”I finally realized that being grateful to my body was key to giving more love to myself.”
Oprah Winfrey


Russian artist Mashkov "On the beach. Hurzuf" (1926).






Bonus:

Love love love. I especially love the photo. There's too much skinny hate too. Just like I hate being told to go to a gym, skinny girls hate being told to eat a cheese burger. We don't know their story just like they don't know ours. We don't know if they just have a fast metabolism or a health issue etc. Just because our bodies aren't a "perfect" weight doesn't mean we don't deserve love!

I've been curious for a long time, Just don't know how to word it at all.. so this is my best attempt. Im not trying to be rude.


You are always posting about being fat and happy, and how fat is healthy (when everyone that isn't in denial knows that fat=unhealthy, heavy can equal healthy as long as your body fat percentage is in a good range and you lean body mass is high, this is the only way heavy is healthy) But besides that..

Are you happy that you're fat or have you 'given up' and decided to just be fat, come to terms with it and be happy?

Like if you were just chubby, slightly overweight would you be unhappy and try to become fat?

I understand we should all love our bodies, But it's being healthy and giving our bodies good food and regular exercise the best way we could love our bodies??

Honestly not trying to be rude. I just hope you haven't given up on yourself.. and let yourself be fat and 'happy'.

Quoting Aspen & Jaxon's Mommy TTC:" I've been curious for a long time, Just don't know how to word it at all.. so this is my best attempt. ... [snip!] ... bodies?? Honestly not trying to be rude. I just hope you haven't given up on yourself.. and let yourself be fat and 'happy'."

I hope she doesn't mind me somewhat answering this, and please this is just my perspective: from what I know of her she promotes a "Health and Every Size" movement. Meaning, fat doesn't necessarily equal unhealthy.

To me, this means that I can be fat (because I am) and happy with my body and the way I look. I've always tried to see my body for what it can do, not what it looks like. I'll most likely never be skinny. Even at my thinest I was overweight. I am now obese. I've gotten tired of trying to beat my body into submission as to what will fit society's standards of beauty. I am HAPPY with my body for what it can do. I take care of my body. Why should I not? Why should I accept your perspective that I am unhealthy just because my body doesn't reflect what my lifestyle is?

Quoting Aspen & Jaxon's Mommy TTC:" I've been curious for a long time, Just don't know how to word it at all.. so this is my best attempt. ... [snip!] ... bodies?? Honestly not trying to be rude. I just hope you haven't given up on yourself.. and let yourself be fat and 'happy'."

You have a asked a very multifaceted question so I'll just break it up and try to answer you the best I can. I'll take it step by step.

"I've been curious for a long time, Just don't know how to word it at all.. so this is my best attempt. Im not trying to be rude."

I always find statements like "I'm not trying to be rude" to be amusing... because you know something is coming and you should brace yourself. I'm not questioning your intentions, but for reals! lol  

"You are always posting about being fat and happy, and how fat is healthy (when everyone that isn't in denial knows that fat=unhealthy, heavy can equal healthy as long as your body fat percentage is in a good range and you lean body mass is high, this is the only way heavy is healthy) But besides that.. "

First of all, I have never said fat is healthy. Those words have never left my mouth (unless we are talking about dietary fat, I have said that. Except for transfat which is the devil of fat imo). Fat, in and of itself, does not determine health. Suggesting that everyone who isn't in denial knows that fat=unhealthy is suggesting something about the mental health of those that question the equation seems like an accusation towards anyone who challenges the popular anecdotal wisdom of society. I could be wrong. Anyways... I do not believe that fat automatically equals unhealthy. I believe that activity levels are a more accurate predictor of health. Studies like the one cited in this article support the notion. There is also some interesting research cited in junkfood science's obesity paradox series that bring up some interesting queries.

