Ladies, I need advice or something?...

Or anyone who's experienced this or know where I'm coming from....Anyway t
Here goes my rant...

So lately I feel like all my husband and I do is argue...& it's over the dumbest things!...like mainly, it seems to be me. He asks me to do something and apparently I respond like an smurf. I don't think I am at all.
Everyone tells me I deserve better and that he's such an ass, but I just make up excuses. Apart of me thinks its because he's in between jobs so being around each other 24/7 so maybe we're just annoyed each other?
I always tell him he isn't romantic enough or all lovey dovey and he tells me to get over it. I feel like nothing I do is right and in the end I'm the smurf or the bitch. He has a very short fuse and a bad temper so I feel like I have to walk on egg shells around him because if I say the wrong thing, I'm stupid or a bitch.
I tell him I'm not an smurf and he is..he replies with, "You just don't know how to recognize when you're being an smurf."
I'm guilty of letting him walk all over me because I hate being screamed at, I just cave and get silent.
Also, anytime 1 single guy likes a photo of mine on FB he asks like a million questions and why they liked it. When I walk up out of the living room to go to another room he asks where I am going or what I'm doing. For instance, one time I walked up to go pee and he asked what I was doing and I did respond with an attitude that I was just going pee and to chill out.
& if I get on the computer in the front room he asks me why Im getting on the computer and what I'm doing. He has no reason to worry. He's the only 1 in the relationship who's been caught talking to a girl in a way that's wrong.

I just want to be happy in life. It's hard for, especially since we live together I'm the only one who takes care of our son. He just takes care of him financially.

My parents don't like him. I'm tired of hearing them bicker and my husband saying he hopes I grow up and M nothing like her.

We've only been married for almost 2years and I don't want this fail, but I feel like in his mind he's doing nothing wrong.

sorry that was long and sorry for any spelling errors. Typing on the iPod sucks lol

Sounds similar to my situation. I DO think that being in between jobs is part of it. Its frustrating being together 24/7 especially when one person is doing substantially more than the other. That and kids. Kids make everything so difficult. I dont have any advice...but you arent alone. Marriage isnt always easy, and you will have rough patches but thats not a reason to throw it all away ya know?

girl you and me are in the same damn boat! i swear our men are so much a like its scary! Does he call you stupid, smurf & bitch often? SO doesnt he will tell me to shut up or jsut blame me fore everything! if you wnat to talk pm or in my pt or we can do it in here i dont care...


i know the job can put stress on them and trust me i can see it with SO since hes started working. his fuse is even shorter but im going to talk to him about it.. tell him he has to go to councling or anger managment. he needs help and i cant do it for him. Have you two gone to couple councling yet?

We haven't seeked any profectional help, but I feel like when need it. He probably refuse to go. It's like my feelings don't matter. In just tired of just sucking it up. Yes, I do say or ask dumb stuff sometimes, but it doesn't mean you have the right to degrade me or call me names. He constantly does it in front of our son and I tell him to not do that and just says "so what" or "I don't care" and it makes him more angry. I hope when he starts working again it isn't like this anymore. He's told me on numerous occasions that if it wasnt for Mason he wouldn't be with me. Granted he was drunk when he's said it, but that's when the truth comes out, right?

I know that he's not perfect and neither am I, but as a female I crave the feeling of being wanted and attention. As in being told every once in awhile that I look nice. I tell him he looks nice more than he tells me lol.

SO two times when he was plastered basically was breaking up with me. its horribl feeling. what did he say about it when he was sober?
i honestly think you two need professional help! if he wants the marriage to work he will do what it takes.

He's abusive. What he is doing is being emotionally and mentally abusive. You said it yourself you just shut up and take it cause you don't wanna be screamed at. He's trying to control you. That is not normal behavior.

It's really hard to work on a relationship when one person refuses to admit their faults. You have to have communication & compromise.

Usually when someone is all over your ass like that convinced you are doing something, it's because they are.

