. And if you're still lacating even a little you can still get back to EBF if you want to."

I am still lactating, and I am working with my daughter. But anytime I try to even bring her to breast she will throw the biggest fit. Screaming crying kicking turning away. I have an SNS my LC gave me, but its so hard to try to get her calm enough to eat/insert the tubing. I've tried the nipple shields too. Medela and Tommee Tippee, she refused both. My biggest problem is one breast doesn't produce milk at all really. I know people can breastfeed on one side only, but I don't know how well that'll work.

Quoting MommaSav2:" Very few people are able to breastfeed for a year or longer "easily". It takes a ton of work, and perseverance. ... [snip!] ... book, I recommend dr. Sears. And if you're still lacating even a little you can still get back to EBF if you want to."

I just know DHs family all breastfed their babies from at least a year and they all say how easy it was and how much milk they had. (a couple of them did it for 5 years with multiple children!) Then there's me, who is struggling and trying my hardest but they don't understand.

This shouldn't be about what you *can* do. For whatever reason, it isn't working for you and it's OKAY! Stop feeling like a failure, even if you just didn't want to it would still be OKAY! Don't let people and their over zealous need and all the pressure in the world make you feel bad. You are a mom, a wonderful mom, and you are doing what works for YOU and YOUR BABY! It is most important that both of you are comfortable, happy and healthy! And the baby will be perfectly healthy! Just focus on enjoying being a mom and let it roll off your back. This is the most precious time in your baby's life and in yours, ENJOY IT!

<blockquote><b>Quoting Supafly★:</b>" This is true too. My 5 month old is EBF and it has been a long, tough road so far. He eats every hour ... [snip!] ... given him a bottle. I used to give him a 4oz bottle every single night to get him to sleep but he doesn't need that anymore. "</blockquote>




Yup. My daughter never got formula but we hard a time of it in the beginning. She had a terrible shallow latch that we just could not correct, so for the first 3 months every single session was painfandante I would bleed. She would only latch laying on her right side. I got a flu when she was 7 days old. We had clogged ducts and then mastitis. We had thrush at about 7 weeks. And when she was 2 monts old she was hospitalized for 2 nights with RSV. On top of all that I had really bad PPD so I was dreading every nursing session for the first 4 or 5 months. But we persevered and got through it, and she is still nursing at 22 months and has never had formula. It was anything but "easy".

Moma. Dont feel like a failure!! Know that you tried, and just because you have to give your LO formula, doesnt mean you failed. It means you are doing everything you can to take care of your LO and make sure he/she is fed! And thats what being a parent is about. Doing whatever is necessary to take care of your children!

Keep your head up!

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mama to A ♥:</b>" I just know DHs family all breastfed their babies from at least a year and they all say how easy it was ... [snip!] ... did it for 5 years with multiple children!) Then there's me, who is struggling and trying my hardest but they don't understand."</blockquote>




Oh please don't feel like a failure. Everyone is different. Breastfeeding isn't the best option for everyone. I mean no matter what, no one is debating that breast is better for baby, but formula isn't poison. It keeps them fed and growing too. And the fact that you tried as hard as you did says something about your dedication as a mom. Maybe you'll better luck next time, but it not, you're still a good mom and your baby is still lucky to have you.
In all honesty I think all the problems we had with breastfeeding really contributed to my PPD and if I have the same terrible experience with it after this baby arrives, I don't think I'll last. I just don't think I can do all that again.