PORNOGRAPHY!!!

First of all let me just say excuse the horrible spelling/Grammer I'm still getting used to my phone and the auto input thingy..that being said let me now say I have nothing against those who watch porn or are ok with their spouse doing so..however what gets me upset is when ppl say to those of us as couples who don't watch it that us women are just insecure, jealous, out feel threatened..it ticks me off..there are other reasons why couples choose to refrain from watching pornography that doesn't include any of the previously mentioned reasons...for example aa couple are morals, beliefs and standards are different in what we expect out of each other and our relationships..now just because our standards may be different I'm not implying that means were better just that we expect different things and want different things..I feel that if as a couple you agreed not to do something then you honor that commitment..and that if one person goes back on said promise that gives you every right to tell the person not in your home..in marriage you make covenants to each other that means you need to keep them..it also upsets me when especially women say..your husband will watch behind your back all men watch porn...how ignorant!! Men are very capable of not watching porn not all men want to watch porn or even desire to give them some credit girls that's like saying all military men will cheat because they have to have sex..men are not animals that can't control themselves..so basically what I'm saying is that porn is fine for those who are comfortable with it in their relationship...ppl need to so judging those who watch it and are fine with it...that being said same applies to those who don't watch it..stop judging those of us who don't condone it within our home..not all if us abstain from it because were jealous our insecure but because we think it can be harmful and want to avoid it...and not all men need to watch porn or do so...w need to stop putting men in this category of ask they want is sex sex sex

I'm far from insecure, or a prude. And neither my husband or I feel that pornography has a place in our marriage. I let what anyone else has to say roll off my shoulders.

That's why IDGAF what people think. I know my marriage, my husband and myself...that's all that matters.

I didn't read it all, because I don't have my glasses but I got the gist of it.

I understand what you mean, but if an adult wants to watch something shouldn't they be allowed to? If you had a discussion and he agreed to not watch porn then that is completely different, but if he had never made such an agreement and chose to watch it I think it is just one of those things that you either have to learn to accept and let it go, or move on if it hurts you that much.

Different strokes for different folks. Some people like porn, some don't. What you do in your house, is up to you. If you don't want to watch it, don't. You shouldn't care so much about what people think.

How can it be harmful? I do agree with you on the whole if you say you won't do something you need to honor it.

I agree that if its not something you talked about before marriage then it can become trickier on what should be done...however if you did talk about it and agreed not to then you need to honor that commitment...

<blockquote><b>Quoting ღ.ღ.ღ:</b>" How can it be harmful? I do agree with you on the whole if you say you won't do something you need to honor it."</blockquote>




If its something you agreed not to do but start to do it it van be harmful to your family because you broke trust within your marriage...and for some it can become an addiction which is harmful in many different ways.

Quoting ღ.ღ.ღ:" How can it be harmful? I do agree with you on the whole if you say you won't do something you need to honor it."

It can become an addiction, it can desensitize people, it can start replacing things in your marriage. Those are ways it can become harmful but if you keep communication open it might not become a problem.

I agree with you. DH and I both use to watch it, but we have both stopped as of January of this year. We had a rough year last year, and partly bc of porn. Together we made the decision to not watch it anymore, and we threw all of it away. I won't lie and say I'm not insecure, because I am and have been since I had DS.... But that had nothing to do with our decision. We just saw it as a problem in our marriage, and our thoughts on it changed. Out of our 5 years together, these last 9 months have been better than all of it. So, for us porn is not/will not be in our marriage...ever again. I think everyone has a right to their opinion, but people shouldn't automatically assume that every man watches porn behind their wife's back.

I love porn, SO knows that and doesn't ask me not to watch it. He doesn't like to watch it... oh well.

We aren't going to fight about it or leave each other because of it...



Do what you want in your house and I'll do what I want in mine, my only issue is when women (or men) demand that their spouse never watch it or look at other woman.... talking about it and demanding are two different things.

My husband and I dont watch porn. Porn has no place in a marriage....or mine anyway. My reasoning is purely religion. I am not a religious fanatic. I dont go to church. I believe in God and when I married my husband I made vows. The Bible says not to look at other men/women in lust or it becomes a sin. That is just *my* stance on it. Whatever others do in their marriage is solely their business and not mine.

Quoting **Blessed Insanity **:" I agree that if its not something you talked about before marriage then it can become trickier on what ... [snip!] ... trickier on what should be done...however if you did talk about it and agreed not to then you need to honor that commitment..."

I agree with this. It should be discussed prior to marriage, and then if the commitment is broken, that's a right to be upset.... But if it wasn't, I don't see it as a commitment being broken.

Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:" I love porn, SO knows that and doesn't ask me not to watch it. He doesn't like to watch it... oh well. ... [snip!] ... demand that their spouse never watch it or look at other woman.... talking about it and demanding are two different things. "

How would that work exactly? I mean you can see someone out in public and fantasize about them or someone on tv unless you put blinders on you will interact with the opposite sex.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Twin's Mommy:</b>" I agree with this. It should be discussed prior to marriage, and then if the commitment is broken, that's a right to be upset.... But if it wasn't, I don't see it as a commitment being broken."</blockquote>




Exactly..along with many other things that many couples these days really don't discuss before they get married.