Am I rude for this? (babysitting question)

(Long...I apologize for that. ): )
Well, first off, is it weird that I don't want anyone to babysit my 7.5 month old yet? If not, then how do I get people to stop asking me? I do tell them I'm not comfortable with it yet. I tell them I'll let them know when I feel okay with it but they STILL ask every time I see them (particularly my MIL).

She has a bedroom down in their basement, down a steep stairway. The stairway does not have a door in front of it, just an open doorway. It's right next to the living room and with Felix crawling ALL over the place, I would worry my head off if he went over there. Even if that basement thing wasn't an issue, there are other problems.

Like when he was a newborn, she came by to 'help' (kind of uninvited, when I didn't want people around so it felt like an inconvenience to me...) and instead of washing his bottles in hot, soapy water, she just ran them under lukewarm water for a few seconds to rinse them out after they sat in the dirty sink for hours. :/ Her new husband tried pushing me to give Felix baby food at a week old (seriously) so I don't trust him not to feed him things I don't want him eating. (Felix eats solids now but if this guy would feed a newborn baby food then I have no clue what he'd give a 7 month old, you know?)

ANYWAY. She just asked on FB 'You guys want me to take him this weekend? Grandma's available!  ' No. I don't. I know she loves him and I appreciate her wanting to take him for a couple days but I would be a nervous wreck. What do I say? ): It's not just her, really. I don't want ANYONE babysitting this soon. I know I'm not ready to have him away from me. Is that so bad? Sometimes they make it feel like it's wrong of me. ):

No that is completley normal to feel that way. I am the same way. The only person I trust his FIL and his wife. They are the only people who have to got to watch her overnight.

MIL is the same way and I have tons of reasons I don't want her over there without me... but she just makes us feel so guilty.

You don't have to do anything till your ready mama.

You do need to loosen up, it would be good for both of u to have time apart. Set rules before she has him and tell her she needs a baby gate at those stairs and until then she doesnt get him

Just tell her you don't want anybody to watch Felix right now. My DD is 16 months old and I only have her get watched once a week by my dad who we live with so I can go to therapy. I don't feel comfortable right now

what about starting out with them watching Felix for a couple of hours vs a couple of days?

Quoting emmygog[Felix's Mommy]:" (Long...I apologize for that. ): ) Well, first off, is it weird that I don't want anyone to babysit my ... [snip!] ... this soon. I know I'm not ready to have him away from me. Is that so bad? Sometimes they make it feel like it's wrong of me. ):"

No one watched DD except me until she was 6 months, even then it was only for an hour MAX. Now that I'm working MIL watches Piper on Wednesday for 7 hours and it makes me nervous. She keeps pushing for Piper to stay the night but I'm SOOO not ready for that I that's what I tell her. I also made a list that she had to agree to before I let her keep Piper at all. It said things like "do not feed her anything I don't send with her", and "do not leave her alone with the dog". I told her that if I found out she didn't comply with any of those rules Piper would not be staying with her.

<blockquote><b>Quoting emmygog[Felix's Mommy]:</b>" (Long...I apologize for that. ): ) Well, first off, is it weird that I don't want anyone to babysit my ... [snip!] ... this soon. I know I'm not ready to have him away from me. Is that so bad? Sometimes they make it feel like it's wrong of me. ):"</blockquote>




What if you had her watch him at your place for an hour or two to get some Christmas shopping done?
I understand not wanting people to watch him, I didn't have my first night away from DD until she was 18 months old, but I know my mom and my inlaws were dying for a chance to spend one on one time with her to bond in their own special way. Kwim? So I left a list of rules and the food she was meant to have while ibwas gone left labeled in the fridge.

im an ap parent so it killed me when i had surgery this weekend and she was gone for 2 nights. it is good to get a break but only when you are comfortable.

Quoting Mrs Somerhalder:" You do need to loosen up, it would be good for both of u to have time apart. Set rules before she has him and tell her she needs a baby gate at those stairs and until then she doesnt get him"

Honestly, I don't think I can do this yet. I don't really even want time away from him. My husband basically forced me out of the house one day (not really, but insisted a lot) so I could have some 'me' time and all I did was think about my kid and buy him toys and clothes. :/ I don't really want a break from him. Not yet. I'm sure sometime but right now doesn't feel right.

Quoting emmygog[Felix's Mommy]:" Honestly, I don't think I can do this yet. I don't really even want time away from him. My husband basically ... [snip!] ... buy him toys and clothes. :/ I don't really want a break from him. Not yet. I'm sure sometime but right now doesn't feel right."

My Lo is 14 months old and has not slept out overnight yet. I have been asked a number of times from my dad and the MIL but I explained that when I am ready they can have him. My mum has never asked as she understands where I am coming from as I did not sleep out until I was 4 years old. Today was the first time he napped out at my mum and dads due to an appointment. He did really well in a strange room but he does have a very good relationship with them, also my mum does stop at my house when my partner is away on business.

You will know when you are ready, I am the same I am a SAHM at moment and the longest I have been away from him is around 4 hours. I mix him with loads of people and he is a very social little boy, but it is me I am scared when he is not here. Do not feel guilty and just keep saying you are not ready yet, yes you may start sounding like a broken record   but do not be pressured into something you are not happy with x

Quoting Tracy B:" My Lo is 14 months old and has not slept out overnight yet. I have been asked a number of times from ... [snip!] ... ready yet, yes you may start sounding like a broken record   but do not be pressured into something you are not happy with x"

yes this!

If she's grandma, she obviously raised one kid to adulthood. I mean if you need a babysitter, let her. I'm sure you don't care for her parenting style, but I would think she would be ok babysitting.