Forums > Parents with Kidsby: ~I'm his beauty~

What would you do/ I need advice(long)

posted 3rd Nov
I have a 9 year old son. I have sole custody of him, and he has always been with me.His dad's got visitations every other weekend, we split holidays and summer break. At the beginning of the year my son was getting into trouble and wouldn't do his work. Was in school suspension, out of school suspension.The principal told me if he got into trouble again they would call the school officer, and they would take it from there. I was scared they would send him to juvy. So, his dad wanted him full time to try helping him out. My son had to go to a new school, and I only get to see him on the every other weekends. I hate this, and hate being away from my son. Now he's not doing any better at the other school. And My ex-husband is not letting me see my son like I want too. He is trying to make all of these rules. Yesterday, I told his dad that I was going to keep him Monday and Tuesday since they are out of school. He was like well I will have to check with "Whitney" (his new wife) to see if she had him any doc appts or plans made for him. WTF!!!!! I was pissed. but didn't say anything. I feel like he is trying to push me out of the picture. I don't know what to do anymore. I want my son back but afraid if I put him back into his old school he will go to juvy. I can never have a converstation about our son with his dad because his wife's in the back telling him what to say. I can't take it anymore...I want what's best for my son. and I'm his mother not her!!! I"m just confused on what to do...Need Advice. Please don't think i'm a bad mom  
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posted 3rd Nov
Quoting ~I'm his beauty~:" I have a 9 year old son. I have sole custody of him, and he has always been with me.His dad's got visitations ... [snip!] ... for my son. and I'm his mother not her!!! I"m just confused on what to do...Need Advice. Please don't think i'm a bad mom  "


...I would just keep him. Legally you don't need their permission.
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I have 2 kids & live in Minnesota
posted 3rd Nov
Do you have a written custody agreement between you and his father? If he's not doing better over there, take him back and get him into some type of counseling. Being over there may make it worse especially if his stepmother is that controlling.
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I have 2 kids & live in Poland
posted 3rd Nov
<blockquote><b>Quoting ~I'm his beauty~:</b>" I have a 9 year old son. I have sole custody of him, and he has always been with me.His dad's got visitations ... [snip!] ... for my son. and I'm his mother not her!!! I"m just confused on what to do...Need Advice. Please don't think i'm a bad mom  "</blockquote>




Ugh I'd take him back and do home schooling or send him back to the old school since he's not doing any better.
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I have 2 kids & live in Lakeland, Florida
posted 3rd Nov
At this point I think you should be focusing on the things your 9 year old is doing that could get him sent to 'juvy' and trying to get that worked out..
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I have 3 kids & live in Aurora, Colorado
posted 3rd Nov
Do you still have sole custody through the courts? I would just take him back and tell my kid that he needs to shape up or he'll have to go to juvie and ask him why he's been having so much trouble.
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I live in Maine
posted 3rd Nov
Quoting I❤V&B:" Do you have a written custody agreement between you and his father? If he's not doing better over there, ... [snip!] ... and get him into some type of counseling. Being over there may make it worse especially if his stepmother is that controlling. "



There's nothing been in writting since I let my son go with his dad. Everything is still the same. Just now his dad is being hard to get along with. And not letting me see my son. I have tryed getting him into counseling, but the last time I Went. That counselor didn't even talk to my son. Instead he got me alone and starte bible beating me, So I didn't go back. And finding a new counselor is going to be hard in my small town. But I did change his doctor and going to a new one Tuesday. I'm hoping that she will help me out and give me some answers I need.
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posted 3rd Nov
I would take him back and get him into some kind of counseling. There has to be a reason behind why he is acting out.
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I have 2 kids & live in Venezuela
posted 3rd Nov
Quoting ~I'm his beauty~:" There's nothing been in writting since I let my son go with his dad. Everything is still the same. ... [snip!] ... I did change his doctor and going to a new one Tuesday. I'm hoping that she will help me out and give me some answers I need."


That's a good step. Is his father at least trying to figure out the problem?
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I have 2 kids & live in Poland
posted 3rd Nov
Quoting ♥ Mrs. S ♥:" I would take him back and get him into some kind of counseling. There has to be a reason behind why he is acting out. "




Yes, he has some issues going on. I want to get to the bottom of it. The reason why I let him go with his dad in the first place is because the teacher at this old school. She told me that he needed a male role model in his life. I thought well i'll give it a try..and thats not the case.
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posted 3rd Nov
Quoting I❤V&B:" That's a good step. Is his father at least trying to figure out the problem? "



My son was dignosed with ADHD last year. Along with that I believe he has other issues going on. I know he needs help but his dad on the other hand thinks that he is just being mean and hateful for nothing. Also doesn't think that he need counseling. He think's it's a waste of time.  
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posted 3rd Nov
Next time you get him I would keep him and enroll him back into his school and go get something written up with the courts.
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