My family lives in CO and I moved to OK with DH to be closer to his family for a while. I try to go back to CO at least a couple times a year, spcificaly for thanksgiving, but spend christmas here with DH's family. I wasn't going to go this year because I have only been working part time all summer but I have a full time job now. I have thursday through monday off and my family said they'd pay for part of LO's and mine plane ticket to come home for Thanksgiving. DH works friday, saturday, and sunday and we were planning on going to a buffet with his family then spending time with them thanksgiving evening. I haven't seen my cousin in over 2 years and I haven't even met her baby who's 1 already. I bought the plane tickets this morning and have 24 hrs to refund them, then I called DH and he told me he doesn't want me to go. I can decide for myself but he made it very clear he doesn't want me to go because he wants us to spend it with his family (even though we'll be spending christmas with them). I have been very homesick lately too, and a little depressed.

What would you do? Go and have DH pissed off about it or not go and be extremely unhappy about it?

I would go. You are spending Christmas with HIS family, he could be a little more understanding that you miss your family and would like to spend at least one holiday with them.

Quoting Colt's mommy:" My family lives in CO and I moved to OK with DH to be closer to his family for a while. I try to go back ... [snip!] ... and a little depressed. What would you do? Go and have DH pissed off about it or not go and be extremely unhappy about it?"

I would go, he is being selfish

He will get over being pissed. If he doesn't you have a larger issue. You cant get back time with your family. You and LO deserve time with your family even if he wants to be selfish.

Quoting Tiff + 2[girls]:" I would go. You are spending Christmas with HIS family, he could be a little more understanding that you miss your family and would like to spend at least one holiday with them."

 
Seriously? You rarely see your family.. you see his all the time most likely. He should be able to handle you spending time with your family for Thanksgiving.

IMO your family is your DH and LO and you need to be together and you need to do what you need to do in order for the 3 of you to be together. I would want to go but I'd want my baby to spend his 1st thanksgiving with his daddy more

Quoting summerbabyX2:" IMO your family is your DH and LO and you need to be together and you need to do what you need to do ... [snip!] ... for the 3 of you to be together. I would want to go but I'd want my baby to spend his 1st thanksgiving with his daddy more"

The child is not going to remember any of the first 4 most likely. So what is the point really?

Quoting summerbabyX2:" IMO your family is your DH and LO and you need to be together and you need to do what you need to do ... [snip!] ... for the 3 of you to be together. I would want to go but I'd want my baby to spend his 1st thanksgiving with his daddy more"

This is his 3rd thanksgiving. We've spent the last 3 with DH. DH doesn't even like holidays. I just wish he would discuss it with me instead of saying "There's nothing to discuss, I don't want you to go".

Quoting Colt's mommy:" This is his 3rd thanksgiving. We've spent the last 3 with DH. DH doesn't even like holidays. I just ... [snip!] ... like holidays. I just wish he would discuss it with me instead of saying "There's nothing to discuss, I don't want you to go"."

Well you go mom. You aren't his smurfing property.

If you havent seen your family in awhile and,are going to DHs for christmas I say,go see your family

I would go. He is being selfish. You moved states away to be near HIS family. Why couldn't he have taken off a couple days and gone with you? DH and I split time between the families evenly. Hell, one year we did 3 Thanksgiving dinners just so it would be even. You are already doing Christmas with his so being with yours for Thanksgiving would only be fair.

Quoting Colt's mommy:" This is his 3rd thanksgiving. We've spent the last 3 with DH. DH doesn't even like holidays. I just ... [snip!] ... like holidays. I just wish he would discuss it with me instead of saying "There's nothing to discuss, I don't want you to go"."

oh, then nevermind!
GO and tell him you wish he'd understand how much it means to you. I've had this fight many times with my SO and it never feels good when you have to choose, if he doesn't want to talk about it than don't. just go!

I would go. He will get over it.

Its almost like hes saying your family isnt as important as his. Which Im sure isnt how it is, just the way it comes off. If you spend Christmas with his family then you should go see your family for Thanksgiving. Let him know how you are feeling and that it would mean a lot if you can go see your family for a few days. Especially if hes working 3 of those days.

Quoting Tiff + 2[girls]:" I would go. You are spending Christmas with HIS family, he could be a little more understanding that you miss your family and would like to spend at least one holiday with them."

This!!!!! I would go! You deserve to go!