Forums > Debate & DiscussPage 1 <> 8by: Gir!

"Teen" mom vs "young" mom

Teen 13-19
 
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Teen 17-
 
23% (16 votes)

re: "Teen" mom vs "young" mom

posted 30th Sep
Quoting Gir!:" <blockquote><b>Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:</b>" Meeehhhhh. The American foster ... [snip!] ... off with their blood relatives; more likely to have a secure life no matter the mothers age, in comparison to smurf like that."


How would they be able to provide for them then? Like as far as their portion of utilities and such? And fun activities, clothes, trips, etc.? Everything that a family would normally do costs more when you have extra kids.
We're relative foster parents and without the per diem, we wouldn't be able to keep them. I'm VERY grateful for it b/c I don't want them going to a stranger.
quotesmurfs?
I'm TTC since January '13, have 5 kids & live in Indiana
posted 30th Sep
Quoting BoogerBear's Momma:" I agree. I do believe there should be wellness checks once in a while to make sure baby is getting everything ... [snip!] ... in my life because of a stupid law like that and having to live with a random family just because they are over the age of 18. "

They do check in with us once a month here. Plus, there's therapy once a week and every few weeks, a child advocate comes over.
I'm not sure they do that everywhere, but they should.
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I'm TTC since January '13, have 5 kids & live in Indiana
posted 30th Sep
<blockquote><b>Quoting ~Ice Princess~:</b>" How would they be able to provide for them then? Like as far as their portion of utilities and such? ... [snip!] ... without the per diem, we wouldn't be able to keep them. I'm VERY grateful for it b/c I don't want them going to a stranger. "</blockquote>




There are many many families that are fortunate enough to bare the burden of those extra babies and have the ability to do so. So what you are saying is that you'd support a movement to take away babies from those young parents who are either willing and perfectly able to support their babies OR whose families can support the child? There absolutely are many teenagers, and even full grown adults, who shouldn't have the chance to have children and their children MIGHT have been lucky enough to go to a GOOD foster home. However, it would be silly to rip away every baby born to a teen younger than 18 simply because of their age. It's better to do that case by case.

*i'm not trying to dog you btw. I'm just trying to get a better idea of what you are saying about this. There are horror stories like my oldest brothers' story. There are good ones, too. But there is no such thing as one size fits all. Society will never be able to fix it all with one solution
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I have 2 kids & live in Ohio
posted 30th Sep
<blockquote><b>Quoting Layla-and-Faith:</b>" What? lol.. you make it sound like being a "teen mom" is something to be proud of lol. I think anything ... [snip!] ... and that's all that's to it. I was 21 when my first was born, I feel it was a good age as I want to be "done" before 30  "</blockquote>




This is kind of a "society's idea of ..." Type question. It's come up a lot in discussion , basically referencing the shows "teen mom", "16&pregnant" and the new one. Most of the time I've heard people say they consider under 18 as more appropriately called "teen moms". Basically the question is asking when you hear somebody being called a teen mom is your first thought that they are younger than 18-19. I've referred to myself as one, its actually a little offensive depending on who's calling you that. My grandmother has said she thinks it mean the person is immature and really young, every time she hears it.
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I have 2 kids & live in Ohio
posted 30th Sep
I'm 19 years old...
I got married at 18,
Graduated at 17,
I'm a full time student and have a full time job,
And my husband is an astro-physics major and gets paid a great amount for research and working with radio frequencies and telescopes ....

I have a beautiful life and I was still called a statistic /:

I feel as though my life is great and I like to believe we are financially stable ,
But it still hurts when someone calls me a statistic..
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I'm due October 31st (a boy) & live in Brownsville, Texas
posted 30th Sep
Quoting Sarah Lee Murray:" I'm 19 years old... I got married at 18, Graduated at 17, I'm a full time student and have a full time ... [snip!] ... my life is great and I like to believe we are financially stable , But it still hurts when someone calls me a statistic.."

Are you going to be a full time student with a full time job once baby is here?

That would have to be difficult.

