re: Going Out As A Parent

Quoting ☾BizzyBee♉:" Not married but we live as such. NO. I do NOT have to ask permission to go out, and I do not have a ... [snip!] ... treated is normal. The psychological hold he has on you is bad, and he knows it's there and that he has that control over you. "

that last part i s so true

Quoting Alicia Holz:" that last part i s so true"

Then you need to do something about it. Leave his ass...

<blockquote><b>Quoting ☾BizzyBee♉:</b>" Then you need to do something about it. Leave his ass... "</blockquote>




i know but when i did try to get help theres a mim of a 3 year waiting period cause of how bad times are...and forget about jobs it took me 3 years to find my last one which i was there for almost 5 years but it was only $150 every 2 weeks not enough to live on cause i have a felony so as soon as bosses see that during my interview its over

Quoting Alicia Holz:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ☾BizzyBee♉:</b>" Then you need to do something ... [snip!] ... only $150 every 2 weeks not enough to live on cause i have a felony so as soon as bosses see that during my interview its over"

3 year waiting period for assistance? Highly doubtful. I looked it up, and there is no mention of any waiting period, and that would make no sense anyhow, since people need help NOW, not 3 years from now. If your husband or someone else told you that, they lied to you.

And what's your felony... I've seen many people hired with a felony on their record...

Quoting ☾BizzyBee♉:" 3 year waiting period for assistance? Highly doubtful. I looked it up, and there is no mention of any ... [snip!] ... else told you that, they lied to you. And what's your felony... I've seen many people hired with a felony on their record... "

This. There are places that will hire with a felony... just have to show initiative.

Quoting ☾BizzyBee♉:" 3 year waiting period for assistance? Highly doubtful. I looked it up, and there is no mention of any ... [snip!] ... else told you that, they lied to you. And what's your felony... I've seen many people hired with a felony on their record... "

burglary and whats really sad with our goverment is that i had 15 years hanging over my head..got 4 months on the braclet cause i could afford the $120 bucks a week to be on it at that time..but this girl 17 years old was driving really fast flipped her truck killed about 5 people and there talking about letting her go with a slap on the wrist cause what she has to live with every day is horriable..i can see if it was an accident black ice,deer jumped out,ect but when your going 80-85 mph thats just stupid...and i called the only apartment that goes on income based that might have openings alot of places are taking them off cause there sick of dealing with drug dealers and bad people so the owners don't want to help which is sad really..

Quoting Alicia Holz:" burglary and whats really sad with our goverment is that i had 15 years hanging over my head..got 4 ... [snip!] ... them off cause there sick of dealing with drug dealers and bad people so the owners don't want to help which is sad really.."

Yeah I was so not talking about Section 8 housing. Go down to the Social Services and file for Welfare and FS and ask for help leaving your emotionally and psychologically abusive husband... They have resources and can and WILL help you!

I've seen people hired with Burglary charges before. Hell, we used to hire felonies over smurfbox you-neek names all the time.

Is there a women's shelter around you? They can help you with everything and keep you safe...they won't even tell him you're there.

Quoting ~Ice Princess~:" Is there a women's shelter around you? They can help you with everything and keep you safe...they won't even tell him you're there."

there full to cap theres only one in town

Quoting Alicia Holz:" i know i could get welfare but with this country this day and age i would rather have it go to a mom ... [snip!] ... fine leave me but what kind of life will you give the kids not even having a job and hes right..it wouldn't be much of a life.."

Let me tell you something and this isn't mean in a ignorant way but rather an eye opener.

I left my super controlling ex 3 years ago. He used to demean me so badly that I didn't want to have friends, or go anywhere. I was a slut for wanting to have a social life. He would do passive aggressive things to me when I was gone. Like cutting holes in my clothes, knowing I wouldn't wear them . No clothes, no money to buy them, that meant I didn't leave the house.

He constantly put me down for having PPD, not wanting to have sex and for being 'fat'. I quit my job to stay home with my son, and once I wanted to go back to work, it was always a song and dance about how everything would be MY responsibility and he wouldn't help me pull it off.

The night before I left him I asked him to wake up with my son, and he cheap shotted me in the face. Pulled me glasses off and stuck his fingers in my eyes until I saw stars.

You want to know something? I didn't even think twice about leaving him. I HAD to. Who knows what next time would have brought. I had no car, no money and no job, BUT I LEFT. I found a place to stay, and I hit the streets looking for a job. I applied for welfare, because it IS THERE for women like you and myself.

My children and I slept for a year in a twin bed with a space heater on an enclosed porch. I found a job, that I hated but I did it. I aggressively sought after the job I did want in this year's time. I got it.

3 years later I make MORE money. I am talking A LOT MORE MONEY than he does. I am completely self sufficient, and about to buy my first house.

Don't say you can't do it. Because you are capable, if you want it, you can do it.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Alicia Holz:</b>" there full to cap theres only one in town"</blockquote>




Call them. They can make room for you or get you to a different one that does have room.

Quoting Turd Ferguson:" Let me tell you something and this isn't mean in a ignorant way but rather an eye opener. I left my ... [snip!] ... and about to buy my first house. Don't say you can't do it. Because you are capable, if you want it, you can do it."

I quit my job to stay home with my son, and once I wanted to go back to work, it was always a song and dance about how everything would be MY responsibility and he wouldn't help me pull it off


omg my husbands the same way when it comes to this unless i work 90 hrs a week like him and make $17 and hr and about an extra $500 a week cause he owns his own company..then he will help..

<blockquote><b>Quoting Turd Ferguson:</b>" Let me tell you something and this isn't mean in a ignorant way but rather an eye opener. I left my ... [snip!] ... and about to buy my first house. Don't say you can't do it. Because you are capable, if you want it, you can do it."</blockquote>




!!!

Quoting ~Ice Princess~:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Alicia Holz:</b>" there full to cap theres only one in town"</blockquote> ... [snip!] ... one in town"</blockquote> Call them. They can make room for you or get you to a different one that does have room."

  

I would like to say too that leaving him allowed me to meet someone who truly loves me, and my children. I spent a lot of time alone and even though it sucked, it gave me my SO. All the times I spent alone, broke and trying to pull this all off was 100% worth him being in our lives.

It's one thing to make a choice based on what you believe your kids need, and it's another to settle because you don't think you can do it. You can.