Deadbeat, I'm starting to think so.

I am extremely annoyed. My BD and I split almost 3 months ago now and in this 3 months he has seen our son once. That one time was last weekend and let me tell you it was like pulling teeth getting him to agree to keep DS for just one night. The only reason I even let him is because I have been having some medical issues and haven't been able to care for DS, so I BD's help. Then this week my medical issues went from bad to worse when I figured out our daughter that I am pregnant with is under stress (her heartbeat kept dropping and her movements slowed) and they put me on bed rest basically. My mom had been planning to leave on a trip to our home state to care for my grandmother who recently was in a bad accident, and after hearing the news insisted on taking DS because I obviously can't care for him.Well when I told BD he flipped, but I explained to him my lack of options, and he claimed he understood. Not 2 days later he was texting me complaining about not getting to see our DS because he was leaving on a Saturday and BD supposedly was "loaded down with work" and "didn't have the gas money". I felt bad but what was I supposed to do? Well last night my girlfriends were over for my birthday and we were sitting around the fire, and I was explaining to them everything going on and one of my close friends tells me that she saw my BD that day riding around in her neighboorhood with his friends. Are you kidding me? Her neighboorhood is literally like 5 minutes away from mine. If BD didn't want to see his son, I feel like he should have just said so.. don't lie to me and make me feel pity for you. Expecially not when i'm already worried about so many other things. What would you do or say to him?

You know, I don't understand men sometimes..dh and I broke up once and it was only for 3 days but I kicked him out and he was staying with his uncle..the very next day he was calling to see our son and had him for nearly the whole day..all 3 days he made sure he saw him and as pissed as we were at each other he saw our son..the third day we had a very long talk and got back together...

It just baffles me how any guy could just say "I'm not with my kids mom....screw my kid"...

How about nothing., Dont say smurf to him. File for child support and custody. My ex says the same smurf...

Quoting Yurvette [♥]:" How about nothing., Dont say smurf to him. File for child support and custody. My ex says the same smurf... "

This is the best advice ever!!!

Quoting Mrs.O!:" You know, I don't understand men sometimes..dh and I broke up once and it was only for 3 days but I kicked ... [snip!] ... long talk and got back together... It just baffles me how any guy could just say "I'm not with my kids mom....screw my kid"..."

This! Someone explain to me how you can just wake up one morning and act like you don't care about your child just because you and the mother aren't together anymore. For god sakes that is his own flesh and blood.

Quoting Yurvette [♥]:" How about nothing., Dont say smurf to him. File for child support and custody. My ex says the same smurf... "

I'm going on wednesday to file for child support, if I can get an appointment of course.

Quoting amc ❤:" I'm going on wednesday to file for child support, if I can get an appointment of course."

You dont need an appt. All you have to do is fill out paperwork. And then they mail you the court date.

Quoting Yurvette [♥]:" You dont need an appt. All you have to do is fill out paperwork. And then they mail you the court date. "

http://dcss.dhs.georgia.gov/child-support-process
I was reading this and it said call to make an appointment.

Quoting amc ❤:" This! Someone explain to me how you can just wake up one morning and act like you don't care about your ... [snip!] ... care about your child just because you and the mother aren't together anymore. For god sakes that is his own flesh and blood."

I really don't understand how men can do it. You said it best, DeadBeat! my bd saw our son at his convience for 6 years, some times with 6 month intervals. but when we got in front of a judge it was because I didn't call him that he didn't see our child. I dont think it is ok to play with a childs emotions

Quoting amc ❤:" This! Someone explain to me how you can just wake up one morning and act like you don't care about your ... [snip!] ... care about your child just because you and the mother aren't together anymore. For god sakes that is his own flesh and blood."

I dont smurfing know... Ive been asking myself that for a while now. I took my son to the er a week ago.. and come to find out that while we were in there my ex fell asleep so I was texting his wife.   And then 4 days kater he texts me if he is fine now. Then 6 days later he calls to talk to his son aobut going to the er.. I dont get it. But you have to realize that its not worth beating a dead horse.

Quoting amc ❤:" http://dcss.dhs.georgia.gov/child-support-process I was reading this and it said call to make an appointment."

Oh ok.. I didnt know. All I had to do was fill out paperwork and turn it in.

Quoting Leash25:" I really don't understand how men can do it. You said it best, DeadBeat! my bd saw our son at his convience ... [snip!] ... of a judge it was because I didn't call him that he didn't see our child. I dont think it is ok to play with a childs emotions"

I don't know, it literally blows my mind.

Quoting Yurvette [♥]:" I dont smurfing know... Ive been asking myself that for a while now. I took my son to the er a week ... [snip!] ... to talk to his son aobut going to the er.. I dont get it. But you have to realize that its not worth beating a dead horse. "

That is wear I am having issues, I hate to see my son call for his dada when he is sick or just missing him.. breaks my heart. At this point though I have done all I can possibly do to help him.

Quoting amc ❤:" That is wear I am having issues, I hate to see my son call for his dada when he is sick or just missing him.. breaks my heart. At this point though I have done all I can possibly do to help him."

I know how you feel. 3 days ago my son and I had a talk. We started talking aobut how he felt about his dad [my son is 5] and hes like I hate him. He doesnt see me. He doesnt call me. He doesnt care. He doesnt have tiem to see me.

Then when he says this stuff. I say Daddy loves you, daddy cares, he is just busy.

There is nothing much that you can do to make him be there. Trust me, I have been there where my son cried out for his father and all I could do was sit on the other side of the wall and cry. Its horrible. But it will pass. I never talk smurf on my sons father to my son. But I see how badly he hurts. My feeling is he is making his bed so he has to lie in it.

Quoting Yurvette [♥]:" I know how you feel. 3 days ago my son and I had a talk. We started talking aobut how he felt about ... [snip!] ... smurf on my sons father to my son. But I see how badly he hurts. My feeling is he is making his bed so he has to lie in it. "

Yeah, I could never talk sht on my BD to my son but I feel like our children will both form their own oppinions on him based on how he treats them. I just don't think it is fair for BD to walk in and out of our sons life with almost no consequences (however you spell that). It is hard on me, so I can only imagine how it is for him because he is so young that he doesn't fully understand yet.