re: Official single moms/dating thread!

Quoting snglemama:" : D I'm so nervous about tonight!! He said start fresh.... so.. no going back to his place right? cause.. I certainly woudln't on a first date!! haha"

Yes, NO SEX. Yet.  

Quoting snglemama:" yea, I'm going to go. I figure... if nothing happens.. maybe I'll finally get the closer and realize ... [snip!] ... even really believe in marriage anymore) I want to wake up next to him every day, and go to bed by his side everynight."

that last line alone is a great reason for u to at least give this a try. (im still catching up lol)

Quoting Mrs.Josh Ramsay:" Like I think I may have a tad overreacted about the picture thing, but Id like to get ot know someone before sending them pictures of my bits and peices.. if you know what I mean"

nothing wrong with that. if u tell him no you are not fond of taking those kind of pictures, especially to someone you are still getting to know and he doesnt respect that then smurf himm he isnt worth the time anyways

i think i just moved wayyyy too fast with this guy.

i joined a dating website called evow. and it was soooo boring lol but on the day i signed up i saw a guys picture and i said wow he is handsome, i would like to meet him. so i :winked: him on there. all these other guys sent me messages but then on the end of day 1 he started messaging me (that was last week thursday), we exchanged numbers, and ended up staying on the phone for 5 hrs. every time after that we just talked and talked and talked until like 2 or 3 am.

here is the too fast part. his birthday was the 12th and he asked me to be his bday date. i said yes, and made him some cupcakes for the little shindig he had at his house. we ALMOST had sex. and i had to stop him and tell him #1 i have my period and #2 i do not want to take this too fast, im not comfortable having sec with u. he said ok. valentines day,....... my parents invited him to our family dinner, because he wanted to take me out but i refused to miss the family dinner.

HE CAME TO DINNER WITH MY WHOLE FAMILY , GUYS! he bought my mom a bottle of her fave brand of wine (without my knowledge) and he bought me a huge bouquet of my favorite flowers. i was surprised and flattered. my son met him and liked him (but of course i said that was my friend and there was no hint that it was other wise)....


i know this is too fast esp because we had the sex talk twice about me not wanting to move to fast..... but i like him alot.

what the smurf should i do. how do i slow this down?

Quoting Is that still my name?:" The entire situation sounds iffy to me... I like to leave the past in the past.. but I don't always ... [snip!] ... by my own rules. lol Just be careful... you never know what will become of any relationship, but you can always have safe fun!"

update. AMAZING night. : D

was great. went for sushi, then for a drink. Then, back to his place. I asked why now... he says he never stopped missing me. Spent the night. He made me coffee in the morning... I told him I didn't want to push, but he knows how I feel, and I'm not going to stop saying I love you just because of worrying about his reaction. He kissed me and said he loves me too.

: D

Quoting snglemama:" update. AMAZING night. : D was great. went for sushi, then for a drink. Then, back to his place. ... [snip!] ... not going to stop saying I love you just because of worrying about his reaction. He kissed me and said he loves me too. : D"

awww im glad u had a great night

I'm so glad to see this thread! My lo is 11 weeks today and have been single since the stick turned blue. I have a lot of anger that the guy has never laid eyes on his son, but that doesn't mean all guys are that way... and even though I love spending time with my child, being the only one jumping at every single need while trying to get used to such tremendous responsibility can feel very lonely. Not to mention how i feel like i'm missing out on sharing the experiences of being a parent! When Ladon does something, I get excited and I want to talk about it with someone who is just as excited for me as I am.
I tried out eHarmony in January and went on one date. The guy even said I could bring my baby with me, but I chose to leave him with a sitter for a couple hours. I thought I was being responsible. I took a lot of smurf about how I should focus on my baby, and how dare I even think of dating, and if I were a good mother I wouldn't even want to go out. I started feeling pretty low, as if something were wrong with me for wanting to step out of the nursery for 2 hours to try to get to know someone.
Unfortunately, the guy kept talking about these amazing things his kid was doing....which i was into, until i found out he was talking about an imaginary kid in a tabletop role playing game. Eek? After that flop, i felt even worse.... because it was like validating that i shouldn't have even bothered........ but after reading what others have posted in this thread, I really feel a lot more human after seeing I'm not weird and I'm not alone.

Thank you for that.

