i want a baby...

so, DH knows how bad i want a baby. well we've talked about it, and he's told me he thinks it will be better if we wait a few more yrs. and let me be done with school. okay fine, i dropped it. bc deep down i know we would be BETTER off, but i also know we would be able to take care of another baby now too. so i was just trying to not think about it.

well yesterday, he said "i want a baby" and i said "are you serious? you mean like now?" and he said "yes"

so naturally i got soo excited bc i thought he was finally agreeing to having a baby..

then he says "but we need to wait until you finish school" WTF??   he made me cry - he doesn't know this, bc i was at school and he was texting me.. but still. i don't know if he realizes how much i want a baby, and how much he got my hopes up that we were going to get to have a baby, then he shot me down - it seriously felt like a broken heart when he said that. like it broke my heart that we arent going to get to have a baby...

   

What you want and what you need are two different things.

I think you're Husband is looking out for your best interest, and the family's best interest and you have to appreciate that.

I understand you're hurt but he just sounds like he wants things to be more in place I guess before you make that leap.

Quoting Just Ames:" What you want and what you need are two different things. I think you're Husband is looking out for your best interest, and the family's best interest and you have to appreciate that."

 
My thoughts exactly.

Quoting Just Ames:" What you want and what you need are two different things. I think you're Husband is looking out for your best interest, and the family's best interest and you have to appreciate that."

 

Aww, he shouldn't have said it that way  

Quoting Δ ☮ ∂:" Aww, he shouldn't have said it that way   "

Why though? He should be able to express his feelings too but then also speak on the logical side of it.

Quoting Just Ames:" What you want and what you need are two different things. I think you're Husband is looking out for your best interest, and the family's best interest and you have to appreciate that."

i understand this.. and i get where he's coming from. i just don't know why he would tell me he wants a baby now - and then break my heart saying no we have to wait..

he can just not tell me he wants a baby now, and i'd be ok with it   i think it's just the fact that i've been wanting another baby for a while now, and i understand where he's coming from about me being finished with school first...

he used to tell me he didn't want another baby at all. and that really broke my heart. bc we dont have kids together. he's a step dad to my girls, and i'm a step mom to his daughter. i just want a baby with my husband  

Quoting Just Ames:" Why though? He should be able to express his feelings too but then also speak on the logical side of it. "

Because obviously sending a text that says I want a baby...yes right now is going to get her hopes up. I didn't say he shouldn't be able to express his feelings, it wasn't like a horrible betrayal or anything but I would have kept her feelings in mind when sending it and said I wish we could have our next baby right now not that I want one right now.

Quoting Just Ames:" Why though? He should be able to express his feelings too but then also speak on the logical side of it. "

i think it's just the fact that he said he wanted a baby now, and then said well no, we have to wait.. i love to hear that he wants a baby, but why make me believe we were going to get to have one now? like he could say, baby i love you and i want a baby with you, but i really think we need to wait a little while longer.

He meant that he does want a baby right now but he knows you all shouldn't. He wasn't just suddenly changing his mind real fast.

Quoting Legendary Bonnie Beaver:" He meant that he does want a baby right now but he knows you all shouldn't. He wasn't just suddenly changing his mind real fast. "

i think that's what hurt. bc he never says "i want a baby" so when he said "i want a baby now" i really thought he meant like NOW..   kwim?

Quoting *Amo a Mis Nenas*:" i think that's what hurt. bc he never says "i want a baby" so when he said "i want a baby now" i really thought he meant like NOW..   kwim?"

Yes. I know what you're saying, but I'm sure it's probably hurting him too to want a baby now but know that you all shouldn't have one because you're in school.

Yeah, sending that text was a dick move on his part. But he's right about waiting for a baby.

i want another baby but i gave up asking. i ask him bc i want to know when he would wnat to try and i never got an answer other then yes i want a baby.
he said after Bryson is 1 then he lost his job in Aug 2011 then said we should wait till i get a job, and now he jsuts tells me yes i do want another. He told me i want them to be close in age.
well the gap is pretty small with them being close in age. Bryson will be 2 x-mas eve
i understand where you are both coming from and he shouldnt of texted you like that. he should of talk to you about it bc your hopes are so high then he sends the rest of his sentance and pops your bubble
it sucks I hate that feeling.
i wnat a kid but our relationship needs work.