re: Gone.

Quoting Christina Getty:

I hope it's easier for you to leave than it is for me. From what you described you're in the same boat and I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

Quoting I❤V&B:"

Well, you don't leave, you kick him out!   And you save up before you leave. Make a plan and an "escape plan". I know that there is no abuse, but still do it secretly. Even when you have good times, save up money.

Quoting I❤V&B:" I don't know. My 3 year old adores him but he is the only other person he sees all the time besides ... [snip!] ... and quite a decrease in our food intake. I could possibly lose both of my children. I don't think I can take such a risk. "

well you can always get help from the state. Food stamps and such until you get on your feet if you left. They don't take away children from their mothers unless they are unfit..but I know all that is scary too. Like I said...I did get a full time job so I could feel more financially secure if I did decide to leave. Do you have anyone that could watch your LOs if you were to get a job? If not..we have CCIS which will pay for daycare if you meet the qualifications and if you will be a single mother..you more than likely would.

My dad was like this. My mum should've left him years before she did. I still saw him and stayed with him because she didn't want to take me and my brother through court for custody battles. I'm still to this very day hanging onto the idea that he will one day change and do something for me, and without any motivation or hidden agendas. I took one step, one really small step today and told him I couldn't see him because he didn't fit around my plans. I feel so much better now. The relationship with him was impacting on my relationship with SO and DS and I just felt awful when SO told me. You should leave him for your children's sake as well as your own. My relationship with my dad is so messed up and I wish so much that my mum had left him and taken custody of me and my brother. When I talk about family with anyone, I actually forget about my dad sometimes, and just talk about my mum. I doubt you want your kids to be waiting round for their dad to magically turn into superdad when there is no way he ever will.

I'm not saying that this will happen, this is just how it is with me. But I thought you might want an opinion from someone who has been there as a child too. Good luck with whatever you decide

Quoting Christina Getty:" well you can always get help from the state. Food stamps and such until you get on your feet

I forgot all about government assistance! Yes, that would be good!

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