dear daughter, i am sorry

For bringing you into this world without a father in your life. I did not have a mother, and I hurt a lot because of it while growing up. I felt like I did something wrong and that I was unlovable. It still affects me now. I thought your sperm donor would step up. I wanted you even before you were conceived. I loved you so much that I thought I could be momma and daddy. I thought for sure once he saw you, he would change his ways. I was wrong. I am sorry you are going to ask for him and see other kids with their daddies. I am sorry you are going to cry for him. I can try my best to love you with all my heart, to hold you and wipe your tears, to lie and tell you your daddy loved you but he wasn't ready, but I will never be your daddy though, no matter how much I try to over compensate. You are going to have a hard enough life but I have made it worse. I am so sorry baby, that I cannot protect you. I thought I would be enough but I know I can't.

Awh   I'm so sorry your going through that. My mother felt the same way when she realized my father wasn't going to step up or change his ways. I turned out a lot better than I would have if she had chose to keep him around though. You may not be able to replace her father or be both mama & daddy but I have faith that she will understand later in life why she got one great mother to take care of her. I know nothing anyone says will make you really feel any better but I hope you remember that you are your childs sun, moon & stars. You are her everything. I know from experience that I would have been completely lost without my mother. I hated that my father wasn't around but when I got older, I understood why he didn't need to be. Goodluck mama  

I felt like this at one point after I had my son but I met my husband and he is a wonderful father to my son. They may not have the same blood but my son knows who is daddy is.

It hurts to read this. My daughter is almost 5 and has never met her 'father'. We were best friends for 2 years before getting pregnant with her.. he left only a few weeks later. We've talked maybe a handful of times since she was born and he still doesn't care. I took aj to meet his family in July. They didn't care about her either..It breaks my heart. I feel like there is nothing I could do or say to make it better for her.  

With enough love and attention everything can turn out just fine for her. One of my best friends grew up with a single mom and she has done more amazing things than I have coming from a household of two parents. Don't allow that to be her excuse and help her to achieve her dreams. And one day you may end up finding someone who can be that father figure for her. But until then, do your best to be the best mommy you can be.

<blockquote><b>Quoting  Amanda(::</b>" Awh   I'm so sorry your going through that. My mother felt the same way when she realized my father ... [snip!] ... my mother. I hated that my father wasn't around but when I got older, I understood why he didn't need to be. Goodluck mama  "</blockquote>




Thank you. My counselor told me it is better to.never have him around then in or out. My mother was in then out at 7. I loved her so much then she chose drugs over me. She and I are ok now bc she helps with lo but I will never think of her as my mother. This has made me a better mother. I will never be like her. But my father was my rock. Little girls need their daddy.


I am thinking that I just need to cut him off completely. He doesn't help me or see lo. He critiques my mother style and is selfish. I just hate that my sweet, beautiful child has to grow up knowing her daddy doesn't love her.

<blockquote><b>Quoting tonys_mama(army wife):</b>" I felt like this at one point after I had my son but I met my husband and he is a wonderful father to my son. They may not have the same blood but my son knows who is daddy is."</blockquote>




I am glad you found that. I hope for that but sadly, I am so damaged that I honestly see myself alone forever. I do not want my daughter to.be like me or grow up like me  

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mama Mallo (::</b>" It hurts to read this. My daughter is almost 5 and has never met her 'father'. We were best friends for ... [snip!] ... didn't care about her either..It breaks my heart. I feel like there is nothing I could do or say to make it better for her.  "</blockquote>



My bd family doesn't care either   she is an only child and I think about her being all alone when I grow old. She is so innocent and beautiful.

I am sorry you are going through that momma

<blockquote><b>Quoting White Chocolate Milk:</b>" With enough love and attention everything can turn out just fine for her. One of my best friends grew ... [snip!] ... may end up finding someone who can be that father figure for her. But until then, do your best to be the best mommy you can be."</blockquote>



Thank you  

I'm sorry   she's so beautiful!

<blockquote><b>Quoting momma melissa85:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting  Amanda(::</b>" Awh   I'm so sorry your going through that. ... [snip!] ... my mother style and is selfish. I just hate that my sweet, beautiful child has to grow up knowing her daddy doesn't love her."</blockquote>

I would cut him out completely. My father came & went as he pleased until I was almost 14, was on drugs & very abusive. It hurt me a lot more to have him around than it would have if he'd never been there. Its hard   it really is. My father didn't want to be an active part of my life until I was 19. I had daddy issues out the wazoo but I have coped with them for the most part. I love him as a friend now, I don't see him as my father because he never wanted to be

<blockquote><b>Quoting bia.:</b>" I'm sorry   she's so beautiful!"</blockquote>




Thank you

Quoting momma melissa85:" <blockquote><b>Quoting  Amanda(::</b>" Awh   I'm so sorry your going through that. ... [snip!] ... my mother style and is selfish. I just hate that my sweet, beautiful child has to grow up knowing her daddy doesn't love her."

I'm going through the same thing and I was raised by a single mother. I really wanted her to have her father around. His family doesn't even want to meet her it just tears me up.

<blockquote><b>Quoting  Amanda(::</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting momma melissa85:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting  Amanda(::</b>" ... [snip!] ... have coped with them for the most part. I love him as a friend now, I don't see him as my father because he never wanted to be"</blockquote>




Thank you for sharing. I think that is best. I keep giving him chances and it hurts me so.bad for her. I.just want to protect her.

I am sorry you had to grow up without a dad

<blockquote><b>Quoting Brie Fleurs:</b>" I'm going through the same thing and I was raised by a single mother. I really wanted her to have her father around. His family doesn't even want to meet her it just tears me up."</blockquote>




I just don't understand it