re: SmurffY ASS BABY DADDY.

Quoting Brianna G :" Well he will have to. He helped make it now he can help raise it."

in all honesty, sometimes it's BETTER if the bio dad isn't there to help raise the baby.. especially if he shows no interest now in claiming the baby as his..

my BD was 24 when we had our first, turned 26 right after our second was born. he's now 28 and is a POS and hasn't seen our kids in a yr and a half. bc he just doesn't care. he knows they're his, but he doesn't care. and i'd rather not try to make him be a dad to them. i'd rather them figure out how much my DH (their step dad) really loves and cares for them. and he is THEIR DAD. not the sperm donor POS man BD is...

granted, he give me $ every month.. $400 for two kids. when their daycare is $200/week. so on average, it's around $1000/ month :/ yeah. doesn't help too much. but in all honesty. i don't want to file for child support legally. bc i have every intention on asking him to sign his rights over to DH once i'm out of school and don't need his help anymore.. he's never there anyways. i'd rather DH adopt my kids and they know who really loves them...

<blockquote><b>Quoting *Amo a Mis Nenas*:</b>" in all honesty, sometimes it's BETTER if the bio dad isn't there to help raise the baby.. especially ... [snip!] ... and don't need his help anymore.. he's never there anyways. i'd rather DH adopt my kids and they know who really loves them..."</blockquote>




Hopefully I will be able to find a good guy one day. It just sucks because he's known this girl for 2 weeks and already treats her like a queen and is changing his whole life for her

Quoting Brianna G :" <blockquote><b>Quoting *Amo a Mis Nenas*:</b>" in all honesty, sometimes it's BETTER ... [snip!] ... just sucks because he's known this girl for 2 weeks and already treats her like a queen and is changing his whole life for her"

That bubble will burst. Infatuation does that to people. Maybe he's just using her as an excuse to escape from his responsibilities. He's a boy, not a man. He's going to have to man up and financially support his child, the court will make him.

<blockquote><b>Quoting veggie86:</b>" That bubble will burst. Infatuation does that to people. Maybe he's just using her as an excuse to escape ... [snip!] ... He's a boy, not a man. He's going to have to man up and financially support his child, the court will make him."</blockquote>




I tried telling him at first that we could just work something out between us and not have to go to court and then he started denying the baby. Because I was texting another guy a few weeks ago. He claimed I had been sleeping with him and this guy was the father! He is just a stupid, inconsiderate smurf.

He thinks that because he's going to college to play basketball that they won't make him pay a dime. They will just tell me there is nothing they can do.


And he says if I do take out child support he is signing over all of his rights and never wants to even see the baby.

Quoting Brianna G :" He thinks that because he's going to college to play basketball that they won't make him pay a dime. ... [snip!] ... can do. And he says if I do take out child support he is signing over all of his rights and never wants to even see the baby."

Wow, his bubble really will pop when the baby gets here. He has no idea what's to come. What a selfish jerk.

And that's his choice. He will still be ordered to pay child support. I'm sorry your child will have a father like this. Who knows, maybe he'll eventually change his mind and want to be in her/his life. Or maybe it's best he isn't in their life. Don't worry about what he's doing, the court will deal with him. Just worry about raising your child  

<blockquote><b>Quoting veggie86:</b>" Wow, his bubble really will pop when the baby gets here. He has no idea what's to come. What a selfish ... [snip!] ... he isn't in their life. Don't worry about what he's doing, the court will deal with him. Just worry about raising your child  "</blockquote>




It just hurts me so much. And he like throws it in my face. He claims he loves her. I'm just mind blown with everything. I guess in time I will be better.

BTW. he can't sign over his rights unless there's someone there to step up and be daddy. and for that to happen you have to have been married for a yr and that guy want to adopt your baby. so your BD has a big awakening when he realizes he can't just sign his rights over. and you CAN take him to court for CS. smurf. i can get my BD ordered CS and he's not even legal. i'm sure they can get CS from him!

<blockquote><b>Quoting *Amo a Mis Nenas*:</b>" BTW. he can't sign over his rights unless there's someone there to step up and be daddy. and for that ... [snip!] ... you CAN take him to court for CS. smurf. i can get my BD ordered CS and he's not even legal. i'm sure they can get CS from him!"</blockquote>



Well good. He thinks he can just up and leave me own my own. Such a dick move.

Quoting Brianna G :" <blockquote><b>Quoting veggie86:</b>" Wow, his bubble really will pop when the baby ... [snip!] ... he like throws it in my face. He claims he loves her. I'm just mind blown with everything. I guess in time I will be better."

hey lady. i'm just going to give you some advice okay?

you don't need a man to raise your baby.

you dont.
i was really depressed for a long time being a single mom. bc i thought i deserved to have help with OUR child. but what i came to realize, was things happen a certain way for a reason. i wouldn't be with my DH if i hadn't of been separated from BD. and i would rather BD be in my kids life all the time, or not at all. and he chose not at all.. it isn't hurting anyone but himself. bc one day he'll realize what he did was wrong and want to make it better. and by then , my kids wont like their real dad.

so just take it a day at a time. and remember you DO NOT NEED HIM..

but def take his ass to court for CS..








and i know how hard it is emotionally. but it DOES get better. in time. you wont be A-Okay instantly. you just have to give it time. i promise

Quoting Brianna G :" He thinks that because he's going to college to play basketball that they won't make him pay a dime. ... [snip!] ... can do. And he says if I do take out child support he is signing over all of his rights and never wants to even see the baby."

No matter if he signs his rights over or not, he still has to pay child support. I don't know how it works with each state, however, in NJ if he doesn't pay child support he loses his license and gets thrown in jail. I would definitely find out what the laws pertain to you in this case. I have researched everything for myself just in case. I'm 21 and I love my husband but he is very immature and has a hard time putting the baby and me first. She will be here in less than 3 months and although he is getting better you never know what can happen. Always have a back up plan. Because no matter what the little one has to come first. You are going to be a great mom. He is a dick and if he can't wise up and be a man and support you. Then sm**rf him, he don't deserve to be in you and your childs life. You are better off without him. If you ever need someone to talk to feel free to message me girly =)

hi, im sorry you are going through this , i know how it feels my BD left me when i was 9 weeks pregnant so he could be "free" from responsibilities, he knows that my babys his tho but his family refuses to believe it. if you ever need someone to talk to message me. =]

Thanks everyone. I really appreciate the advice. And I know I don't need him and every day he just keeps giving me a better reason to leave him alone for good.

All I asked was if he would help buy some baby stuff. His response was "you can't force me to buy anything so stop trying"

I'm just over it. When March comes he will realize he has responsibility and its not just a game...

As for me, I feel much better than I did. Hopefully I keep progressing.

Thanks everyone for everything!

Quoting sweetbea Z&D my loves:"   I was 17 in college"

i was too.