My father is at the ending stages of cancer and My oldest son is very close to him, considering we live with him. When the time comes I am at a loss.. I don't know how to explain to my son that his papa isn't with us anymore. My sons everyday routine in the morning is with his papa. To make this very long story short... I don't know what to do.... How should I explain death to him?

I would explain to him that your heart stops beating and you are no longer alive. Also tell him about whatever you believe the after life to be. I would definitely take him to the funeral because it might help him to understand death by seeing his Papa at rest. I am so sorry for your family hun.

i told my daughter that her uncle went to be with jesus and that we will see him again when we get older. im sorry.  

When my son's uncle died I simply told him that death is like when you go to sleep but don't wake up. His cat had died a few months prior and we had him help bury her so it was "final" to him. Definitly take him to the funeral.

I work with children with social emotional disturbances and some, well a lot, of them have lost a parent or a close family member. I was always trained to tell them the truth, as the one person stated tell them what is actually happening (his heart isn't working anymore) and to let it be their choice if they go to the funeral.

I told my son that his brother is gone and that he went to sleep. A long sleep.

Honestly, it's kind of hard to explain to him. He doesn't really understand it. But he "gets" that explanation for now.

When my mother died, I kept my children at a friends house. No child needs to see a dead body. I told them, "Grand-ma died baby. She is gone to heaven with the angles and is not coming back. When a person dies, their body stays here but their soul, that is in their body, leaves and goes to heaven. We put the body in the ground and give them a headstone to make us feel better. It is something to visit since they are no longer around for us to see and talk to anymore."
Then after the funeral was over. I took them to the grave, let them give her flowers, and say goodbye so they can get closure. My kids never had a problem after that. They missed her for a while but that was about it.

I have a packet about children, loss& grieving. it was very helpful. I could send it to you if you would like

I'd tell him that papa had been sick for a long time and he got very tired and now he's asleep for a long time.

I was 9 when my grandmother passed from suicide. I was very close to her. I will say, 19 yrs later and it still feels like yesterday.

My dad sat me down and said "You remember how June died?" (June was my dad's uncle)

I said "Yes"
He said "Well...Nanny...." and he broke down crying
I knew what he was going to say so I finished the sentence. It was hard. Very hard. I had to do therapy after, so if your child is that close to someone, I suggest a child therapist if they take the news too hard.

Sorry about your dad. Wish you the best of luck.

I think you have to look at each individual situation. Every child is different and their maturity level for dealing with death is different. At the end of the day, it's not easy regardless. So sorry for the loss!

<blockquote><b>Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:</b>" I'd tell him that papa had been sick for a long time and he got very tired and now he's asleep for a long time."</blockquote>



Saying they're just asleep could be very confusing for a child. They would probably often wonder, and ask, "when will they wake up?"
I think telling the child that the person's body stopped working would be the best. Then they know it's final.

Quoting Serial Mom ✄:" <blockquote><b>Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:</b>" I'd tell him that papa had been ... [snip!] ... they wake up?" I think telling the child that the person's body stopped working would be the best. Then they know it's final."

Agreed, I also have learned through trainings that it is actually harmful to say that. Some kids are terrified to sleep after they are told that.

keep it simple and factful.

grandpa got very very sick and he won't be able to live with us any more. That sometimes when you are older and you get sick, you die. It's something that is ok to be sad about and we will miss grandpa very much, but we can keep him in our memories and he'll always be with us as long as we remember.

Quoting Anthony's Mommy ♥:" Agreed, I also have learned through trainings that it is actually harmful to say that. Some kids are terrified to sleep after they are told that."

I guess that's where differing beliefs of what happens after death comes in. No child I have ever known within my faith have had a problem with that.

Angela, did Serena and Aiden have issues with it when Seth passed away?