How can i help my child?

My oldest's son's father is in and out of his life. They only time he see's him is when I'm the one who suggest it. I tired talking to him but he's a ass. My son is acting out for this reason. In school his behavior is HORRIBLE!! I did put him in karate and i'm hoping that will help him out. He was on punishment (no tv, after home work he had to work in his work book or just read book and early bed time). He needs to know he can't act like that. But how else do help him fix his behavior without the help of his sperm donor?

Behavioral specialist or counselor maybe?

Put him in counseling... if he's young they have family therapy... we have my son in counseling for other reasons... he's 6 and it seems to be helping...

My father died when I was 3 and at age 9 I started flipping out, I started counseling to help me start to grieve his death...

It sounds like he needs a positive older male role-model figure to look up to. Do you have a brother, or your father, a cousin, uncle or someone who could be that for your son? Someone who takes the time, at least once in a while, to talk to him, play with him, and give him attention. Your son might have abandonment issues or feel that he's not good enough for his sperm-donor father, so be sure to ask someone who has a permanent relationship with you and won't just up and leave. Also, if there are kids his age in your family (cousins perhaps) that he could meet and get together to play with, it might help him know that he is not alone, especially if there is a boy his age.

My ex bf and youngest son's father is in his life and there for Zay. He takes him to school and karate class a lot. He talks to him but i think Zay looks at his as kJ father and not his. I've been looking for a therapist but the ones ppl have told me are really great don't take my insurance. I'm still looking into that though. hopefully i can find something soon. I don't want my son to continue this behavior.

He has cousins on his father side his age that are boys but He doesn't see them that often because his father doesn't get him. I know he needs boys to play with his age as well. It hurts that my son is hurting and the person who can fix it won't.

<blockquote><b>Quoting ButterflyTats:</b>" My ex bf and youngest son's father is in his life and there for Zay. He takes him to school and karate ... [snip!] ... I'm still looking into that though. hopefully i can find something soon. I don't want my son to continue this behavior. "</blockquote>




Dean was like that for a while with my husband... my husband finally had to sit him down and tell him, "He was his son too... even if he wasn't blood he still loved him the same as maks and jade" *his kids with me*
It got to the point where they were both crying, but that's what dean needs to hear, and so does ur son, he could be feeling left out because ur other child has his father in its life...

Quoting DeanJade&Maksims Momma:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ButterflyTats:</b>" My ex bf and youngest son's father is in ... [snip!] ... what dean needs to hear, and so does ur son, he could be feeling left out because ur other child has his father in its life..."

That sounds like a good idea. I'll talk to my ex and see if he will do that. I know he will. He's a smurffy bf but a great dad.

<blockquote><b>Quoting ButterflyTats:</b>" That sounds like a good idea. I'll talk to my ex and see if he will do that. I know he will. He's a smurffy bf but a great dad."</blockquote>




It sucks that kids have to go through this... but once ur son feels like he has some1 too, that loves him and he can confide in, it will help with his esteem issues,
Maybe its not who he *wants* or *needs* but its some1 and ur son will figure out that he is just as important and loved because some 1 even tho he isnt his bio dad, loves him and that's just as special because he's choosing to love him  
My sons 6 how olds urs?? Extra curic. Activites are a great idea, were signing dean up for parkour training, to get some aggression and energy out, he has adhd...