Custody questions

1. If there is no custody agreement, we live in different states, and BD has seen him 3 times in his life, Do I need permission to move to another state? I have always been LO's sole provider.

2. When filing for custody, what should I expect? Its all new to me. Also, should I wait until I move to file or do it now?

1. If there's no custody agreement, you can move to Africa if you'd like.
2. Wait until you move, if you file now, you'll have to stay in your state.

no you do not need permission to move to another state. you can file for full custody and if the father wants he can ask for visitation. but if he has only seen the child 3 times then its pretty much up to the judge.

You don't need permission to move if there's no custody agreement. And I'd wait to file if you even need to. If you're the child's sole provider and the child's father is not involved, I'm not sure why you need to file for custody? But if you need to for whatever reason, move to your new state first.

Quoting Blair Waldorf (SuperKink):" You don't need permission to move if there's no custody agreement. And I'd wait to file if you even need ... [snip!] ... involved, I'm not sure why you need to file for custody? But if you need to for whatever reason, move to your new state first."

I was talking with someone else about this... I never thought about it. When he was born BD was not on the BC. I filed for child support when he was two years old.. paternity test was done... paternity was established etc. I was told a new BC would be issued but I never got one or was told I had to get one but now Im scared. If there is no custody agreement I dont want LO spending any time alone at BD's parents house. idk, maybe I'm weird. I don't want my kid being taken lol

Quoting A&J. ♥:" I was talking with someone else about this... I never thought about it. When he was born BD was not on ... [snip!] ... I dont want LO spending any time alone at BD's parents house. idk, maybe I'm weird. I don't want my kid being taken lol"

Ohhh yeah if LO is going to be spending time with HIS parents, then I completely agree that you need a custody agreement in place.

My kids don't have that option. Both paternal families aren't involved at all. Their choice.  

Quoting Blair Waldorf (SuperKink):" Ohhh yeah if LO is going to be spending time with HIS parents, then I completely agree that you need ... [snip!] ... agreement in place. My kids don't have that option. Both paternal families aren't involved at all. Their choice.  "

Yeah, its nice to have them in some ways. I would never want to keep that from my son. But this past time I visited I heard some things with them kind of pushing the "dad" thing with him and I really did not like that. my LO does not know that BD is his dad and why should he? I mean really, three times in his life. Hes practically a stranger. Idk it just pissed me off and now Im fueled and on fire about the custody thing. lol but I was thinking I should wait til I move to Virginia.

Quoting A&J. ♥:" Yeah, its nice to have them in some ways. I would never want to keep that from my son. But this past ... [snip!] ... me off and now Im fueled and on fire about the custody thing. lol but I was thinking I should wait til I move to Virginia. "

Yeah definitely wait until you move so that you're where you want to be first. But I would definitely file for custody AND have a talk with them about not mentioning BD. He's not involved and it's up to YOU how you handle the BD situation. They should respect that or if they CHOOSE not to, they're choosing not to have a relationship with their grandchild.

Quoting Blair Waldorf (SuperKink):" Yeah definitely wait until you move so that you're where you want to be first. But I would definitely ... [snip!] ... They should respect that or if they CHOOSE not to, they're choosing not to have a relationship with their grandchild."

Its so annoying because they've asked me before if he knew that Dan was his dad, and I said no, and I was pretty firm about my reasoning why. Nothing has changed since then, not for the better at least. Since that talk BD has been in drug treatmenet and now lives in a halfway house so why the hell would they think its ok now? Urrrghhhhh 

Quoting A&J. ♥:" Its so annoying because they've asked me before if he knew that Dan was his dad, and I said no, and I ... [snip!] ... BD has been in drug treatmenet and now lives in a halfway house so why the hell would they think its ok now? Urrrghhhhh "

Yep, I agree with your reasoning.