re: Cya *

Quoting xTJ:" You know I have just noticed something very very telling in your original statement, you end your definition ... [snip!] ... to let go of because people don't normally have to let true love go at all, that sounds like something bad not something good."

Both of your posts have been spot on

Agree x1000

Quoting xTJ:" You know I have just noticed something very very telling in your original statement, you end your definition ... [snip!] ... to let go of because people don't normally have to let true love go at all, that sounds like something bad not something good."

Sometimes I try and convince myself that I'd be better off alone, I have my share of issues and he puts up with it, just like I do his. I always feel like a burden, that he deserves more..... but he's constantly reassuring me that isn't the case. There is a lot people do not know, and I wish before everyone started pointing fingers, calling my relationship unhealthy without knowing all of the facts, people would have had the decency to at least ask. I never claimed that my relationship was perfect.... no one has a perfect relationship. We had a huge talk a few nights ago, and we agreed to get some help in our relationship. Being parents at 18 and 20 isn't an easy thing, and it has definitely changed us..... but it's made us both realize that we are in this together and that if we work hard at it, things are going to get better.... And they will 

<blockquote><b>Quoting Tiffany ღ:</b>" Sometimes I try and convince myself that I'd be better off alone, I have my share of issues and he puts ... [snip!] ... us both realize that we are in this together and that if we work hard at it, things are going to get better.... And they will "</blockquote>


The thing is people are going off the statement you made, your own definition of love. People are telling you as I am also that is absolutely not true love, what that statement describes is so far from true love it's unreal anyone would describe it as that . It is exactly what people are telling you it is, a completely unhealthy mess. You may not want to listen to the other people who are telling you they left that relationship and you and him will never be happy but at least take it from someone who has been through more or less the same thing and made it work. We haven't just put up with each other either I mean we have truly made it work and couldnt ask for a better relationship. You can make it work also but the first step both of you need to make is admitting the mess your relationship is in, take ownership of both of your own faults and not just blame each other, wipe the slate clean and make a brand new healthy commitment to each other that you will both work together as a team and a family not against each other. You need to stop deluding yourself with that ridiculous definition of "true love" in order to take that first step. Do not get defensive with all the other girls on here about their opinions because let me tell you every single one is 100% spot on. The fact is the majority of girls have been through exactly what you have and do know what they are talking about, you are not the first and you will not be the last. Trust what everyone is saying that description is absolutely unhealthy and if you both can't make it work LEAVE and if you both can well then that's great. I know exactly how hard it is being a parent at that age, we were 18 and 19 ourselves but like I said we sorted our smu*f out before the baby comes because trust me if our relationship had of stayed the way it was and he didn't want to work with me to make a happy and healthy life I would've left! Don't put your child through a situation like the one you described, don't put yourself through it either.......... I see you said you have both talked to each other and decided to get help so I wish you all the luck with that. Many people said we would never work either and years later everyone who has known us from that time or who meets us says how well suited we are and how well we get on so it can work!! At the risk of repeating myself again ONLY if you both change, not not not whilst being anything that resembles that horrid description.

Quoting 12.21.07¤04.18.13:" <blockquote><b>Quoting *Amo a Mis Nenas*:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ... [snip!] ... long because of "love". Even now he gives me the butterflies like no one else, but that doesn't mean I should be with him  "

^she said. You know what.. You can feel that strongly about someone and it does NOT mean you should be with them. I feel like I might die without BD & when I look at him I just want to love and hug him but he treats me like smurf with this messy off/on stuff and that is how I know we should not be together.

Believe me it hurts OP but the situation you describe is so unhealthy. Like someone else said it is addictive, dependent, clingy among other things and those are not love. Respect is not walking away because things are tough. Damn.. you're original post is the mindstate I would love to be in to justify sticking around and hurting my childs emotional health .. but because I have a daughter I just can't put her through it.

I am 20 and he is 25, I'm not sure if thats considered "young" love like yours but I guess it just proves how stupid a man can be at even that age to convince you that what he is giving you is "true" love. Believe me, he says it to me too. He tells me he will never give up on me, he loves me so much/will never be with another girl but everything he does contradicts what he says - and I would give SOOO many things to believe him and make excuses for why he is giving me less than I deserve *right now*. It's sad... it sucks.. but going back to him just proves to him you don't deserve better.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Tiffany ღ:</b>" I'm not being pissy it just aggravated me when people tried saying stuff about me and my relationship..... ... [snip!] ... were polite about it but the way you put it just came off as ignorant to me. It's over and done with now though, I don't care"</blockquote>


it's BG though....most people on here like to get on here and talk smurf....so if you don't want people criticizing you don't put your life out there in any way you don't want people talking about it....just saying. I personally don't care about your relationship... Do what works for you and if it doesn't good look, theres plenty of fish in the sea  

Quoting £egendary £ex:" Damn, that sure as hell isn't mine."

      

My true love would never leave.

Quoting Robbie's Incubator:" True Love: EXTREME EDITION"

Smurf, my boyfriend and I REALLY love each other, then.  

My parents have the type of relationship that you described as "true love" and it made me and my sisters all messed up about what a relationship is suppose to be. I hope for your sake as well as your child's you reevaluate what true love means to you. Because Remember that your children should come first. You as mother set an example please coming from a product of parents who fit your exact description of "true love"

Quoting £iones§:" My parents have the type of relationship that you described as "true love" and it made me and my sisters ... [snip!] ... you reevaluate what true love means to you. Because Remember that your children should come first before suppose "true love""

        

My children are my true loves. Cos honestly ... Things could change and I could fall out of love with SO even though I can imagine spending the rest of my life with him. But my children? I will love them fiercely with everything I have until I die. They will come first, as they should.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Cariad (SuperKink):</b>"          My children are my true loves. Cos honestly ... Things could change and I ... [snip!] ... with him. But my children? I will love them fiercely with everything I have until I die. They will come first, as they should."</blockquote>




I feel the exact same way I love my husband but I will always put my son first I couldn't imag

<blockquote><b>Quoting £iones§:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Cariad (SuperKink):</b>"          My children ... [snip!] ... should."</blockquote> I feel the exact same way I love my husband but I will always put my son first I couldn't imag"</blockquote>




Oops messed up at the end.. I'm on my phone but yea I couldn't imagine having my son live with a relationship like op describe because I know from personal experience that in a relationship like that majority of the time the kids end up the most messed up while the parents c

While the parents continue living life justifying its "true love"

I'm sorry.