re: Is it ever your place... *discipline D&D*

Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The TTC Queen Bee:</b>" Uh they ARE just kids, they don't naturally ... [snip!] ... now and has her own cage of three rats in her room. Undisciplined kids are monsters and that's why I usually only like my own."

I agree. It can all be prevented if the parent actually does something to correct the behavior. This is a prime example of lazy parenting.

Quoting The TTC Queen Bee:" Uh they ARE just kids, they don't naturally know better they have to be taught and disciplined. The ... [snip!] ... girls do. If she doesn't want that kid at her house that is fine but to call him a monster is terrible. 3 is still very young."

I DID say she worded it in a way that I disagree with. Trust me, the kid isn't a monster, but everything can't be dismissed by saying 'they're just kids'. I've never seen a child over the age of 2 who DID NOT know that they were hurting an animal when they were rough. I have seen kids just laugh about it, and I do think a lot of it is the parent's fault. But after a certain age, kids DO have a sense of right and wrong, and can go against the way they were raised.

Does it excuse a child who was in a non-discipline home when he kills a family pet by accident? Or seriously injures or even, god forbid, kills a playmate or sibling, for being too rough? There IS a line, and it should be drawn when a living creature is getting hurt.

Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The TTC Queen Bee:</b>" Uh they ARE just kids, they don't naturally ... [snip!] ... now and has her own cage of three rats in her room. Undisciplined kids are monsters and that's why I usually only like my own."

 


I agree. It's not their fault they're brats, but sorry, some kids are still brats nonetheless.

Quoting Destinite:" I agree. It can all be prevented if the parent actually does something to correct the behavior. This is a prime example of lazy parenting. "

 
This too.
I believe kids actually want structure and discipline, though of course, they don't actively realize that's what they want. That's why the test boundaries and limits, to see when mom will finally draw the line. Lots of moms don't, so kids go over the top and act out in big ways, constantly testing the waters.

Quoting khigh:" <blockquote><b>Quoting The TTC Queen Bee:</b>" Uh they ARE just kids, they don't naturally ... [snip!] ... now and has her own cage of three rats in her room. Undisciplined kids are monsters and that's why I usually only like my own."

Well your daughter has been raised around them! She has been taught how to handle them, etc. Why would you expect the same from other kids? Sounds like your kid is very mature, not all kids are though, sorry. I know several 3 year olds, some are still practically babies and others are much more mature, all kids are different dear. You go ahead thinking they're monsters though. Wow.

Quoting The TTC Queen Bee:" Well your daughter has been raised around them! She has been taught how to handle them, etc. Why would ... [snip!] ... babies and others are much more mature, all kids are different dear. You go ahead thinking they're monsters though. Wow."

I wasn't raised around babies, but I still knew by instinct that you had to be gentle with them and loving and sweet to them. I wasn't raised around hamsters but I still knew to be very gentle with them.

Quoting K. P. Walsh:"   This too. I believe kids actually want structure and discipline, though of course, they don't actively ... [snip!] ... finally draw the line. Lots of moms don't, so kids go over the top and act out in big ways, constantly testing the waters. "

It really makes me sad. Kids thrive when they are disciplined properly.
They depend on us to teach, guide and correct them.

Quoting The TTC Queen Bee:" Well your daughter has been raised around them! She has been taught how to handle them, etc. Why would ... [snip!] ... babies and others are much more mature, all kids are different dear. You go ahead thinking they're monsters though. Wow."

You definitely have a point. But whether or not your children are raised around animals, if you show your children love, tenderness, affection and gentleness, they tend to exhibit it themselves in small things as instinct, you know? My niece has no pets, but knew instinctively to be gentle and kind to my pets. Now, she is a girl and I think little girls are more sensitive, little boys tend to be a little rougher, so you have a point there.

Quoting ☾BizzyBee♉:" I DID say she worded it in a way that I disagree with. Trust me, the kid isn't a monster, but everything ... [snip!] ... a playmate or sibling, for being too rough? There IS a line, and it should be drawn when a living creature is getting hurt."

I'm don't excuse the kids behavior because he is a kid, obviously he has to be shaped by someone. Kids shouldn't just get away with things because they're young that's not what I'm saying. I have definitely seen kids over the age of 2 who know nothing about animals and did not understand they were hurting an animal. If a kid hasn't been around animals then how would they know how to treat them? I have seen kids purposely be mean to an animal but not at the age of 3, I can't imagine that is was done on purpose. If a kid were to kill an animal on accident, is that ok? No. But a kid that is being supervised cannot kill anything... I would put more blame on the parents than the kid.

Quoting ☾BizzyBee♉:" I wasn't raised around babies, but I still knew by instinct that you had to be gentle with them and ... [snip!] ... gentle with them and loving and sweet to them. I wasn't raised around hamsters but I still knew to be very gentle with them. "

Good for you? That is DEFINITELY not all kids. That is just a fact. Not everyone has those instincts.

Quoting K. P. Walsh:" You definitely have a point. But whether or not your children are raised around animals, if you show ... [snip!] ... she is a girl and I think little girls are more sensitive, little boys tend to be a little rougher, so you have a point there. "

Yes most boys are much more rough, VERY different from girls. My friends who have boys do nothing but show them love and affection, etc. They are still rough and crazy. Not all kids are just sweet and perfect haha. My friends 3 year old boy was just over here and kept tackling my dog and made her cry. He was trying to play with her, he didn't understand it hurt her. I got him to stop and understand without spanking him...

Quoting The TTC Queen Bee:" Good for you? That is DEFINITELY not all kids. That is just a fact. Not everyone has those instincts."

And that does not excuse the child. If they HURT something, or someone, that child should not get a free pass because "Oh well they weren't raised to know better." We sure don't give the murderers in jail that free pass.

Most children over the age of 2 know that throwing a baby kitten will equal hurting the kitten. 3 year olds ARE capable of being mean just because, they aren't itty bitty babies anymore. They are more than capable of not harming others OR breaking/messing with things that do not belong to them.

If someone's kid was doing that in my home, I'd kick them out of my home and tell them to come back when they can reign in their kid.

Quoting ☾BizzyBee♉:" And that does not excuse the child. If they HURT something, or someone, that child should not get a ... [snip!] ... kid was doing that in my home, I'd kick them out of my home and tell them to come back when they can reign in their kid. "

Did I say they get a free pass because of it? No. I just said it doesn't make them a monster, I'm giving the kid the benefit of the doubt that he is not doing it intentionally and I'm saying he clearly needs discipline. If I thought a kid was intentionally hurting one of my animals I wouldn't want him in my house either, which I already said.

Quoting The TTC Queen Bee:" Did I say they get a free pass because of it? No. I just said it doesn't make them a monster, I'm giving ... [snip!] ... If I thought a kid was intentionally hurting one of my animals I wouldn't want him in my house either, which I already said."

And I also said the kid is not a monster, so why are we arguing that fact? I just keep saying that the kid should not get away with it because they do not know better.

But I do think that some kids, yes, even at age 3, are capable of hurting another creature JUST to hurt them. Some kids ARE just mean. That's where you get bullies. If shoveling truckloads of love on kids made them all gentle all the time, we'd have less bullies in the world and schools would be better for kids. But no, you can be from a loving home and still want to hurt others. Some kids are just mean.

Quoting ☾BizzyBee♉:" And I also said the kid is not a monster, so why are we arguing that fact? I just keep saying that the ... [snip!] ... schools would be better for kids. But no, you can be from a loving home and still want to hurt others. Some kids are just mean."

And I keep saying they shouldn't just get away with it. I never said that. They need to be disciplined.
I guess I have just never met one of these kids you are referring to...