Does anyone else....

Have an SO that is just too much of a realist to believe in....idk what you wanna call it, but true love? Like unconditional? No matter what happened he would NEVER leave you? I mean unless you did something horrible, like really horrible.

Mine has reminded me when we argued that I'm replaceable. That if I "kept making him unhappy".....(we fight every once in a blue moon now)....that he won't stick around. Which I do want him to be happy. I love him and I do want that for him even if it isn't with me. But it hurts to be reminded. He may as well rip my heart out of my chest and run over it ten times with a semi. I'm the type of person who loves wholeheartedly. I have always told him I'll never leave him.

It just sucks to be the person who cares more   it makes me feel so scared. I wish I knew FOR SURE I was the one he wanted forever.

Sorry if this makes no sense. I'm bawling my eyes out. I just needed to get that out. Thanks for listening.

I wish he would say "I would never leave you and I can't imagine my life without you." that's what kind of lover I am and I guess that's my downfall too  

Wow, that's smurfed up  

<blockquote><b>Quoting £egendary £ex:</b>" Wow, that's smurfed up  "</blockquote>




I know. And I know I'm making him sound horrible right now. He's a great dad and wants the best for me and i know he loves me. But he's SO BLUNT and doesn't hold back or ever sugarcoat things. And I'm just the opposite. I'm blunt but I would never be THAT blunt. He has no filter.

Dude, that's way smurfed up! Who says that?
Stop chasing. That's how I got SO to realize he wanted me.

I'm so sorry mama...
I wish there was something i could say to make you feel better  

*BIG hugs*

I guess I can't count on living the rest of my life with SO.
But I can't imagine my life without him.
Does that make me a realist? Because he is the same way.
I guess I say I hope we can be together our entire lives.

But I grew up with my dad being divorced twice before I was 15, and he had been married three times other. So I honestly don't think I can count on spending the rest of my life with someone.

ETA: And SO knows there are circumstances where I would leave him, such as cheating again. And I know there are circumstances to him leaving me, like if I became really violent with him.

<blockquote><b>Quoting [JadeLee]:</b>" I guess I can't count on living the rest of my life with SO. But I can't imagine my life without him. ... [snip!] ... and he had been married three times other. So I honestly don't think I can count on spending the rest of my life with someone."</blockquote>




I think thats the reason I am so hung up on being with one person forever. Because I grew up not knowing my dad til I was 5 when he got custody of me because my mother was (is-"recovered") an awful alcoholic and couldn't take care of me. So I lived with my dad and stepmom. The rest of my childhood was pretty good with the exception of still dealing with the hurt of my mom. Then my dad cheated on my stepmom and they got divorced. So I'm like, I don't want to be that way.

And my SO's parents are still happily married. He wouldn't know what it would be like for our kids to grow up in a broken home, but I do.

I'm pretty much an smurf like that.   I could never tell DH that he is replaceable though. I spit venom like a bitch when we fight and I typically don't hold back. I'm very blunt with DH and I'm very much a realist. People like me suck and I hate that the world has to put up with us. *hugs*

Quoting O ♥ G:" <blockquote><b>Quoting £egendary £ex:</b>" Wow, that's smurfed up  "</blockquote> ... [snip!] ... hold back or ever sugarcoat things. And I'm just the opposite. I'm blunt but I would never be THAT blunt. He has no filter."

idk... I can be blunt too but like... why even say that? it's just mean

<blockquote><b>Quoting Commander Shepard:</b>" I'm pretty much an smurf like that.   I could never tell DH that he is replaceable though. I spit ... [snip!] ... I'm very blunt with DH and I'm very much a realist. People like me suck and I hate the world has to put up with us. *hugs*"</blockquote>



It's kind of comforting in a weird way, to hear that some people are just wired this way. So maybe I shouldn't take it to heart? I'm just always scared he is serious.

Thank you  

And thanks everyone else for just listening to my pity party haha. I think my hormones are a little manic right now too :/ blah.

Has he only said that while fighting?
Cause I know I've said some mean things in the past when we were having an intense fight, and I didn't mean it.

Thats pretty douchy of him. I dont believe love lasts 98% of the time and I'm not a believer in 'true love' but I never would tell my DH hes replaceable because he isn't. I would feel like I was just a used pair of socks that need to be thrown out and replaced if DH ever said that to me.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Working on Babe #2:</b>" Has he only said that while fighting? Cause I know I've said some mean things in the past when we were having an intense fight, and I didn't mean it. "</blockquote>




Yeah. But he's never apologized and never told me he didn't mean it. Always told me he was serious about it. It just makes me think that since he says it in pretty much every bad argument that it's always in the back of his head, KWIM? Maybe I'm just paranoid though. I know ppl say things they don't mean, I do too (not THAT mean though).....but seems like if you're just spouting off that you would mix up what you say sometimes instead of the same thing every time. Maybe he just knows that's what will get me to shut up though :/ who the hell knows. I just know it smurfing sucks. Almost makes me wish that if he wanted to leave then he should do it already and rip the band aid off.

Wow. My 10,000th post would happen to be a depressing as smurf one! LMAO *facepalm*

Quoting O ♥ G:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Working on Babe #2:</b>" Has he only said that while fighting? ... [snip!] ... know it smurfing sucks. Almost makes me wish that if he wanted to leave then he should do it already and rip the band aid off."

I don't think it's an excuse to say smurf like that just because you're fighting. Especially if he doesn't even apologize or act like he feels bad about it