When did you decide

To have baby #2?

I am almost 22 years old and have a 3 year old. SO and I have been together 4 years. I currently stay at home and he's about to double his pay with a new job offer. It's do-able.

I feel like I'm ready, but then I feel that I'm too young. I enjoy still being able to have nights out when R goes to his grandparents. Is that selfish? SO wants another baby, and I do too - I'm just not sure when. Then I get to thinking that I don't want my kids too far apart in age and that I should start now.

Opinions?

I turned 23 a month ago and have a 22 month old (on Dec 3rd) and a 4 month old.

Quoting Love = Moco and Bubba:" I turned 23 a month ago and have a 22 month old (on Dec 3rd) and a 4 month old. "

Were they both planned?

I had my first at 18, and we planned our second I was 21. Now I have a tubal, and SO has had a vasectomy, we are done having children.

We chose to have them close together so that we could still be young when they are more grown. We hated the idea of waiting many years before having another.
So I guess we are being selfish in our own way too, my poor kids having to grow up with me because I'm super immature. lol

ETA: They are 2.5 years apart, and they are best friends... I wouldn't have it any other way. It really reminds me of my sister and I.  

Well you have time! :-) If you wanted to wait. I had my first at 17 so there was no way in hell I was going to have another right away. I just had my second one 12 weeks ago.. They are 11yrs apart. I think with the age difference they wont fight or hate each other :-) If I did it the right way though I would of had them closer together. Its a BIG change going from having a 11yr old who can basically do everything on her own, to having a baby who needs pretty much ALL your time. So if you want you free time still then I would wait. I have gone out once since DS was born. Its hard to go out when you have a baby. Thats my opinion though.,

We were going to wait till our daughter was 6 or 7, but then i lost an ovary because of a tumor and my obgyn said we probably shouldn't wait. We started ttc, when dd was 2 1/2 and our son was born a year later  


I am glad we didn't wait, because i like their age span where it is. Sometimes you really can't tell what would be the "best" time because there is no telling what life may throw your way.

I was also a lot older than you so that factor of feeling too young was there. (I was 25 and 28 when my kids were born).

Quoting Kimber-Lily:" I had my first at 18, and we planned our second I was 21. Now I have a tubal, and SO has had a vasectomy, ... [snip!] ... So I guess we are being selfish in our own way too, my poor kids having to grow up with me because I'm super immature. lol"

Haha! I hate the idea of having them so far apart too. My sister and I are 7 years and don't even speak. But then SO and his brother are also 7 years and he lives with us.

I'm just scared I'm going to regret the little free time I do get. I mean R will be going into VPK soon and I could just stay home with the newborn. It just scares me. I don't know what to do.

Quoting green mama☮:" Were they both planned?"

First was planned. Second was a "what ever happens". We didn't do anything to prevent basically since we knew we wanted another one, just didn't know about timing. And I didn't think I would get pregnant right away but it did and my oldest was 8 months when that happened.

Quoting Mellissa28:" Well you have time! :-) If you wanted to wait. I had my first at 17 so there was no way in hell I was ... [snip!] ... then I would wait. I have gone out once since DS was born. Its hard to go out when you have a baby. Thats my opinion though.,"

I had my son when I was 18 so I totally understand that. I just feel that we're soon going to be stable enough to be able to raise 2 children and why wait? It's not like I HAVE to go out every weekend but it's nice to have that freedom. His grandparents literally show up at my house to pick him up and I know with 2 children that will never happen.

It's such a never-ending battle.

I was 24 when I had my first so that's not gonna help much, but I wait until the previous kid is at least a yr old before trying again. By the time baby is born its almost a 2yr gap, which is perfect for us I'm finding. I've been a sahm since the 1st n hubby has been the one to go for nursing to make more money. That's how I always wanted it so for us it works. Just go w when ur comfy.

i'm 25 and my fiance is 30. my I had my son at 18 and he was unplanned... we decided it was time. my son is 7 and is able to do alot on his own. my choice to wait was because I wanted support. I didn't want to be a single mom of 2. And my sons father is a complete smurf!!!

Quoting green mama☮:" I had my son when I was 18 so I totally understand that. I just feel that we're soon going to be stable ... [snip!] ... show up at my house to pick him up and I know with 2 children that will never happen. It's such a never-ending battle."

There is no "right" time to have another you know. I would just let nature take its course and what ever happens happens. My DS was not planned. I just happened to get pregnant the ONE time we had sex that month!!! So I believe he was meant to be. I was not planning on having more. It just happen... :-) I was at my hubbys christmas get together last yr and they asked us "So when are you going to have another baby?" I was like NEVER!! Well guess what I was 3 weeks pregnant but didnt know it! :-)

Quoting Mellissa28:" There is no "right" time to have another you know. I would just let nature take its course and what ... [snip!] ... "So when are you going to have another baby?" I was like NEVER!! Well guess what I was 3 weeks pregnant but didnt know it! :-)"

Yea I don't want to get all hardcore into planning it. But if we were to get pregnant again - I would be done. I don't think I could do more than 2. But like you, you never know. Good luck!

I had my first when I was 16, almost 17. I waited until I was 21 to have another. She was somewhat planned. We talked about a 2nd and one month I decided I didnt want anymore. But it was too late I was preggo. Then I had our third at 22. And now we are on our fourth, and im 24 . I really enjoyed being a mother after my decond. And everything else didnt seem to matter to me..But Me and my SO have been together for 7.5 years. We have a house. And he makes a lot of money as a miner..

Quoting green mama☮:" Yea I don't want to get all hardcore into planning it. But if we were to get pregnant again - I would be done. I don't think I could do more than 2. But like you, you never know. Good luck!"

Yeah were done too. I think 3 kids would put me over the edge lol! I love my sleep and thats what I miss most.. :-(