Quoting Cyn Haynes:" I'm so glad to see this thread! My lo is 11 weeks today and have been single since the stick turned ... [snip!] ... have posted in this thread, I really feel a lot more human after seeing I'm not weird and I'm not alone. Thank you for that."

No you are not weird.... and do not let anyone make you feel bad for wanting to date. No one wants to venture into single parenthood willingly. It is tough. And you DO want a partner in life, so you are responsibly trying to.... I know how you feel about wanting to tell someone when they do something neat! And the anger will go away... you're still a BRAND new parent... everything is new... the first year is the hardest, so you will most likely harbor anger. It's NORMAL! You just have to learn how to deal with it.  

Quoting Cyn Haynes:" I'm so glad to see this thread! My lo is 11 weeks today and have been single since the stick turned ... [snip!] ... have posted in this thread, I really feel a lot more human after seeing I'm not weird and I'm not alone. Thank you for that."

this makes my blood boil! it pisses me off SO much when people say that stuff to a single mom. If you were MARRIED... and had an 11 week old baby... everyone would be ENCOURAGING you to get out of the house... go on a date with your husband... not to forget you're a woman, a wife first.... to take care of yourself, that you're a better mom when you take care of your needs.

but... when you're a single mom.. you're supposed to "focus on your child" what the smurf is up with people?

you're absolutely allowed to date.. especially if you do it responsibly.

Quoting snglemama:" this makes my blood boil! it pisses me off SO much when people say that stuff to a single mom. If ... [snip!] ... on your child" what the smurf is up with people? you're absolutely allowed to date.. especially if you do it responsibly."

My mom puts that on me continually, I hate it. It really sucks. I made the comment to her that she went out a minimum socially with the groups that she was involved in when I was growing up 8 times a month without ANY of her 4 children with her. She seems to think that I should NEVER do anything without my daughter, :-( I hate being told that it makes me a bad mom.
The one time I was dating someone since my divorce who was willing to see me only on the weekends that my daughter is with my ex turned out to be married. I don't know how to even try to date since that.

given our complicated history.. I'm trying not to push.. just relax and see where this goes. but... when you're already in love with someone.. that's hard.

last night I hadn't heard from him all evening... and didn't text him but it made me a little sad. (only because I know what's his normal when dating ya know?) but... reminding myself that I'm not going to stress... I just went to bed and didn't worry about it.

but.. woke up this morning.. and he had texted at midnight.. he had a meeting than ran late (AA, with his sponsor)... missed me, and wanted to say good night! made me smile, and reminded me to CALM THE SmUrf DOWN lol.

most of the time we were apart.. I was frustrated because I KNOW he loves me.. but wouldn't be with me. Now.. we're together, and I'm stressing over how he feels. ugh....!!

quiet in here again

so far so good with my guy.

omg ladies.. I am doing the same old song and dance with BD.. what is the matter with me? yet I complain when it crashes and burns? but he is the only man ive had sex with that can make me O!...
He knows since our split in march 12 that I have been with two other guys and be on a few dates, we went on a drive last night and he said he just wanted random flings so i said fine you do that but I want a relationship and a family.. than we were texting later and I asked him point plant are you hurt that I have slept with other people? and he said "kinda and no one wants me". I still very much love this man, and we spent the 14-17 just us and our kids and it was pretty awesome, but he feels like Ive had my flings now he wants his..
But i can still feel that love there despite what others say.. smurf i feel like chelsea from teen mom 2.. bash if you must but I dunno dude..

Also it's either sex the ex or there is a younger guy who wants to start up a FWB like I had posted about before lol.

Quoting Mrs.Josh Ramsay:" omg ladies.. I am doing the same old song and dance with BD.. what is the matter with me? yet I complain ... [snip!] ... dude.. Also it's either sex the ex or there is a younger guy who wants to start up a FWB like I had posted about before lol. "

I have no room to talk, because I'm back with an ex and will likely get crushed again too..

but.. sounds like he just wants sex mama.. and is upset that it's not as easy to get as he expected. : (

Quoting snglemama:" I have no room to talk, because I'm back with an ex and will likely get crushed again too.. but.. sounds like he just wants sex mama.. and is upset that it's not as easy to get as he expected. : ("

least we can have eachother to talk to about it.. its hard to let him go dunno y