Need advice :)

So, I am an expectant mommy, I am 25 weeks tomorrow, to a baby boy. The child's father and I are not together, he dumped me shortly after finding out we were pregnant, saying things with me "just weren't working out." He has been helping pay the medical cost of my deductible, we have been splitting it 50/50, says he wants to be a "hands-on dad," but he lives 5 hours away. I have asked him countless times to move somewhere closer, even an hour away, I could do, to be closer to his son, and he absolutely refuses. I do not care to be with him, there are no feelings there anymore, but I don't want to see my son hurt over something like this in the future. Does anyone have any advice/suggestions that would be helpful? Thanks, ladies.  

Your son won't be hurt as long as he has you there.

The most his "dad" will be is like an uncle to him...visiting once in a blue moon and such.

He probably won't even know that is not the norm until he is much older. By then, you will probably have a better male role model that hangs around for him.

Is there a reason he doesn't want to move closer?

Like a good paying job.. etc... ?

He currently works at a $10/hour job. His excuse is that if he moves, he won't be able to pay child support... which seems like a total crock of you-know-what to me, but I don't argue about it.

Quoting R Massey:" He currently works at a $10/hour job. His excuse is that if he moves, he won't be able to pay child support... which seems like a total crock of you-know-what to me, but I don't argue about it."

Even if it's a crock to you, it makes sense to him. The fact that he is willing to help you pay for things like your doctors appointments and he says he wants to be a hands on dad, I would count that as a blessing. Until he proves otherwise just go with the flow.

Well, that's what I AM doing... was just wondering if there was anything I could do to change his mind... didn't want to be shunned for posting a concern I had.  

Quoting R Massey:" Well, that's what I AM doing... was just wondering if there was anything I could do to change his mind... didn't want to be shunned for posting a concern I had.  "

Who is shunning you?  

If his mind is made up, then it is made up. His reasons for not leaving is his job. There is no guarantee if he moves he will be able to find a job that starts him at 10/hr.

I personally can't relate but have friends and family in your position. I would explain it and see if he could at least apply for new jobs. If he doesn't get any call backs, the situation is the same and if he does, then he doesn't have an excuse. Maybe ask him questions as it gets closer like how is he going to get the baby every other weekend or whatever custody yall decide on. You don't really know how involved he will be until the baby is born, everything does not set in for men until then.