Forums > Sex & RelationshipsPage 1 2 3 4by: kthx.

Stamina?

posted 5th Nov
I didn't realize how much this was hurting SO until earlier. He literally wouldn't look at me because he was so..... ashamed  

He doesn't last long in the bedroom. From the time I give him a BJ, to completion... 5-10 minutes. Max. We usually only have sex for about 2 minutes before he busts.

He texted me at work and this is how it went:

Him - I'm having self confidence issues with this.
Me - Babe why?
Him - It shouldn't be happening
Me - Maybe you should see a doctor?
Him - Maybe
Me - I love you regardless.
Him - Not sexually. It's cuz I'm fat and stressed.
Me - What? (I didn't understand what he meant by the first statement).
Him - You don't love me sexually.
Me - Baby yes I do. Don't say that.

  I don't know what to do! Earlier, I asked him if it was like this with prior girlfriends. And he said it was never this bad. I remember him telling me how he had lasted an hour with one girl, and then with the chick he was with for a few years... he lasted much longer.

Is this something a doctor can fix? He's not fat... he's 6'7 and 270 lbs. At least he doesn't LOOK fat. Just built. I know weight can affect stamina... but he was around the same weight a few years ago, as he is now. We need something. I feel so bad that he's having confidence issues because of this...
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I'm TTC since November '12, have 2 angel babies & live in Cleves, Ohio
posted 5th Nov
What happens if you don't give him a bj?
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I have 2 kids & live in Georgia
posted 5th Nov
Don't give him a BJ before sex!


My SO has to distract himself during sex, he can't look at me naked until he's ready to finish. That usually helps.


But now I encourage a fast ending because.. well.. postpartum sex SUCKS BAWLZ.  
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I have 1 child & live in Indiana
posted 5th Nov
Quoting Twin's Mommy:" What happens if you don't give him a bj?"


Same thing. The BJ doesn't really make a difference... I'll still only get about 2 minutes of sex. We've tried avoiding the BJ and just rubbing/tugging... but it doesn't help. He's only 23... and it's not like he's new to sex and he's going through some post-virginity early busting.  
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I'm TTC since November '12, have 2 angel babies & live in Cleves, Ohio
posted 5th Nov
Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:" Don't give him a BJ before sex! My SO has to distract himself during sex, he can't look at me naked ... [snip!] ... ready to finish. That usually helps. But now I encourage a fast ending because.. well.. postpartum sex SUCKS BAWLZ.  "

We've tried no BJ   Same outcome.

I have to keep my shirt on... because if he sees my tits, it's over even faster. He's tried thinking of other things... doesn't work. We've tried different positions, doesn't work.
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I'm TTC since November '12, have 2 angel babies & live in Cleves, Ohio
posted 5th Nov
Quoting kthx.:" Same thing. The BJ doesn't really make a difference... I'll still only get about 2 minutes of sex. ... [snip!] ... it doesn't help. He's only 23... and it's not like he's new to sex and he's going through some post-virginity early busting.  "

What about if he gets off and you wait a bit to try sex?
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I have 2 kids & live in Georgia
posted 5th Nov
Quoting aubriesmom:" maybe your just that good!   "

Hahah well of course ;)

But really, I asked him if that was it... if I just had a golden vagina or something   And he says no.. he cums just as fast with my mouth, ass, etc. URGH. I'm at a loss  
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I'm TTC since November '12, have 2 angel babies & live in Cleves, Ohio
posted 5th Nov
Quoting kthx.:" We've tried no BJ   Same outcome. I have to keep my shirt on... because if he sees my tits, it's over ... [snip!] ... it's over even faster. He's tried thinking of other things... doesn't work. We've tried different positions, doesn't work. "

Have you tried no foreplay at all?

And has he tried to masturbate before you have sex? Usually getting the first load out helps the next one take a bit longer.
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I have 1 child & live in Indiana
posted 5th Nov
Quoting Twin's Mommy:" What about if he gets off and you wait a bit to try sex?"
this is a good idea....we have done it before
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I live in Switzerland
posted 5th Nov
Quoting Twin's Mommy:" What about if he gets off and you wait a bit to try sex?"

He can't go again after getting off. I don't know why... he's the only man I've been with that can't go again after busting. He said it literally hurts to cum a 2nd time (like right after busting the first time). His balls hurt.

He DID have to have a doctor help one of his balls descend when he was younger. Could that be causing anything? The pain, early busting?
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I'm TTC since November '12, have 2 angel babies & live in Cleves, Ohio
posted 5th Nov
There are simple tricks to delay male orgasm that he probably just doesn't know about. Spend some time looking them up and then share them with him. For instance, there is a male equivalent of doing kegels that can delay orgasm that supposedly many of them don't even know about. Since I'm not a boy, I cannot personally attest to that, but my husband read it in a book and he swears it works.
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I have 1 child & live in Utah
posted 5th Nov
Quoting Autumn Whisper:" There are simple tricks to delay male orgasm that he probably just doesn't know about. Spend some time ... [snip!] ... know about. Since I'm not a boy, I cannot personally attest to that, but my husband read it in a book and he swears it works."

Awesome. Thank you!!
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I'm TTC since November '12, have 2 angel babies & live in Cleves, Ohio
posted 5th Nov
Quoting kthx.:" He can't go again after getting off. I don't know why... he's the only man I've been with that can't ... [snip!] ... to have a doctor help one of his balls descend when he was younger. Could that be causing anything? The pain, early busting?"

I don't know about the last part. I am using Google. Is he circumcised? The website I'm currently one said that if you squeeze the penis, at the tip where the head meets the shaft for 5-30 seconds (not in a feel good way), that it will help last longer.
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I have 2 kids & live in Georgia
posted 5th Nov
Hmm. So I went to Google and typed in "helping male stamina"

and the first link that popped up was something saying "Increase Your Sexual Stamina." .... and it's highlighted like it's already been a viewed page.

Poor guy   He's been looking things up....
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I'm TTC since November '12, have 2 angel babies & live in Cleves, Ohio
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