Wondering about birth & after the fact.

I don't know what to expect when my son, Jaxon gets here.

I don't know if I should get the epidural..
- I'm a big HUGE baby when it comes to needles! I hate them and I'll do anything not to get a shot. But, I'm an even bigger baby when it comes to pain! But, I heard a lot of bad things about the epidural, that make me not want to get it.. Stuff like, it could kill me.. it could drop my baby's heart rate way down.. it could make me sick.. it could hurt my baby.. I'm just not sure if I could go through all that.. But, I also don't think I could go through all the pain without it..

I was contemplating doing a water birth..
- I've always wanted to do a water birth, because it seemed cooler than a birth out of the water.. Also, when you're in the water, it doesn't hurt as much. As I said in the above paragraph, I'm terrible with pain.. I was just wondering if a water birth would be a good idea?

Is a C-section really that bad?
- People say when you get a C-section that there is this terrible scar for the rest of your life.. Is the scar really that bad? Does it really leave a weird overlapping of the skin? Is it like, nasty to look at? I just don't know. Also, is there ways to prevent having to get the C-section if at all possible? Because I don't want it. I want to have a natural birth..

I don't know if I should breastfeed?
- People say it's a bonding experience, and that you and baby get to know each other better. Not really sure if that's true or not, considering I've never had a kid. But, some people say that some girls can't breastfeed? How do you choose the right formula? How do you choose what is best for your baby? I don't know how to decide..

I don't know if I should put Jaxon in his crib from the start..
- People say that if you don't put kids in their crib from the very beginning that they won't get used to their crib farther down the line. They will get used to it eventually, but, it could take like a month or two.. Should I just start him off in his crib so I don't have to make the transition?

I think that's all my questions as of right now,
if someone could answer them, I would appreciate it.

Thank you.

With the epidural the needle is not bad at all. They do it when you are having a contraction so you don't even really notice, and they numb the spot first. I didn't get the epidural with my second, I got pain meds through the IV, they are nowhere near as good as the epidural but you feel SOOO much better after baby is born. If I ever have more kids I won't get the epidural.

I had an epidural and it sucked. but the person who did it was trying to put it while I was having a contraction. sooo that probably didn't help.

as for bfing. I recommend it. I wasn't "sure" about it either. but it's amazing and sooo much better for the baby and you. it'll help your uterus get back to normal faster, most likely lose weight faster, cheaper, convenient, bonding, and a lot of women don't get their periods while bfing.

as for the after baby decisions, you'll figure it out, just do what you think is best.

I had an "emergency" c-section. It sucked. I tried going all natural and was impressed with myself.

My scar isn't horrible. It's really low in my pubes. I don't have a flap of skin hanging over even though I need to lose about 10 pounds.

My best advice is get a midwife and doula - they empower women to take on birth.

Quoting Kelsey Johnson:" I don't know what to expect when my son, Jaxon gets here. I don't know if I should get the epidural.. ... [snip!] ... I think that's all my questions as of right now, if someone could answer them, I would appreciate it. Thank you."

Epidural-
You don't have to decide now. When you get there, and you know where you are with the pain, then you decide. Inform yourself on the risks and make the decision when you know what it's like.

Water birth-
If you want one, make sure you are birthing in a facility that will do it. Some women love them. They aren't always possible for everyone.

C-section-
Scarring varies. Modern methods have reduced scarring but it still isn't something to take lightly. Induction increases the likelihood of a c-section happening, but you won't really know until you get there.

Breastfeeding-
Try it. Keep an open mind and try it. I believe in my heart that everyone should at least TRY it. Most women CAN do it. It isn't always possible. But most of the time, it is.

Formula-
Some babies require specific formulas but often it is just trial and error. Some people go with whatever the baby was started on at the hospital. Some people go with whatever WIC gives vouchers for. Some go with recommendations from their doctor. You'll have to trial and error and cross that bridge when you come to it.

Crib-
This is very much a personal choice for each parent to make. For me, it worked better to co-sleep, and I don't mind. He's 3 years old now, and I still don't mind. He sleeps half the night in his bed and half the night in mine. It's been like that most of his life. Follow your heart. Either way, promote a safe sleeping environment for baby---no loose blankets, no pillows, etc.

It may not feel like it now, but you'll figure it out.

Epidural: I'm the same as you, absolutely terrified of needles (I mean really bad, they give me horrible anxiety and I avoid them as much as possible) I still opted for the epidural, I got to a point in my labour where getting rid of the pain far outweighed my fear of needles. And maybe it was the pain that made me feel this way but it honestly didn't hurt very much at all. The worst part is the cranking you feel in your back. It didn't completely numb me though only partially on one side so after two epidurals I still felt pretty much smurfing everything. Not going to get into it because I don't want to scare you but labour will probably be the most difficult and painful thing you will ever go through. Play it out when you're in labour and see what you think you need for pain management when you get there is my advice.

