Forums > Sex & RelationshipsPage 1 <> 9by: BG Secrets

re: I cheated

posted 1st Oct
<blockquote><b>Quoting BG Secrets:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Mel & a girl named Pey:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ... [snip!] ... expressions and not through inflection in voice or body language. I don't understand sarcasm or when people express themselves."</blockquote>



Well I really think you should see your therapist. She might help you sort things out when things get confusing. Mr x doesn't sound like the right path. I think you need to find happiness alone before with anyone else. Definitely with out DH cuz he isn't helping for sure.
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I have 2 kids & 2 angel babies & live in Houston, Texas
posted 1st Oct
<blockquote><b>Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:</b>" That's a good idea. Hopefully it'll help you out. Do you think maybe you did it so you COULD show some ... [snip!] ... If that makes sense. If your life with your husband is so blah, maybe you ventured out as a way of self medicating almost?"</blockquote>




He has also been diagnosed with aspergers. It takes a lot and I mean a lot for either of us to show any emotions. I have no highs and no lows. Everything is blah. I had a rush of emotions last night and it felt good. What doesn't feel good is the no guilt.
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I live in Arizona
posted 1st Oct
<blockquote><b>Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:</b>" Therapy helps a lot though. Ignoring it won't do anything. My mom works with a lot of autistic/aspergers ... [snip!] ... Hell, something as small as cutting gluten out of your diet can help with aspergers. Idk, I just think it's worth a shot. "</blockquote>


My bro has aspergers...sometimes removing gluten is impossible. My brother is VERY picky
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I have 2 kids & 2 angel babies & live in Houston, Texas
posted 1st Oct
Quoting Mel & a girl named Pey:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:</b>" Therapy helps a lot though. Ignoring ... [snip!] ... worth a shot. "</blockquote> My bro has aspergers...sometimes removing gluten is impossible. My brother is VERY picky"

I realize that. Not everything works for everyone.
My cousin has it. They cut Gluten out of her diet, expensive, but worth it.
She's a whole new kid. She went from freaking out any time someone made eye contact with her to coming up to me and everyone else at Christmas and showing us magic tricks.   Pretty awesome stuff.
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I have 1 child & live in Indiana
posted 1st Oct
<blockquote><b>Quoting Mel & a girl named Pey:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting BG Secrets:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Mel & a ... [snip!] ... path. I think you need to find happiness alone before with anyone else. Definitely with out DH cuz he isn't helping for sure."</blockquote>




I'm going to tell him tonight, but I'm not going to tell him who I was with. That would ruin so many lives. X would lose his business and DH would be very upset. I don't know if he would care so much about the cheating as he would knowing that it was with someone he knows so well.
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I live in Arizona
posted 1st Oct
Quoting BG Secrets:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:</b>" That's a good idea. Hopefully it'll ... [snip!] ... and no lows. Everything is blah. I had a rush of emotions last night and it felt good. What doesn't feel good is the no guilt."

That was more what I meant. It was nice to feel emotions again, which makes you want to continue.
I still say therapy is a good idea. It can't hurt anything to at least try. I'm sure you don't want to continue living your life like this.
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I have 1 child & live in Indiana
posted 1st Oct
Quoting BG Secrets:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Just Ames:</b>" OK then I assume your kid(s) are under 10 years ... [snip!] ... hate admitting it to myself, but sometimes I feel like my life would have been completely different if I didn't have children."


When SO and I split last year, he had him 50% of the time. I went out all the time, partied, got drunk, had random hook ups, went to the casino, etc etc etc.
After a month or two it got really old and I just wanted DS back 100% of the time.

Sometimes especially when you get married and pregnant young, you need a break to figure out what you really want. I didnt have a break, because I still had DS 4 days and 3 nights a week(I was working the other 4 nights until 2am but I was bartending at a strip club so it was mostly just partying while I made money).

But my point is the split will be good for many reasons. You don't want to be with your husband anymore, and you will get some small breaks from being a full time mom as well.

GL!
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I have 2 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Enfield, Connecticut
posted 1st Oct
<blockquote><b>Quoting BG Secrets:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting Mel & a girl named Pey:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ... [snip!] ... upset. I don't know if he would care so much about the cheating as he would knowing that it was with someone he knows so well."</blockquote>


I think it takes guys to admit it so good job. All else aside fine a way to be happy without anyone...there is no guarantee we will always have someone there to help with that part of life.

Guts not guys lol
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I have 2 kids & 2 angel babies & live in Houston, Texas
posted 1st Oct
I'm going to call my therapist and talk to her before DH gets home and that would be great if she doesn't ask details because she knows x also. What I really want to do is call x but I know that's probably not a good idea.

He's been texting me asking where I want to go. I want to run away, but I know that's also probably not a good idea.
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I live in Arizona
posted 1st Oct
Quoting BG Secrets:" I'm going to call my therapist and talk to her before DH gets home and that would be great if she doesn't ... [snip!] ... idea. He's been texting me asking where I want to go. I want to run away, but I know that's also probably not a good idea."
No, it's not.
And you're therapist shouldn't expect you to name drop either.
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I have 2 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Montego Bay, Jamaica
posted 1st Oct
I'm not sure where this conversation has went. But, just remind yourself WHY you married your DH.
and then decide if you guys should work on things or not.
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I have 11 kids & live in Tulsa, Oklahoma
posted 1st Oct
Quoting BG Secrets:" I'm going to call my therapist and talk to her before DH gets home and that would be great if she doesn't ... [snip!] ... idea. He's been texting me asking where I want to go. I want to run away, but I know that's also probably not a good idea."

You're right, both of those are bad ideas.

And anything you tell her should be completely confidential, she can get in a lot of trouble for leaking anything. Not that giving her a name is necessary at all.
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I have 1 child & live in Indiana
posted 1st Oct
<blockquote><b>Quoting BG Secrets:</b>" I'm going to call my therapist and talk to her before DH gets home and that would be great if she doesn't ... [snip!] ... idea. He's been texting me asking where I want to go. I want to run away, but I know that's also probably not a good idea."</blockquote>



Remember you only have to tell her what you want to trill her. Don't tell her who if you don't want to but legally it is against the law for her to yelp him.
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I have 2 kids & 2 angel babies & live in Houston, Texas
posted 1st Oct
Quoting BG Secrets:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Mel & a girl named Pey:</b>" <blockquote><b>Quoting ... [snip!] ... upset. I don't know if he would care so much about the cheating as he would knowing that it was with someone he knows so well."

The way I see it, X ruined his business the moment he decided to betray your husband. I'm glad you are going to tell him about your infidelity. Although by not telling him who X is is just going to make him look like a fool. Chit chatting it up with the man who boned his wife (and possibly finished his marriage), completely clueless. In this situation I think he deserves to know who X is. If it was a random one night stand stranger then it wouldn't matter. Just my opinion though.
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I have 2 kids & live in Toronto, Ontario
posted 1st Oct
<blockquote><b>Quoting GrumpsMama.:</b>" I'm not sure where this conversation has went. But, just remind yourself WHY you married your DH. and then decide if you guys should work on things or not."</blockquote>




I don't think at this point continuing the marriage is beneficial to any person involved. We got married mainly because I was pregnant and that's just what you are supposed to do around here, you know?
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I live in Arizona
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