re: Spoiled SO....

Ok I am confused because you said

. I told him our budget was $100... because rent and his car insurance is due. And I have to pay the phone bill. $100 in groceries would last us until next week when I had no bills to pay, and $300 to spend on whatever


That looks like you had an extra 300. Am I right? or did I get that wrong?

Ok then you said you spent 200$ on food instead of the 100 you wanted too.

What I am not getting is why can't taht extra 100 come out of the $300 cushion for what ever?


And if taking a 100 form the 300 what ever month was not going to work then why didn't you couldn't how much money you were spending at the grocery store with him and when it was getting near 100$ say
OK time to check out?


I am not trying to be rude(some times it is hard to tell on here) but I want to understand so I can give you some advise. I am just confused about that extra 300 and why it was not ok to go to the food...and if it was not then why did the extra 100 get spent.
.

Quoting bia.:" Really? we spend $200 PLUS a week and that doesn't even do us for the whole week lol.."

Oh yeah we have the 5 for 25 meats.... and they are expensive, fresh cuts... and I stock up on things on sale for side dishes... so I always have them in the cabinet for the most part. I hit sales most of the time..

Quoting kthx.:" All brand name. I'm not even kidding.... even if it's not on sale. He won't eat any other brand. There's ... [snip!] ... brand. There's a few things I can sneak in that are Kroger brand... like bread or shredded cheese. Other than that? Nooope. "

We do name brands too but we don't spend that much... hmm, Kroger's can be a tad bit expensive I think.

Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:" I know how you feel.   When SO's parents come over, my house is cluttered and I feel like they judge ... [snip!] ... is small, and we're not "rich" like them. I feel like they look down on me, but they have never given me a reason to, idk :/"

See, our place is nicer than hers. She lives in a trailer... hence all of the money she is able to spend on her boys. We have a really nice apartment, and everything in it we actually did pay for all on our own. And I was really excited for that. But it looks like we're going back to the same thing of her giving us money whenever he asks for it...

Quoting bia.:" Really? we spend $200 PLUS a week and that doesn't even do us for the whole week lol.."

This is us, too. With no kids  

Quoting applelove:" Ok I am confused because you said . I told him our budget was $100... because rent and his car insurance ... [snip!] ... about that extra 300 and why it was not ok to go to the food...and if it was not then why did the extra 100 get spent. . "

$300 is my next paycheck... which would be $300 to spend on whatever. But RIGHT NOW, we only had $100 to spend on groceries. I told him we could get the essentials now, and then go big shopping when I have my $300 check (I get paid weekly). But he didn't want to.

When I said "$100 in groceries would last us until next week when I had no bills to pay, and $300 to spend on whatever" ... I was saying like, $100 would last us THIS week. And then next week when I had no bills, I could spend THAT $300 on whatever.

Quoting Baby_Majick:" We do name brands too but we don't spend that much... hmm, Kroger's can be a tad bit expensive I think. "

Kroger is the cheapest around here. His mom is a manager there and we get a 10% discount with her card, and then toooons of fuel points.

Quoting kthx.:" Kroger is the cheapest around here. His mom is a manager there and we get a 10% discount with her card, and then toooons of fuel points."

Thats cool... our cheapest is Aldi's and Wal-Mart... other than the local grocery store that does the meats 5 for $25... I can buy 7 meats for $35 dollars, if I would bought a pack a night.. I would be spending between $6.00-$10.00 for one pack of meat... I do all sorts of different kinds, beef stew meat, roast, chicken, pork steaks, pork chops. Steaks... all sorts of different kind of meat, all fresh. I like it... So I buy my meats there. I do go to Wal-Mart or Aldi's, for the rest, there are quite a bit of items I will only do name brand... but I will do a few off brands too.for veggies...

Quoting Baby_Majick:" Thats cool... our cheapest is Aldi's and Wal-Mart... other than the local grocery store that does the ... [snip!] ... for the rest, there are quite a bit of items I will only do name brand... but I will do a few off brands too.for veggies..."

