What would you do

My boyfriend is so set on having 3 more kid and I'm not I want one more. And I want to start on having another one when my daughter is 2 or 3(want my kids and if I have more then 2 I want all my kids I want 2-3 years apart). My boyfriends has no objections because we can afford it, but he wants 3 more. I told him I'm not having 4 kid and the only way I'll try for a 3rd is if the 2nd is a girl and if the 3rd a girl to damn bad. But he still pushing me to it. I know we are going to have a boy next because everyone I know in my family has a girl 1st then a boy and same in his family. What would you do if your husband or boyfriend want more kids then you do. Don't you think it will put a strain on your relationship and possible cause it not to work out.

Quoting Lillie Montalvo:" My boyfriend is so set on having 3 more kid and I'm not I want one more. And I want to start on having ... [snip!] ... want more kids then you do. Don't you think it will put a strain on your relationship and possible cause it not to work out."

Probably should have talked about this before getting pregnant with number 1.

I personally would not be planning future children with just a boyfriend. I'd imagine it would put some sort of strain on the relationship if one person wanted a certain number of children and the other did not.

I don't want anymore kids, DH wants more kids. I'm willing to have one or two more but I wont have 5 or 6 kids. I think a compromise is good. You might change your mind so don't shut him down completely. Tell him you'll see how you feel after the next baby, who knows he might change his mind as well.


Do you guys plan on getting married? Or are you guys not into the entire marriage thing?

my SO does not want ANYMORE after this one... i want at least 2 more!! he is constantly say how he does not want ANYMORE at all! and i hate it cause the only reason is.... he doesn't want to spend his money on any one but himself! i want a girl so bad but if he really sticks to this no more i will never get her and it breaks my heart!! he just doesn't understand..

Well I would wait until you get married and are financially secure and then discuss it. It is very normal for one person to be ready for more kids than the other. You just have to make those decisions one kid at a time and see how you are doing financially and also how your schedules are at the time to decide if you want to try again. If you really love each other and want to be together you will find a compromise.

Stop telling her to wait till she is married.... jeeze I'll probably have all my kids before SO and I ever tie the knot. You don't have to be married to talk kids.

Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:" Stop telling her to wait till she is married.... jeeze I'll probably have all my kids before SO and I ever tie the knot. You don't have to be married to talk kids."

This. Plus some people never want to get married, nothing wrong with that.

Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:" Stop telling her to wait till she is married.... jeeze I'll probably have all my kids before SO and I ever tie the knot. You don't have to be married to talk kids."

Fair enough, some people prefer not to get married on paper and make a lifetime commitment to each other in some other way.
I guess I just mean wait until you are commited to each other for life and in an emotionally stable relationship. The financial stability part is also important. I believe in waiting until you are financially secure before having kids.

Quoting Lotusmama:" Fair enough, some people prefer not to get married on paper and make a lifetime commitment to each ... [snip!] ... The financial stability part is also important. I believe in waiting until you are financially secure before having kids."

That makes more sense!  

Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:" That makes more sense!   "

We getting married not this year coming up but next. And we can afford another kid right now but I want to wait till my daughter is 2 or 3. And he actually wants another baby(a boy) so at our wedding he wants our daughter and son to be the flower girl and ring bearer. I do not mind having another before marriage its the 4 kids part I worried about. I guess I will see how it is with 2 young children and go from there hopefully he changes his mind.

Quoting Lillie Montalvo:" We getting married not this year coming up but next. And we can afford another kid right now but I ... [snip!] ... kids part I worried about. I guess I will see how it is with 2 young children and go from there hopefully he changes his mind."

I would suggest not "leading him on" though. Tell him you are unsure about it, but you would consider it if he would be respectful to your opinions as well.

Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:" I would suggest not "leading him on" though. Tell him you are unsure about it, but you would consider it if he would be respectful to your opinions as well."

No he knows I said it a lot I do not want any more then 2 3 tops. But he is stuck on 4.

Quoting Lillie Montalvo:" No he knows I said it a lot I do not want any more then 2 3 tops. But he is stuck on 4."

Did you have a c-section? haha If you did you're in luck, many doctors (by that, I mean all doctors in Guatemala) will recommend no more than 3 sections are safe, and here they force you to tie your tubes.

I want four kids and am trying to find a way to get them! haha

Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:" Did you have a c-section? haha If you did you're in luck, many doctors (by that, I mean all doctors ... [snip!] ... sections are safe, and here they force you to tie your tubes. I want four kids and am trying to find a way to get them! haha"

Lol no I did not. My doctor said I was made to have babies I was like wtf. He said because I had a quick easy labor and delivery. And they cant make you get your tubs tide and stop you from having kids so I say just do it. Or move from there.