re: My idiot husband!

Quoting kelsey054:" If his job finds out he is in jail he will get fired. So IDK, if it'll be better to find the money to bail him. He is our only income!!"

You can get a job

Seriously, bailing him out will make him think that he can get away with it

Quoting Kelly&Coralie:" You can get a job Seriously, bailing him out will make him think that he can get away with it"

I cannot get a job making as much as he does! Never have and seriously probably never will. I'm not trying to stick up for him, or maybe I am since he is my husband, but dang.

Quoting kelsey054:" I cannot get a job making as much as he does! Never have and seriously probably never will. I'm not trying to stick up for him, or maybe I am since he is my husband, but dang."

So what was the ultimatum you gave him? And what would happen if he picked drinking??

Quoting Kelly&Coralie:" So what was the ultimatum you gave him? And what would happen if he picked drinking??"

IDK yet...I seriously don't have one idea. I have so much on my mind.

Quoting kelsey054:" IDK yet...I seriously don't have one idea. I have so much on my mind."

I'm sorry hun. It's gotta be tough. I couldn't tolerate that.

Quoting Kelly&Coralie:" I'm sorry hun. It's gotta be tough. I couldn't tolerate that."

My family has never been the drinkers, and if they did decide to drink they did it behind a closed door all hush hush. So when I married an alcoholic all of my family warned me, and fear for me. I feel like I should have listened sometimes, but I love my husband more than the moon and the stars. I would give my life for him. I would sit in that jail cell for him. He is my best friend, and only friend at that and to know that he picked alcohol it hurts me so much. I fear for my daughter that she'll grow up with only half or a father, and not the full experience.

I feel like this is my fault also. If I never told him to stop drinking, he wouldn't have been out drinking. He would be at home, not in a jail cell. I know that he could've hurt a lot of people, but geez.

Go stay at your mom's?

Quoting kelsey054:" My family has never been the drinkers, and if they did decide to drink they did it behind a closed door ... [snip!] ... have been out drinking. He would be at home, not in a jail cell. I know that he could've hurt a lot of people, but geez."

You can love him, but not have to be with him

Don't stay for your kids. They don't deserve to grow up with an alcoholic father. They would be better off with a single mom

And it is NOT your fault. HE made the decision to go drinking. HE made the choice to get in the car and drive.

This is 110% all his fault

if you love him let him sit in jail! he needs to be taught a lesson if my hubby did that i would tell him he was SOL and i wouldnt bail him out of jail especially if he was getting out monday and wouldnt have to pay a dime!

I am really sorry Mama.

I very recently broke up with my boyfriend, whom I thought I would be with forever, & was TTC with, because he has progressively become a smurfing drunk ass. Sad, part, he is a 40 year old man not some dumb kid.
I really dont think people like this change until they hit rock bottom, which can take years before they realize they are there & often too late& it seems that the threat of losing everything in their life is never enough to make them stop.
If you want to talk, PM me hun!

damn. i'm sorry.  

I agree with leaving him there until Monday but if you really need to get him out contact a bail bonds place. You only have to come up with a percentage but you need collatrial (sp)

Dont waste all that money on him, let him sit there. Maybe it will teach him a lesson. And when he gets out dont tell him its ok and act like everything is normal. Tell him thats the last straw and he really has to choose now because you cant deal with it.

Quoting kelsey054:" My family has never been the drinkers, and if they did decide to drink they did it behind a closed door ... [snip!] ... have been out drinking. He would be at home, not in a jail cell. I know that he could've hurt a lot of people, but geez."

THIS IS NOT YOUR FAULT!!!! A few years back I gave my ex an ultimatum one night (he drank ALL the time). I told him that he needed to either seek treatment for his alcoholism or it would be over and my son and I would leave. Well that night he decided to go out anyways and he got a DUI in our parking lot at our apartment complex. I left him in jail and refused to pick him up, so he had to walk home. And then you know what I did????? I left!!! I didnt have a job either. But I got one and moved on with my life. Now 4 years or so later I am happily married to someone who isnt an alcoholic and my ex has recently gotten a 2nd DUI. Don't let him drag you down. Yes alcoholism is a disease, but he will only change IF and WHEN he wants to. Think about your future and if he ever decided to get clean then maybe you could work things out then.

I'd let him sit in jail until Monday.
You don't want your daughter to grow up with an alcoholic father, but when he messes up and lands in jail, you're going to spend all of the Christmas/moving money bailing him out?
What was the point of the ultimatum if you aren't going to do anything about it?
I'm not being rude, I'm seriously curious.