Non-spanking moms

In what situations, if any, do you drop the no-spanking rule? Like, if they did something way worse than usual (an example, please) or if they were doing something that could be dangerous.

And what methods do you use to discipline for repetitive not listening or more serious punishments?

For a preschool aged child.

I have spanked once and I cried and apologized.and told my husband I was a bad mother. He played with his own smurf. I will never drop my no-spanking rule again. I just keep doing timeouts or taking stuff away.

Quoting Rain (aka Mama):" In what situations, if any, do you drop the no-spanking rule? Like, if they did something way worse than ... [snip!] ... what methods do you use to discipline for repetitive not listening or more serious punishments? For a preschool aged child."

Repeatedly asking him to not do something, and he continues to do it would be an example for me.

Thats rare though, my 3 year old usually listens pretty well. I'll do a time out or take away toys, it usually works better then spanking.

I use time outs, quiet time, if my son is throwing things and continues after I tell him no I will take the toy away for the rest of the day and give it back to him tomorrow which he promptly demands when he wakes up. You can cancel plans if they are supposed to be going to jokers and won’t listen tell them if they can't behave they will not be going to jokers and if they continue tell them that you are not taking them and why.

Redirection also still works you just have to word it different also explaining what they will lose or what punishment they will have is usually enough to make them stop what they are doing cause they don't like time out and they don't want to lose anything or miss out on going somewhere fun.

I don’t know if that will work for everyone but I have always taken the time to explain things to my son and have been consistent in my methods of discipline so he understands what I say is what I mean. In all honesty I have only had to cancel plans once and he is 3 usually just saying time out is enough to correct his behaviors very rarely will I have to bring up canceling plans but when I do he knows it’s best to stop because he doesn’t want to miss out on his play time at jokers.

I could never spank my daughter no matter how much trouble she was in.
I would just use simple time outs, or something like that. i have plenty of time to think of something. She's only 5 1/2 months right now.

The only reason I will ever spank my child is if he does something really dangerous, like runs out into traffic.

When my LO is born and old enough she will not be spanked unless she reaches for a hot stove or a knife and thats only to warn her away from it with a tap on her hand. I was abused really really badly when I was little and most of the time it was because my sperm donor didn't believe me that my step brother was raping me. Then my egg donor beat me within inches of my life when I was 17 because I was listening to my music just a bit loud so I didn't have to hear her and my step dad arguing because she was drunk at noon.

Quoting Adriana'sMombie:" I could never spank my daughter no matter how much trouble she was in. I would just use simple time outs, ... [snip!] ... use simple time outs, or something like that. i have plenty of time to think of something. She's only 5 1/2 months right now."

How can you say that for sure. She's only 5 months old.  

I'm really confused why spanking would suddenly become an option when the child is doing something dangerous. Punish them instead of teach them?

Quoting Vindictive:" I'm really confused why spanking would suddenly become an option when the child is doing something dangerous. Punish them instead of teach them?"

I've smacked my sons hand away from the stove when it was on. In a heat of the moment, "get your hand away from that!" type of thing.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Vindictive:</b>" I'm really confused why spanking would suddenly become an option when the child is doing something dangerous. Punish them instead of teach them?"</blockquote>




It's usuay instinct. Their first reaction is "Danger!" *push/slap hand/kid away"

Quoting Rain (aka Mama):" I've smacked my sons hand away from the stove when it was on. In a heat of the moment, "get your hand away from that!" type of thing."

I guess I don't consider that "spanking".

Quoting Vindictive:" I guess I don't consider that "spanking"."

Hmm, makes sense though. I guess it could be debatable since it's not being used as an actual "punishment".

In which case, I wouldn't give an actual spanking for something like that. The only time I'd consider it is for repeated/ "you know better" offenses. Like him drawing on the walls in his room with marker, which sparked this post, lol.

Quoting Rain (aka Mama):" Hmm, makes sense though. I guess it could be debatable since it's not being used as an actual "punishment". ... [snip!] ... for repeated/ "you know better" offenses. Like him drawing on the walls in his room with marker, which sparked this post, lol."

I would take away the markers/pens and put them some where he couldn't reach I had to put my son's up because he colored all over his bed with them. If you have rubbing alchole put some on a cloth and wash the wall where he colored it should take it right off.

Never. Non hitting is nonhitting. If you do it sometimes, youre a sometimes hitting parent.

We use redirection, restraining (gently, to keep them fryom danger), positive conflict resolutuion, talking/ working through things and teaching them to think things through, mediation. We do not punish OR bribe.