But, everyone fits in a statistic somewhere. I don't understand how someone can use it as an insult..
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I have 1 child & live in South Carolina
posted 30th Sep
Nope,

The plan is :

(if all goes well)

I will still be a full time student...
Like this semester I'm taking all online classes since the baby will be arriving some time this coming month, so far it's going well and I don't know why I haven't enrolled in more online classes !!

As for my job..

I had a series of long conversations with my manager,

I will be taking my maternity leave as soon as I possibly cannot stand going to work, or when the baby comes...

And after my 12 week maternity leave plus 3 weeks vacation + my 2 week sick leave...
(which is about 4 months added up)

I will return to work part time,
With manageable hours.

Hopefully all goes well.
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I'm due October 31st (a boy) & live in Brownsville, Texas
posted 30th Sep
<blockquote><b>Quoting BoogerBear's Momma:</b>" Are you going to be a full time student with a full time job once baby is here? That would have to ... [snip!] ... have to be difficult. But, everyone fits in a statistic somewhere. I don't understand how someone can use it as an insult.."</blockquote>



My mother and her boyfriend insulted me frequently. It's not unheard of. The statistic she's likely talking about is being a failure just because she had a baby young and got married young because of the baby.
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I have 2 kids & live in Ohio
posted 30th Sep
Quoting Gir!:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Back to Noob Status:</b>" Semantics, semantics. Really, you ... [snip!] ... now and comparing it to the meaning it was in 1600. Yes, There is a very fine line between semantics and personal opinions"

I understand that, but it is hard to argue against a term when it is right there in the definition. (i.e. NineTEEN). A woman under the age of twenty but is over twelve is a teenager and if she has a kid, she is therefore a teen mom. Can't argue with that fact.
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I live in Ohio
posted 30th Sep
<blockquote><b>Quoting Back to Noob Status:</b>" I understand that, but it is hard to argue against a term when it is right there in the definition. ... [snip!] ... age of twenty but is over twelve is a teenager and if she has a kid, she is therefore a teen mom. Can't argue with that fact."</blockquote>



I don't think you fully got what was being asked. It's not about solid facts (I.e. nineTEEN,eightTEEN, etc). I'm not disputing that. I had a good example and forgot before I got back on here. If I think of it again I will post it later.
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I have 2 kids & live in Ohio
posted 30th Sep
Quoting Gir!:" <blockquote><b>Quoting Back to Noob Status:</b>" I understand that, but it is hard ... [snip!] ... not disputing that. I had a good example and forgot before I got back on here. If I think of it again I will post it later."

From your OP:
"What age do you think the phrase "teen mom applies", and when just plain "young mom" is more appropriate?"


It applies to EVERY mom who falls in between the ages of thirteen and nineteen. A teen mom, by definition, is a young mom. In other words, all teen moms are young moms, but not all young moms are teens. Once the mother hits age twenty, she is no longer a "teen" and therefore cannot be labeled a teen mom, but rather a mother on the younger end.
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I live in Ohio
posted 30th Sep
At 18 I no longer considered myself a teen. I was an adult. I had a full time job, my own apartment, and had to pay my own bills. In the eyes of the law I was legally an adult.
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I have 1 child & live in Kentucky
posted 30th Sep
Quoting BMG:" At 18 I no longer considered myself a teen. I was an adult. I had a full time job, my own apartment, and had to pay my own bills. In the eyes of the law I was legally an adult."

EighTEEN.

You can be an adult AND still be a teenager. I don't understand why people don't understand this...
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I live in Ohio
posted 30th Sep
if someone is in their teens....they are a teen mom....just because they are a teen mom doesn't mean they are a bad mom but they are in fact a teen mom.

my mom had her first baby at 16 her second at 18. She still finished high school and got herself through college and was very successful.
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I have 1 child & live in Erie, Pennsylvania
posted 30th Sep
Quoting Back to Noob Status:" EighTEEN. You can be an adult AND still be a teenager. I don't understand why people don't understand this..."


 
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I have 2 kids & live in Quetzaltenango, Guatemala
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