I miss my stepdaughters terribly :/

The oldest is Jade, she's 6. We havent seen her in months   We keep trying to get her mother to meet us halfway to get her for the weekend, and we never get a response. We are being told by his family, which take care of them because she can't hold a job that she makes Jade call her boyfriend daddy and she just wants her to forget about us. He pays child support and everything   Our youngest is Bailey, she's 1 almost 2 (this was a sex only relationship between them & she got pregnant. He tried dating her and broke up within 2 months). Her mother is very spiteful, and we asked to trade holidays this year since she had her last year, and she said that would not be happening. We haven't seen her in over a month   The simplest solution would be to take both to court right? WRONG, not that simple. According to the Family Law clerk, we have to open a court case for both, which is $400 a piece (not something we can afford right now), pay $60 for each seperate mediation we have to go to to come to an aggreement on visitation. I miss them soo much, I can only imagine how Justin (my SO) feels   What gets me is that Kendra (Bailey's mother) knows how it is for a child to grow up without a father, her dad did it to her, and I would expect more from her, not this petty bs. I pray for my babies nightly and I hope we can one day see them again. Sorry, I just had to vent.

You don't have a set visitation schedule?

Aww I'm sorry hun   I didn't know it was that expensive to do custody battles!  

I though there was a way around those fees for court issues like that. You couldn't get a free consultation with a lawyer?

he can go get them and she cant stop him. have the cops come with you.

Ummm usually if he's paying CS he should be gettin visitation

<blockquote><b>Quoting Thorian's Mommy:</b>" he can go get them and she cant stop him. have the cops come with you."</blockquote>



That's if he's on the BC but if they have a court issued custody agreement he can't just go take em if she has physical custody right? But since the gma has them I think he could he take them...

If I missed my "babies" that much I'd be finding a way to come up with the money to see my kids. It sounds like your SO is just making excuses. If someone tried to keep my children from me I would do anything in my power to get custody of them. Even if I had to go without eating.

You do know you aren't their mother and they aren't your babies, right? You are his girlfriend, not their mommy.

Quoting Jays*Mama:" You don't have a set visitation schedule?"

The child support agreement was made through a court in SC, and it doesnt have anywhere on there that I've read that he gets the kids any set time. They do it here in Duval county,FL where I live but I guess not there.

Quoting Thorian's Mommy:" he can go get them and she cant stop him. have the cops come with you."

I work for the sheriff's office here, and according to them, the mother has all the rights and even if we had a court ordered visitation schedule and she doesn't abide by it, we just have to keep taking her to court until a judge does something about it (like contempt)

Quoting Nicole Mclovin:" If I missed my "babies" that much I'd be finding a way to come up with the money to see my kids. It sounds ... [snip!] ... tried to keep my children from me I would do anything in my power to get custody of them. Even if I had to go without eating."

It's not that easy. Especially when we have my daughter, paying bills just to live, our baby is on the way. We document everything (the phone calls, the messages, the text messages) everything that is said, and each time that we have had them for visitation, and around income tax time is when we will finally have the money to take them to court.

& for the record, I can sense the attitude from looking at this computer screen, I didn't come here to get judged. I came to baby gaga to make friends with other MATURE & CIVIL mothers. Thanks  

Quoting * Sara *:" You do know you aren't their mother and they aren't your babies, right? You are his girlfriend, not their mommy."

I never said I was their mother. I'm his fiance and we've been together for almost 2 years so I'm not just another girl in his life, and they definitely don't call me mommy. they know me as Layci.
Stepmothers can love their stepkids just as much as their spouse does, and why should they be judged for it? They shouldn't.

Quoting Haleigh's Mom:" I never said I was their mother. I'm his fiance and we've been together for almost 2 years so I'm ... [snip!] ... Stepmothers can love their stepkids just as much as their spouse does, and why should they be judged for it? They shouldn't."

Don't worry about them. A stepmother can definitely love their step child/ren as much as a mother/father.
I hope you guys figure everything out soon. I'm sure your SO will be much happier being able to see his LOs

<blockquote><b>Quoting Haleigh's Mom:</b>" I never said I was their mother. I'm his fiance and we've been together for almost 2 years so I'm ... [snip!] ... Stepmothers can love their stepkids just as much as their spouse does, and why should they be judged for it? They shouldn't."</blockquote>

A step parent who loves their step kids so much is a welcome sight for me. Especially considering that, from what you've wrote, their bio moms aren't fantastic. If your so's mom has custody of one of them he can go get her whenever embed would like as long as his mom says its ok. And as far as the other one, why can't you drive all the way there if her mom won't meet you half way?

And I realize what's done is done but why would he try to have another baby with you if he can't afford to take legal action to see his existing children? This decision seems like a poorly thought out one. I'm really jus curious about what the thought process was there?