<blockquote><b>Quoting she nan igans:</b>" When being around kids (young enough to still possibly believe in Santa), what is your opinion on the ... [snip!] ... a kid that Santa is not real, but is it okay to tell a child who doesn't believe that he IS real? Why is it a double standard? "</blockquote>



My plan was to just leave the issue alone and not introduce it to my kids until they got exposed in, say, school but my meddling ass FIL went full fledged Santa talk last year without bothering to ask me so I'm kind of just trying to avoid it right now.

Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:" Not everyone celebrates though. We don't and never will."

You don't celebrate Christmas?

Honestly i say who cares, its not that big of a deal. You do what you want with your kids. If your kid knows he isnt real and someone tries to tell them he is , then just tell them they already know he isnt real. If your kid thinks he is real and someone tries telling them he isnt then your kid might just be confused or sad. You can always say santa was real at one time but no longer is around.

Quoting Jas ♥:" Hmmm, I don't know. I think there is a slight difference between trying to convince a child that Santa is real and disappointing a child by telling them that Santa isn't real."

I'm not sure. I mean, think religion. It's not okay to tell a kid there IS a god, or that there ISN'T a god. We pretty much tell them people believe different things.

So it sort of sucks that kids who don't believe are expected to lie and play along. Or that adults who don't believe are expected to do that. I mean, we wouldn't do that with religion. If a child believes in God, and someone else doesn't, we don't expect them to lie. We tell the child that people believe different things.

Again, my Mom told me that not everyone believed in Santa, and that was good enough for me. People didn't have to lie, and of course people told me he wasn't real, but I knew that not everyone believed in him and that was fine.

I just get annoyed with this whole thing I guess, that people who don't participate are supposed to lie. I wouldn't be like "hey! Santa's not real! hahahah!" But at the same time it sucks that I have to try and explain to my 3 year old that she's supposed to lie to her cousins and pretend something that she knows isn't true, you know?

Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:" Not everyone celebrates though. We don't and never will."

Well, the majority of the US does so I think it would be best to just explain to your child about how people celebrate holidays differently and how you know he isnt real and not to say anything otherwise to people who do think he is real.

Quoting A❤T=P+[It's a Girl:" You don't celebrate Christmas?"

No we don't. My son will also be told from a young age whenever anyone brings up Santa, Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy, whatever, that they are not real and that if they chose to do it that's their family but our family will not.

Quoting she nan igans:" I'm not sure. I mean, think religion. It's not okay to tell a kid there IS a god, or that there ISN'T ... [snip!] ... explain to my 3 year old that she's supposed to lie to her cousins and pretend something that she knows isn't true, you know?"

She wouldnt have to act like she does believe in him, just to smile and nod...like I do to the vast amounts of bible thumpers here.
lol

Quoting JessieLeeAnne:" Well, the majority of the US does so I think it would be best to just explain to your child about how ... [snip!] ... holidays differently and how you know he isnt real and not to say anything otherwise to people who do think he is real. "

So when my kids cousins ask what Santa brought them? Or if they saw Santa? Or what they wanted from Santa? I'm supposed to try and explain to them that they're supposed to make up stories and lie about it?

It seems kids would do better to be explained that they believe different things. Some kids believe in Santa, and that's okay. But other's done. A simple "I don't think he's real, my Mommy and Daddy bought me my presents," is fine. They don't need to argue, but I don't really think they should be forced to "play along" either if they don't want to.

Quoting JessieLeeAnne:" Well, the majority of the US does so I think it would be best to just explain to your child about how ... [snip!] ... holidays differently and how you know he isnt real and not to say anything otherwise to people who do think he is real. "

It's just as disrespectful though for people to push that "Santa is real" on my kid, when we don't believe in holidays, as it would be for me to walk up to a random kid, if I did, which I NEVER HAVE, and said "Hey guess what, your parents are liars and Santa isn't real."

Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:" No we don't. My son will also be told from a young age whenever anyone brings up Santa, Easter Bunny, ... [snip!] ... Tooth Fairy, whatever, that they are not real and that if they chose to do it that's their family but our family will not."

Why does it have to be a big deal that they are not real? Why can't it just be about people having different beliefs and celebrating things differently?

Quoting A❤T=P+[It's a Girl:" Why does it have to be a big deal that they are not real? Why can't it just be about people having different beliefs and celebrating things differently? "

It can be. I think the point is that other beliefs AREN'T respected. A person isn't allowed to say they don't believe Santa is real. They are expected to lie and play along. A child who doesn't believe is told they need to lie and play along. Their ability to NOT believe isn't accepted at all, they're expected to pretend as if they believe.

Quoting she nan igans:" So when my kids cousins ask what Santa brought them? Or if they saw Santa? Or what they wanted from ... [snip!] ... fine. They don't need to argue, but I don't really think they should be forced to "play along" either if they don't want to. "

I agree it's BS that everyone should have to cater to the one side.

when my son was 5 he asked me if Santa was real. I didn't want to lie to him. so I told him the story about St. Nick and how he gave to less fortunate kids, and how over time people made these stories about him. He thought about it for a while, and told me he understood, but the he still wanted to believe the magic story version... so I let him. my sister was upset when he told her kids Santa wasn't real, though.

Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:" It's just as disrespectful though for people to push that "Santa is real" on my kid, when we don't believe ... [snip!] ... walk up to a random kid, if I did, which I NEVER HAVE, and said "Hey guess what, your parents are liars and Santa isn't real.""

I don't think so if you already had a talk to your child about how people think there is a Santa Claus, but it is really their parents. Your child will already know he isnt real and it is just their parents that tell them that.

Quoting A❤T=P+[It's a Girl:" Why does it have to be a big deal that they are not real? Why can't it just be about people having different beliefs and celebrating things differently? "

Because I'd rather be honest with my child and not lie to later break their heart. Besides the fact that we don't celebrate holidays. I'm going to explain to my child what we do and do not do and why. That's kind of like saying "Well, Timmy's mommy lets him eat candy for breakfast. But you're not allowed because I say so." No. I'd explain WHY he's not allowed to have candy for breakfast, just like I'd explain to him why we don't celebrate Christmas or any other holiday.