And I bring this frustration upon myself. I hate when I have to do school work at night and my parents have to take care of DS. I try working when he's asleep but I feel as if he always wakes up right when I'm in the middle of writing a paper. DS is not their responsibility what so ever and I hate the fact that they must feel like that sometimes. I wish I was OK with putting him in daycare so I could get a job that pays more and I would be able to move out sooner. I love living with my parents (most of the time) but I know they probably hate living with me and the baby. They don't ever say anything but I know they're thinking that they should be empty nesters and now they have a baby in the house. Who wants that?
I feel so smurffy right now. I'm trying to be the best mom I can by going to school but it's so overwhelming. It's time like these when I wish BD would have stayed around just so he could help me when I have to do work. I'm just so irritated with myself. I don't know what to do.
I've felt exactly like you have before. I even have thought the same things, "if bd was here..." but i try and stop that thinking dead in it's tracks. If I'm really honest with myself I know bd probably would have just been added stress to me. Try not to get down on yourself because it sounds like you're doing a rad job! I too am currently living with my parents and they have been so awesome and understanding. This time in your life is only temporary. Your parents know that I'm sure. I know mine didn't picture things going this way but then again that's life and the unexpected happens!
Cal's mama ~ Just remember, it's not forever! I know it's hard right now, but please don't be so tough on yourself. You are doing your best for your son, and I'm sure your parents will come to see this time with their grandchild as a treasure and a blessing (if they haven't already!). Keep doing the best you can, and don't lose hope. It's a season of your life, and you will look back at it someday. Stay positive! ((Hugs))