C Section: They are a major surgery so yes, they are a big deal. Recovery varies woman to woman but generally I think it's about six weeks. I've heard horror stories but I've also heard pleasantly surprising ones too. A good friend of mine has had two and healed fast with no complications from both.. and her scar isn't bad at all.
Waterbirth: Like a C-Section I've never had one, but I did labour in the tub a lot with DD and it was the best pain relief I had (including nubain and the two epidurals) I hope to have a waterbirth with my next because anything I've seen was very empowering and positive. You will have to check with your hospital though and see if they even offer that option, not all do.
Breastfeeding: No doubt that it is what's most healthy for your baby. It's not easy though and takes a lot of determination especially the first sixish weeks.. if you can stick it out that long you will make it past the hard part and it's pretty smooth sailing from there. At 9 months DD is still on breast (and formula we mix feed) and I wouldn't have it any other way. Definitely not true that girls can't nurse lol don't know what silly person told you that...
Crib sleeping: It is recommended that the baby sleep in a bassinet or crib in your bedroom for the first bit of life. You guys will be up so often anyways that it will be the most convenient. DD sleeps in bed with her daddy and I... we love it but it's not for everyone. If you want to ever have sex in your bed again I don't really suggest it (though if you have a good couch/kitchen table like us you will have no issues  )
Umm think I covered everything lol

Quoting *Zander's mommy*:" With the epidural the needle is not bad at all. They do it when you are having a contraction so you don't ... [snip!] ... as good as the epidural but you feel SOOO much better after baby is born. If I ever have more kids I won't get the epidural."

Not arguing with you, just providing a counterpoint. lol

My epidural was great. The IV meds (demerol, I believe) not only didn't help at all, but they set me to barfing. I think it depends on the person which helps more.

I had a cesarean. It was totally out of my control. I did everything in my power to go natural.

Well I was induced due to my history and I got to 7 cm and stalled. I had gone about 10 drug free having Pitocin induced contractions...yeah it hurt like hell. I dunno how I did it. I will say, if you aren't having an induction the contractions will come more naturally so they shouldn't hurt as bad.

When he was delivered the Dr. discovered his umbilical cord was unusually short so he just couldn't fully descend. A cesarean was inevitable for me.  

Now as far as my recovery went I'm feeling great and I'll be 3 wks postpartum tomorrow. I wasn't in much pain afterwards even during my hospital stay. Night two of my stay they were offering me pain meds and I really didn't even need them but I just took them anyways to help me rest.

Breastfeeding is awesome but is a lot of work. I'd still prefer this over mixing formula, cleaning bottles,etc.

I had a c section with dd#1, got to 6cm stuck and heart rate dropped with each contraction. My epi they gave me to do it I didnt feel becuase of the contraction, but did have lower back pain from the point of injection down, so I wouldnt want to get another.

With dd#2 I went vagnal birth, no meds..did some water time during labor, didnt deliver in water though. It did help since I had nothing to ease the pain otherwise. It really helps.

I LOVE breast feeding! Did it with dd#1 untik a day before her first bday, she is super healthy and helped me attach to her and her to me since I had a c section. It was hard because she was very small (4lbs 15oz) but was so worth it. Im currently breastfeeding dd#2 and still is so amazing. It helps them in so many ways keeping them healthy. My dd#1 has been sick once her entire life (knock on wood) and she is 19mos. I swear by it.

With the crib, I co slept part time and out dd#1 in crib other half. I wanted her to not be completely too dependent on me and wanted her to learn to cope by herself too. With dd#2 I have a king size bed and I sleep alone so I made a spot for her with no pillows or blankets so I co sleep..she has yet to be in her crib.

I had an emergency c section, it was horrible especially healing, the scar isnt bad though. My daughter was in the bassinet next to me for 6 months.  

Thank you, to everyone that gave me advice. I really appreciate it.
(:

You lady's on here are so kind.

/Thanks for posting all these questions! I am having my first, a girl and am due in about a week, since I am measuring ahead, and STILL was not sure about a lot of the stuff you asked. Especially the epidural! I have a million tattoos, needles dont bother me. I could have 20 IVs and be fine. Its the thought of a 'shot' that sends me into an anxiety attack! I had decided on IV drugs and bypassing the Epi, and with the other comments I think I may try to incorporate some form of water labor as well since that seems highly acclaimed. I am breast feeding, one doctor told me that it helps get you to your pre-baby weight faster, you burn up to 1000 calories a day just breast feeding!!  

I plan to co-sleep with my girl just the first couple weeks, or til she starts to sleep better through almost the whole night. I think a lot of what you asked is personal opinion, but I LOVE to get ideas from other people and here suggestions too. It makes your decisions a little easier. Good luck to you! It will all come naturally is what they tell me!

<blockquote><b>Quoting Mercedes Sylvestre:</b>" /Thanks for posting all these questions! I am having my first, a girl and am due in about a week, since ... [snip!] ... suggestions too. It makes your decisions a little easier. Good luck to you! It will all come naturally is what they tell me!"</blockquote>




Just to let you know measuringa week a head does not change your dd lol. A lot of women measure behind and ahead. I did and she came 5 days early.

Quoting Mercedes Sylvestre:" /Thanks for posting all these questions! I am having my first, a girl and am due in about a week, since ... [snip!] ... suggestions too. It makes your decisions a little easier. Good luck to you! It will all come naturally is what they tell me!"

Well, you're welcome. I'm strongly looking into water labor. I'm leaning towards the epidural, because I do have anxiety too. I asked my doctor about my anxiety and she said that it's almost unheard of to do into a full blown panic attack during labor. You have so much adrenaline running through you, that you don't even think about having one. I wish you luck!!