Would you keep your labor a secret?
posted 2nd Nov
I'm not planning to tell the family until the LAST MINUTE. They wouldn't be allowed in the room until baby was there any ways, but my SO says it's not a good idea because his mom would get 'upset' because she's already ass hurt that I don't want her in there when I'm actually pushing. GTFOver it...
Is it really a bad idea, though? I'm sorry but if I'm in pain, I'm not going to want to talk and put up with his mother. I hate her, but I wouldn't want my own mother in there either. I dno't want to exclude them at all don't get me wrong, but I don't see the point in them having to be up my ass until he's here. Why the hell do I have to worry about her feelings while I'm trying to push a baby out!? She lives 5 minutes from the hospital and works there so she'll probably already be there. I don't see the harm in not telling her until it's time to push (that way she can be there when baby is out and see him in the nursery blahblah). I've heard pushing can take anywhere from 20 mins to an hour and seeing as this is my first baby it will probably be the latter. There will be no rush, he isn't going to just fall out!!!!
But seriously. Is it just my bitch hormones? I am SO tired of having to do things so SHE doesn't get upset. Can I not even give birth the way I want to? SmUrfING seriously!?
quotesmurfs?posted 2nd Nov
Yes, yes and yes. I was planning to with my daughter but BD is a dumbass and called people the SECOND I went in the hospital. If I had my way I would be in the Hospital alone, deliver alone, go home alone, and have maybe a week alone before being inundated with the visits.
quoteposted 2nd Nov
Quoting ☼ MĒ mĒ:" I'm not planning to tell the family until the LAST MINUTE. They wouldn't be allowed in the room until ... [snip!] ... tired of having to do things so SHE doesn't get upset. Can I not even give birth the way I want to? SmUrfING seriously!? "
Pushing can take seconds (or hours)
but you can tell her and then just tell the nurses that you refuse visitors until after the baby is born
quotesmurfs?posted 2nd Nov
I was in the hospital for three days, going through an induction, before we told anyone (except my Mom). I didn't want people calling a thousand times or just showing up at the hospital. It's your labor, it should go the way you want. Screw what other people want!
quoteposted 2nd Nov
I wouldn't keep it a secret but tell them you want the labor to go the way YOU want it to. If they get upset then tough smurf, tell the nurses and doctors that if anyone tries to come into the room to keep them out.
quotesmurfs?posted 2nd Nov
TBH I had so many guests at the hospital after I delivered I NEVER got any rest. I will not be telling anyone when I'm in labor, in fact; if I can help it I won't be telling anyone until we are home.
quoteposted 2nd Nov
<blockquote><b>Quoting ☼ MĒ mĒ:</b>" I'm not planning to tell the family until the LAST MINUTE. They wouldn't be allowed in the room until ... [snip!] ... tired of having to do things so SHE doesn't get upset. Can I not even give birth the way I want to? SmUrfING seriously!? "</blockquote>
I did only because it happened so fast at night time I didn't want people coming to see us till we got sleep.
quotesmurfs?posted 2nd Nov
I wish I would have kept it secret.
All of BD's friends drove up. To the hospital.
And then he left with them for the night while I was in labor because "they needed someone with them... they drove all that way..."
quoteposted 2nd Nov
My plan was to have SO,MIL,n my oldest SIL. when I actually start pushing it may just end up me and SO. everyone is starting to get on my nerves,mainly my MIL and she's just so touchy feely and Im only like that with SO. I dont like to be touched especially when Im in pain by anyone except my mom (rip) and SO.
quoteposted 2nd Nov
i didnt tell anyone except my mom because i lived with her lol. i told her not to call ANYONE. but she wound up calling a few people but they never came i just wanted that time to be between my bf and i to share with out little pumpkin. they even made my mom leave i could only have one person stay in the hospital over night. so we got all the time we needed lol
quoteposted 2nd Nov
I told my husband and my mother not to tell anyone when I went into labor that the rest if our family could know after she was here. My dads side of the family is completly obnoxious and very opionated and I didn't want.to have to tell anyone to smurf off so until 4hr after my daughter was born it was my husband and my parents, but I made my.dad leave the room while I delivered. BTW first time mom could push for hours on end.... Hope yours is fifteen min like mine
quotesmurfs?posted 2nd Nov
Quoting Derpy Hooves:" Yes, yes and yes. I was planning to with my daughter but BD is a dumbass and called people the SECOND ... [snip!] ... be in the Hospital alone, deliver alone, go home alone, and have maybe a week alone before being inundated with the visits."
im so with u on the alone part. its like i just wanna be left alone for a while.
quoteI have 4 kids & 3 angel babies & live in
Californiaposted 2nd Nov
Hospitals don't want all kinds of people showing up your SO mom should look at it from your point of view I'm not comfortable with my Mil seeing my nooks and crannys plus this is our first after 2 losses so we want to be just the two of us I think he should respect your wishes
quoteI have 1 child & 2 angel babies & live in
Ontarioposted 2nd Nov
Quoting ☼ MĒ mĒ:" I'm not planning to tell the family until the LAST MINUTE. They wouldn't be allowed in the room until ... [snip!] ... tired of having to do things so SHE doesn't get upset. Can I not even give birth the way I want to? SmUrfING seriously!? "
I tried to do this.. we didn't tell anyone that things were moving along until I was about 7cm. Then both out mothers kept calling my cell phone and getting pissed off when I didn't answer, my mother packed a sad because I got SO to tell her to stay away, and my aunty burst into the delivery room as I was pushing. I was too tired to care then, but now I'm smurfing furious. I haven't seen her yet to give her a piece of my mind but it will not be pretty when I do. I wish I had waited until he was actually out to let people know, it would have saved me a whole lot of stress. I remember being in transition and screaming at SO "JUST SmUrfING TELL THEM I HAVE OTHER Smurf ON MY MIND RIGHT NOW AND TO STAY THE SmUrf AWAY!" lol. It's up to you how you want to give birth to your baby and to hell with the rest of them IMO.
quotesmurfs?posted 2nd Nov
we let people know when i went into labor, but told them we would let them know when visitors were allowed. then the nursing staff was told no visitors unless they checked with us first. certain family members showed up at the hospital while i was still in the delivery room, and even after i was moved to my recovery room i still didnt allow them in my room for a couple hours because it was OUR time.
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