The fat=unhealthy theory also suggest that thin=healthy... which we know to be fallacy. Visceral fat, fat around the organs, can be found in a person of any size. Visceral fat is burned off by physical activity... so a fat person can have significantly less visceral fat than an inactive thin person.

I'm not in denial. I actually like to research and study. It took a great deal of evidence to persuade me to look at this issue in a new light.

So, in short, I do not think that fat=healthy but I do not think that fat automatically equals unhealthy either.

"Are you happy that you're fat or have you 'given up' and decided to just be fat, come to terms with it and be happy?"

I am neither happy that I'm fat nor have I given up on myself.

I am fat AND happy, not fat THUS happy. It is a phrase that points to the fact that I can be both concurrently. If my body decides to lose weight then I would be cool with that. I'm not against weight loss, but I am against dieting (for myself) because I feel that dieting is detrimental to my health (physical, emotional, and spiritual). 95-98% of those who lose a significant amount of weight gain it back, many adding even more pounds than they started with. Yo-yo dieting can actually lead to worse health outcomes. Just for an example: Obese women whose weight fluctuates are 4x more likely to have hypertension than obese women who have weights that remain relatively constant.

"Like if you were just chubby, slightly overweight would you be unhappy and try to become fat?"

I've already kind of answered this. I'm going to trust my body to gravitate towards a weight that is more healthy for me by practicing a healthy lifestyle. I'm not concerned about what size that is. Fat or thin or whatever is fine with me.

"I understand we should all love our bodies, But it's being healthy and giving our bodies good food and regular exercise the best way we could love our bodies??"

There is no right way to have a body. Everyone can do with their body as they see fit. The best way for one person to love their body is not going to be the same way another person loves theirs. I value the freedom of that. I don't believe in putting qualifiers on self-love and self-acceptance. I try not to "should" on people.

"Honestly not trying to be rude. I just hope you haven't given up on yourself.. and let yourself be fat and 'happy'."

Once again, I have not given up on myself.

I do practice Health at Every Size (HAES)
The principles are as follows:

1. Accept your size. Love and appreciate the body you have. Self-acceptance empowers you to move on and make positive changes.
2. Trust yourself. We all have internal systems designed to keep us healthy—and at a healthy weight. Support your body in naturally finding its appropriate weight by honoring its signals of hunger, fullness, and appetite.
3. Adopt healthy lifestyle habits. Develop and nurture connections with others and look for purpose and meaning in your life. Fulfilling your social, emotional, and spiritual needs restores food to its rightful place as a source of nourishment and pleasure.
• Find the joy in moving your body and becoming more physically vital in your everyday life.
• Eat when you're hungry, stop when you're full, and seek out pleasurable and satisfying foods.
• Tailor your tastes so that you enjoy more nutritious foods, staying mindful that there is plenty of room for less nutritious choices in the context of an overall healthy diet and lifestyle.
4. Embrace size diversity. Humans come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Open to the beauty found across the spectrum and support others in recognizing their unique attractiveness.
http://education.nationalgeographic.com/education/news/health-every-size/?ar_a=1



Even though I am pursuing health by using HAES, I do not think it is a necessary action for one to love and accept oneself.

Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:" I hope she doesn't mind me somewhat answering this, and please this is just my perspective: from what ... [snip!] ... I not? Why should I accept your perspective that I am unhealthy just because my body doesn't reflect what my lifestyle is?"

I don't mind you answering at all!  

Quoting Fat-and-Happy:" You have a asked a very multifaceted question so I'll just break it up and try to answer you the best ... [snip!] ... Even though I am pursuing health by using HAES, I do not think it is a necessary action for one to love and accept oneself."

vws! idk why loving your body the way it is = giving up on yourself. Being the best you is a very personal experience and doesnt need someone else to dictate what that is.

Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:" vws! idk why loving your body the way it is = giving up on yourself. Being the best you is a very personal experience and doesnt need someone else to dictate what that is."

Cause thats how I see it for myself.. I was just curious.

