My 1 year old seems like he has gone crazy...literally!

I have a 1 year old son....just turned 1 on the 9th of September. I feel like I am going to lose my mind and I do NOT know what to do. My son goes through non-stop temper tantrums where he hurts himself and me. He will throw things, scratch himself, throw himself on the floor, scream non-stop. He acts like he is being beaten. I have NO IDEA what to do or what could be going on. I'm starting to thing he has mental problems (no I am not being funny I am being serious). I hate to think of that because I want my son to be okay. I cannot deal with this anymore because it's an everyday thing and all day. This cannot be normal. It seems like I am the only mother out there dealing with this. It's also ruining my relationship with my fiance because he has no more patience left. I need HELP fast  

<blockquote><b>Quoting ashleynb1991:</b>" I have a 1 year old son....just turned 1 on the 9th of September. I feel like I am going to lose my mind ... [snip!] ... dealing with this. It's also ruining my relationship with my fiance because he has no more patience left. I need HELP fast  "</blockquote>




How do you react when he does this?

Quoting P Pickle Pants:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ashleynb1991:</b>" I have a 1 year old son....just turned 1 ... [snip!] ... my fiance because he has no more patience left. I need HELP fast  "</blockquote> How do you react when he does this?"

I try to comfort him and hold him but he just attacks my face and etc I have so many scratches and stuff from him. I also try to let him cry it out and be by himself and try to ignore it but he will hurt himself and do whatever he can to hurt himself I am so lost on what to do

Quoting P Pickle Pants:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ashleynb1991:</b>" I have a 1 year old son....just turned 1 ... [snip!] ... my fiance because he has no more patience left. I need HELP fast  "</blockquote> How do you react when he does this?"

and if I try to pick him up he pulls away even though he will follow me the whole time hes throwing a fit (which is never ending literally)

Watching. My son.just turned one on September 24 and when he throws fits he will bang his head against things. Wall,floor, the glass entertainment center. I try AMD hold him.to comfort him and he will arch back and struggle.to get out of my arms

Have you talked to his pedi yet. I'm thinking autism..... But I really don't know.

Quoting VaginaModel:" Watching. My son.just turned one on September 24 and when he throws fits he will bang his head against ... [snip!] ... the glass entertainment center. I try AMD hold him.to comfort him and he will arch back and struggle.to get out of my arms"

Is it all the time though? and is that all you do?

Quoting ashleynb1991:" I have a 1 year old son....just turned 1 on the 9th of September. I feel like I am going to lose my mind ... [snip!] ... dealing with this. It's also ruining my relationship with my fiance because he has no more patience left. I need HELP fast  "

When he starts to have them, redirect him. Sing a song really loud to him, whisper a story to him in his ear, start playing with his favorite toy, read a book. Make sure he doesnt have anything nearby that he can hurt himself with, or put him in his crib/play pen so he can have a "time out" to get the anger/frustration out and calm himself down. Also, look into baby sign language to help understand what he is wanting.

I have a one year old who has a temper as well. Usually he does it when he wants something he can not have. It is just frustrating for them because they are gaining their independence and can not say what they are feeling, thus taking it out on themselves.

IMO that's pretty normal. My 14 month old still has days where everything causes a tantrum. Right after she turned one I wanted to rip my hair out with the non stop tantrums. I've noticed that if I don't pay attention to the negative behavior (the tantrum) she usually stops quicker. When she's done throwing her fit I give her the attention that she wants. She cannot tell me "mama, I need _____" So acting out is how she seeks attention. So, when she's done throwing a fit I fix the problem. If she's hungry I give her a snack, if she's bored we go outside, if she wanted to play with something that is not allowed, I distract her with something else. If she throw a tantrum for longer than a minute, I start singing and dancing, and she forgets about what upset her and she usually laughs or dances with me.

It's hard. But it gets better.

Quoting BoogerBear's Momma:" When he starts to have them, redirect him. Sing a song really loud to him, whisper a story to him in ... [snip!] ... for them because they are gaining their independence and can not say what they are feeling, thus taking it out on themselves. "

   

<blockquote><b>Quoting ashleynb1991:</b>" Is it all the time though? and is that all you do?"</blockquote>




Pretty much always because it's when I tell him no and with his age and him being.mobile he's into everything. And I hold him and try AMD kiss him or tickle him and he wiggled out of my arms and just screams in the floor. It has gotten to the point where it really worries me


Sorry for the periods everywhere it's this stupid phone I hate it

<blockquote><b>Quoting ashleynb1991:</b>" and if I try to pick him up he pulls away even though he will follow me the whole time hes throwing a fit (which is never ending literally)"</blockquote>




By comforting him when he's throwing a for, you reinforce the behavior.

If my son is having a fit of evil and won't calm himself, I sit holding him on my lap facing out and cross his arms over his chest and bear hug him til he calms. Watch out for his head, he may be tall enough to clip you in the chin. Just dodge it.

Don't talk or reassure, just let him wear himself down in a way where he can't hurt himself.

My son has been this way since he was able to be. He's 22 months now and we've been able to teach him not to hit, kick, bite or scratch. I find that as long as I keep my voice calm and nice and leave out the word "no" (he really reacts to demanding or negative words), hit tantrums don't get too out of control. Distractions work pretty well if I can think of something quick enough. Like I'll say "Oooo, mommy loves this book!!!"And and he'll want to see what I'm talking about. Hugs if he's angry about not being able to do something he's been trying. If he's testing me, I just let him flail around in his room until he's worn out. I'm not going to try and stop him if he's just in a mood and needs to get his frustrations out. I've also found that if he doesn't get enough outdoor play, he's outta control. We go to the park at least once a day and I make him walk most of the way. Basically, lots and lots of patience, a place to safely let him blow off steam, a place where you can walk away for a minute, and trial and error. Just remember to stay calm and stay away from negative words or reactions. No one is perfect, I've broken down crying when nothing was working, but it seems like he's finally starting to understand that these fits won't get him his way.

Agree with the methods suggested to prevent the tantrums before they start or in the early stages.

Redirection, positive instructions ("do ____" instead of "don't do _____"), calm voice, and ignoring bad behavior!

<blockquote><b>Quoting P Pickle Pants:</b>" Agree with the methods suggested to prevent the tantrums before they start or in the early stages. Redirection, ... [snip!] ... stages. Redirection, positive instructions ("do ____" instead of "don't do _____"), calm voice, and ignoring bad behavior!"</blockquote>




It really makes a HUGE difference. Maybe not right away, but if you practice positive reinforcement, distraction, and being able to just back pff for a minute, you'll notice the changes in time. I had my son tested for autism because he is by far the angriest kid I've ever known, but they told me some kids are just like that. Give it time... and you're definitely not alone!