re: How can I talk to him?

Quoting The cry'Baby™:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ♡Noah.:</b>" I did a while back and he said "Well you ... [snip!] ... get help from.the government if the both of you aren't working. but it sounds to me like he isn't going to job center everyday."

I'm not, it's just for fun. And I have no way of knowing if he actually stays there the entire day. I see him go in and then I leave and carry on with my business and etc.

<blockquote><b>Quoting ♡Noah.:</b>" I did a while back and he said "Well you don't have to go. I go by myself."  "</blockquote>




Can you just answer one question for me: why are you still with him if he can't even support you and your baby?? He can't even afford $60 for a "new ID" and you don't have a job.....are you with him for the SOLE reason that he is your BD??? I'm honestly just curious.

Quoting O ♥ G:" Just tell him that obviously his tactic isn't working and that at what 30 something years old? He should ... [snip!] ... forums. This just keeps getting worse and worse. So he cheats, hits, AND is lazy??? Wow, what attracted you to him again?!"

 

When I was on welfare, the job center here in Cali only helped me gain skills to get a job via classes and offered a computer for me to use to look for work. It was a waste of time IMO. I would have him print a resume and put in a little leg work to find a job.

Quoting BαƚMαɳ:" When I was on welfare, the job center here in Cali only helped me gain skills to get a job via classes ... [snip!] ... use to look for work. It was a waste of time IMO. I would have him print a resume and put in a little leg work to find a job."

How long ago was that? I was considering applying for cash aid (I think it's $200 a month?) but they told me I'd have to enroll in this working program to find a real job.

<blockquote><b>Quoting ♡Noah.:</b>" That's what he told me. But it seems off because I got my California ID for only $7 because I got a fee reduction.  "</blockquote>



He's lying. He obviously doesn't give a smurf about you or that baby or he'd be busting his ass to find a job. My dh already had an amazing job but when he found out I was pregnant, he busted his ass to get promoted even though it wasn't even necessary for him too, because that's what MEN do! Oh and my dh is 25 not in his smurfing 30's like your SO.

Quoting ♡Noah.:" How long ago was that? I was considering applying for cash aid (I think it's $200 a month?) but they told me I'd have to enroll in this working program to find a real job. "

Why would that be bad?

Quoting ♡Noah.:" How long ago was that? I was considering applying for cash aid (I think it's $200 a month?) but they told me I'd have to enroll in this working program to find a real job. "

This was 3 years ago. Not much has changed tho. And yes, if you get Cash Aid, you are required to look for work and/or take their classes

Quoting The Doctor:" Why would that be bad?"

It wouldn't accept someone told me they don't really help you at all.

Quoting ♡Noah.:" It wouldn't accept someone told me they don't really help you at all. "

Well.

Seems clear to me. You get the cash aid, take what assistance they can give you in finding a job, and then use your own time to look for a job as well.




Seems pretty silly to pass that up, to me. No one is going to come along and hand you OR your BD a job. You have to put effort into it.

Quoting ♡Noah.:" It wouldn't accept someone told me they don't really help you at all. "

But they will teach you a SKILL. Like as a receptionist, secretary. They will help you learn to type and how to use a computer. Those are skills that would benefit you. It was useless to me because I went to a Technology High School, so those were skills I had learned over the 4 years of my HS career.

Quoting BαƚMαɳ:" But they will teach you a SKILL. Like as a receptionist, secretary. They will help you learn to type ... [snip!] ... useless to me because I went to a Technology High School, so those were skills I had learned over the 4 years of my HS career."

Same here. I already know how to use a computer and how to type. I took typing classes when I was in high school too.

Quoting ♡Noah.:" Same here. I already know how to use a computer and how to type. I took typing classes when I was in high school too. "

That's good and all but can you use PowerPoint? Can you create an entire presentation complete with graphs and charts? Can you use Excel? Access? Word? Those are the kinds of classes they will give you. They will give you $$ to buy interview clothes and help you prepare your resume. It IS beneficial to you.

Quoting BαƚMαɳ:" That's good and all but can you use PowerPoint? Can you create an entire presentation complete with ... [snip!] ... they will give you. They will give you $$ to buy interview clothes and help you prepare your resume. It IS beneficial to you."

Freakin' seriously.

Why wouldn't you try everything, OP??



Sorry to say, but it sounds like you're trying as little as your BD is.

Quoting The Doctor:" Freakin' seriously. Why wouldn't you try everything, OP?? Sorry to say, but it sounds like you're trying as little as your BD is."

These are programs that are in place to help you better your life but you can't expect to sit back and have them do all the work for you. They can only prepare you for the workforce. It's up to you to go out and find the work.