I myself am overweight and not happy about it at all.. I just hired a personal trainer to help me change it, I was at the point of giving up tho and just living with it, But something in me snapped and I HAD to get to the gym.

Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:" vws! idk why loving your body the way it is = giving up on yourself. Being the best you is a very personal experience and doesnt need someone else to dictate what that is."

I'm not sure either, but it is a popular perspective. It has brought me many accusations like those that proclaim that I'm promoting obesity or I'm giving fat people permission to be unhealthy.

Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:" vws! idk why loving your body the way it is = giving up on yourself. Being the best you is a very personal experience and doesnt need someone else to dictate what that is."

Agreed.

Why should I hate myself just because I'm fat. Why does society say I'm not allowed to love myself regardless? I'm smurfing awesome. I don't care that my body isn't what society deems perfect. I hate society anyway.

BECAUSE I love myself I am treating my body better. I'm eating healthier, being more active, etc. Back when I hated myself I ate like smurf and did nothing to better myself. You HAVE to love yourself to get healthier. Yeah, there are women who hate themselves and lose the weight, but VERY rarely they lose it in a healthy way.

Quoting Aspen & Jaxon's Mommy TTC:" Cause thats how I see it for myself.. I was just curious. I myself am overweight and not happy about ... [snip!] ... it, I was at the point of giving up tho and just living with it, But something in me snapped and I HAD to get to the gym. "

I used to see it that way too. Then after a year + trying to "change" the way my body just is I was like WTF. I realized I was trying to change my body looks, not nurture what my body is. It just made me feel more horrible until I changed my mindset that my body is fine and my intentions were wrong. Not saying yours are, this is just the way I saw myself.

For me, loving my body gives me permission to take care of it the way it should be. I exercise, I eat in moderation, and, frankly, I kick ass in my body. The way that it looks is no reflection of what it's capable of.

Quoting Aspen & Jaxon's Mommy TTC:" Cause thats how I see it for myself.. I was just curious. I myself am overweight and not happy about ... [snip!] ... it, I was at the point of giving up tho and just living with it, But something in me snapped and I HAD to get to the gym. "

I had a personal trainer once (I had won 4 free sessions with him). He tried to kill me because he saw that I could bust out some push-up and crunches better than some of the (his words) "skinny girls who he started training".... Anyways, one time at the gym my back spazzed out and he had to roll me around on an exercise ball to work it out... I'm sure it was quite the spectacle lol. After he was through with me I avoided the gym for awhile... haha

Quoting Aspen & Jaxon's Mommy TTC:" Cause thats how I see it for myself.. I was just curious. I myself am overweight and not happy about ... [snip!] ... it, I was at the point of giving up tho and just living with it, But something in me snapped and I HAD to get to the gym. "

See, the thing is that you can be happy, and still change. I'm losing weight, but I'm doing it by treating my body differently. Even if I never lost another lb, I'd eat right and exercise because it's good for my body. You can have a trainer at the gym and still be happy and content with yourself.

I don't need hate or unhappiness to "punish" me into adopting healthy habits. I do those things now because I appreciate everything my body can do and I want to treat it right, even if I don't lose anything else.

You can focus on being healthy without focusing on weight (granted it CAN be a factor for people, but you don't have to hate it).

Quoting she nan igans:" See, the thing is that you can be happy, and still change. I'm losing weight, but I'm doing it by treating ... [snip!] ... can focus on being healthy without focusing on weight (granted it CAN be a factor for people, but you don't have to hate it)."

Exercise should never be a punsihment, IMO. It creates an unhealthy relationship with something that is just soooo good for us.

Quoting Fatty McRunnerPants:" Exercise should never be a punsihment, IMO. It creates an unhealthy relationship with something that is just soooo good for us."

Exactly. It should be exciting to see if you can run further, lift more. It should be exciting to see your body changing and appreciate what it can do rather then exercising to punish it because it doesn't fit the mold you think it should.