You two sound so much like me and my DH. Except, in my case, it was my DH who got sacked and I'm still working. He's not used to being a SAHP at all, he's used to working all the time, and he's down my throat constantly about everything. Everything from I'm not helping clean, which I admit I don't help during the week, but on my days off, I will clean. When I was a SAHM, all he did was sit around after work, and wouldn't even help on his days off, and now, he still expects me to do everything. He is drawing unemployment which is helping out a little but we're still struggling. And on top of everything, I found out he cheated. We decided to try to work things out, but now anytime I so much as glance at a guy, he goes bananas. He's convinced I'm going to do something with someone else because he did. That's what men do, think the worst of us and are convinced we're going to wrong them in any way. That's why your man is acting this way towards you. Because he's scared you're going to do the same thing he did. My advice to you is to get out off the house and find a job, and maybe he'll follow in your footsteps.

I'm glad I'm not alone in this. My parents tell me all the time that he feels like he needs to have control of me. They fear when we and if we move out of state he will try to keep me in doors and not let me do anything.

I now rely on him anyway. We sold my car for extra money. I ended up getting 4k and out of that 4k I saw 300$ of it. I was given the check and he told me how much I was going to get out of it.

It's like when I mention something is like we're so broke, but when it's something he wants (for his car or bike) that's 200+$ we can afford it. I mean after all it is his money, but still.

I can't ever just relax or have time to myself except for while Mason is sleeping or napping. However my husband spends several hours playing computer games and when I have something I want to do and need him to keep and eye on Mason he comes up with an excuse as to why he can't.

I'd eventually like another child and he says never, even though I'd then get suck watching 2 kids 24/7. It's just annoys me

I wish he would understand that he's at fault too and it's not just all me.

& Everytime he accuses me of being shady I always ask him if he's the one hiding something. (I had an ex who would cheat on me then accuse me of it because he felt guilty on the inside so in return treated me like smurf)

Ugh I don't get guys!!! Maybe I will find my son another mommy. HAHA

No, it sounds like you need to find your son another daddy because he's not ready

Quoting OhSoFKN Fabulous:" Or anyone who's experienced this or know where I'm coming from...Anyways t Here goes my rant... So lately ... [snip!] ... in his mind he's doing nothing wrong. sorry that was long and sorry for any spelling errors. Typing on the iPod sucks lol"

im in the same spot
im choosing to leave im going to a sub housing shelter tomorrow tonight im at my moms. he seems to blame me for everythng he calls me name i made him do it we fight i started then im a bitch whore dumb stupid retard lazy i do nothing I dont care all i used him was to have kids with and blah blah the list goes on. i let my self depend on him so much and now i feel like i have no way out but a shelter so that where im off to. Im tired of the arguing. Im tired of always saying im the wrongful one and making him miserable and the problem and so if im the problem im going to leave see if mayb he'll change

<blockquote><b>Quoting mama is write:</b>" No, it sounds like you need to find your son another daddy because he's not ready"</blockquote>




No, I didn't mean another mommy as in replacing me. I jokingly meant,guys suck maybe instead of another daddy he will have 2 Mommys lol.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Blah blah F-U:</b>" im in the same spot im choosing to leave im going to a sub housing shelter tomorrow tonight im at ... [snip!] ... the wrongful one and making him miserable and the problem and so if im the problem im going to leave see if mayb he'll change "</blockquote>




You're so strong for that and I respect you for recognizing it was problem and having the strength to remove yourself from it. I can imagine it takes a lot.

¬ to make it confusing to anyone he is still getting a paycheck. He just got out of the Coast Guard, so he's currently in the process of finding a good job.
I just rely on him because I literally have nothing. I share his car, but I have to ask him and normally he says I can.

I'm just sick of being told in lieing about stuff when I'm not.
It's hard because I just can't find my voice. I've been verbally and mentally abused by 1 guy too many that I'm just used to getting walked over.
I think what makes this case different is the fact we're married and have a child together.

Quoting OhSoFKN Fabulous:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Blah blah F-U:</b>" im in the same spot im choosing to leave ... [snip!] ... just used to getting walked over. I think what makes this case different is the fact we're married and have a child together."

its hard but if he is walking all over u its not good I have to little ones 10 months and 2 years old and im lost and hurtto think im leaving an hoping this opens up his eye to chane and see what he does. i depended on him a lot and it sucks because when i wanna leave i leave with nothng no money no car nothing just my clothes n kids

Quoting OhSoFKN Fabulous:" <blockquote><b>Quoting mama is write:</b>" No, it sounds like you need to find your ... [snip!] ... mean another mommy as in replacing me. I jokingly meant,guys suck maybe instead of another daddy he will have 2 Mommys lol."

lol