not "biological" father

is your SO the daddy to your child and the only daddy that he or shes knows, but he isnt really the childs biological father? If so, Are you ever going to tell the child the truth about this?

If so, at what age will you tell the child?

And in what way will you say it?


I just researched this online and a lot of mothers waited until the child was 13 and older and the teens were really saddened and hurt, in my opinion the earlier you tell the child the better. but how will you actually tell him or her.... Thats the hard part :-(

Are you in this situation, have you been, do you know anyone who has been, or did this actually happen with you and the guy that you thought was your biological dad? id like to hear stories, thanks ladies in advance.

Novali knows that SO isn't her bio dad..... she remembers when she met him, even tells people how she met her daddy...

He is wanting to adopt her.

If she forgets that he isn't related to her biologically, I don't think I'll ever remind her. What's the point??

My husband and I have been together since my 16 year old was a baby and we always let him know he had another "father" not that he ever was much of one but last year he got in touch and wanted to see my son so I was so thankful we had been honest from the beginning. It was confusing and emotional enough for a teenager without adding on that his dad wasn't his real dad and we didn't lose any trust which I think we would have lost had my son not already known the truth. Him knowing there was someone else out there never affected the relationship he has with my husband and I know he will always be the number 1 man in my sons life, he calls his biological dad Andy!!

I'm a product of this scenario. My Dad is not my biological father.But he married my mom when she was 3 months pregnant. They actually had planned to either NOT tell me at all or wait until I was a teen to tell me. I actually figured it out by myself at 7 and it absolutely killed the relationship between me and my Dad, he felt betrayed thinking my Mom told me without him and I felt betrayed that I was lied too. In my personal experience I WISH they had told me when I was little so I wasn't ever denied the truth, and maybe things would've been easier. Im now 31 and do not know my bio dad, and never will, and I have strained relationship with the man that gave me his last name.

My oldest sister is not my dads biological daughter. She was 3-4 when my mom met my dad. I'm not sure if she remembers, if/how or when she was told, but when I reached 9 or 10 I asked my mom why she didn't have our last name. By this time my sister was 13-14, they simply said she had a different "dad" but he wasn't around and my dad was her dad, and she was my sister end of story. It was never a big deal, never really came up.

When she was about 16 he tried to come back in her life, my mom would always ask if she wanted to talk to him and she always refused. My mom never kept her from having a relationship with him. She always kept his address & phone number in her dresser. My sister is 28 now, has never tried to reach out to him but that's her choice. Last year on Christmas one of her cousins wrote her a letter. It stayed in the living room for about 3 months before she opened it with us. We looked through the girls Facebook, but she never reached out. To this day, she was raised as my dads, in fact she's in his will and in charge of most things when he passe
When we read the letter we asked why she didn't want to respond, she simply stated that we were het family. I respect her decision and will ack

<blockquote><b>Quoting .:Mary:.:</b>" My oldest sister is not my dads biological daughter. She was 3-4 when my mom met my dad. I'm not sure ... [snip!] ... letter we asked why she didn't want to respond, she simply stated that we were het family. I respect her decision and will ack"</blockquote>


Sorry, on my phone and it won't let me fix the last part.

I respect her decision and will support her if she decides to pursue a relationship with them at any point.

Quoting .:Mary:.:" My oldest sister is not my dads biological daughter. She was 3-4 when my mom met my dad. I'm not sure ... [snip!] ... letter we asked why she didn't want to respond, she simply stated that we were het family. I respect her decision and will ack"

My sisters were both older when my parents got together (they have a different bio-dad than I do). My dad adopted them and they have his last name. I didn't know that were "half sisters" with me until I was a teenager...


It affected one, she is now in touch with her "dad's" family, but wanted nothing to do with him (he died recently). My other sister doesn't care.

Novali's father was extremely abusive and tried to kidnap her... she has nightmares still sometimes of him trying to kill me and take her away. She will never have that option of seeing him or knowing him. I feel sad that it has to be that way.

I thought my "father" was my bio father til I was around eleven. Then my mother told me the truth. Then I had the pick of two asscrickets to be my dad.

Safe to say I chose neither. I wish my mum told me but only because of what I went through

<blockquote><b>Quoting Rumpelstiltskin:</b>" My sisters were both older when my parents got together (they have a different bio-dad than I do). ... [snip!] ... me and take her away. She will never have that option of seeing him or knowing him. I feel sad that it has to be that way. "</blockquote>




That is sad, I can't imagine how I'd deal with that.


Also I can't say my sister wasn't affected, I'm sure she was she just doesn't like bringing it up. He gave her his last name but decided to change his mind afterwards. My mom couldn't support both of them so moved back to mexico for a while. My sister actually kept her bio dads last name even now that she's married, who knows why.

I'm in this situation now.

I have a 4 year old, and my ex (met when i was 6 months pregnant) has always been the only dad he has ever known. He goes to see his real dads family, but his real dad wants nothing to do with him, and will not be around if my son is there..

My ex and i said if my 4 year olds dad ever wants to come around, we won't deny him that but we where never sure if or how we would tell him. I guess we've decided to just play it day-by-day and if he asks, we will sit down and be honest with him, i'm guessing he's going to start asking questions in the next 2-3 years though..