Meat is what kills us. We buy hamburger by the pound... $3.20/lb for ground chuck. Then pork chops are about $7-8. Then chicken breast. It's bad. And I feel like we are buying this weekly. Because we use at least one meat per night. The 3 lb bag of chicken that comes with like... 7 chicken breasts only lasts 2 meals.


And pop.... pop is a bad thing in this house. We can go through 3 12 packs in a week. It's honestly mostly SO... he can drink 2-3 with his meal. Thankfully, he doesn't care what brand the pop is... so Big K was on sale for 4/$9... so we got those. It just adds up so quick. And I feel like it's gone by the end of the week.

Quoting kthx.:" $300 is my next paycheck... which would be $300 to spend on whatever. But RIGHT NOW, we only had $100 ... [snip!] ... I was saying like, $100 would last us THIS week. And then next week when I had no bills, I could spend THAT $300 on whatever."

Ok I get it.

Man to me it is such a turn off, a man who needs to get money form his Mom or his Woman to pay his bills. I mean you don't make a ton of money and now you have to pay his bills with it.

I would tell him too bad on his car insurance and tell him if his Mommy is so willing to help out then have her take care of it.

But I don't put up with the man asking the woman for money, Guess I am old fashioned

The only way I think you can train him not to do this is to write out a budget and make him stick to it. The way you stick to it is not having extra money on you.
Like last shopping trip when he spent and extra $100, you could have gone to the store with only $100 and no extra money or credit cards and then he would have no way of going over...

That is what I suggest you do to help him learn you have to stick to a budget

And when you write out your budget make sure you put some into savings, what ever you have for fun money the same should be savings.
Example
if you put $100 in fun money then at least $100 should go into savings!

Good luck with him!

Quoting applelove:" Ok I get it. Man to me it is such a turn off, a man who needs to get money form his Mom or his Woman ... [snip!] ... same should be savings. Example if you put $100 in fun money then at least $100 should go into savings! Good luck with him!"

We split bills... he pays the bigger bills. Our $690 rent, and his car payment/insurance. I pay my car payment/insurance, and phone bill. So I have no problem helping him with a bill if we had to use the money for groceries. But I hate when he goes overboard... because it means I'll be short even more money. I want to just have one bank account and pile all the money together, but he doesn't want to. Sigh.


We have no savings   We're bad with money... I know we need to start, though.

Dude I'm the same way as your SO and I just cannot help it. My grandparents raised me that way. And since I since we still live with my grandma it really doesn't help.

She is buying me and all my siblings tablets for Christmas. I didn't even ask for one.


Idk how to not be a spoiled brat.      

Quoting May ♥:" Dude I'm the same way as your SO and I just cannot help it. My grandparents raised me that way. And since ... [snip!] ... me and all my siblings tablets for Christmas. I didn't even ask for one. Idk how to not be a spoiled brat.      "

Damn you  

I mean it's cool and all... I just wish he wasn't so reliant on her to help him. Or else he won't know what to do when she isn't there/isn't able to help him financially anymore  

<blockquote><b>Quoting kthx.:</b>" Damn you   I mean it's cool and all... I just wish he wasn't so reliant on her to help him. Or else he won't know what to do when she isn't there/isn't able to help him financially anymore  "</blockquote>




Yeah. I wish it was easy. But its honestly not. I wouldn't just be like "omfg you're a spoiled little mommas boy". Because it really I'd a serious problem. And its all a matter of how you are raised. My SO is in your position, lol. He grew up 1 of 6 siblings and never got a damn thing. He lived off of roman noodles his whole life and I was eating big meals, fast food ect. Ya know?

<blockquote><b>Quoting kthx.:</b>" All brand name. I'm not even kidding.... even if it's not on sale. He won't eat any other brand. There's ... [snip!] ... brand. There's a few things I can sneak in that are Kroger brand... like bread or shredded cheese. Other than that? Nooope. "</blockquote>




That's so me. Lol.