Quoting Mama*AtoZ:" He said he was specifically trying to get me pregnant. It's put me off sex and having children again, ... [snip!] ... aborting a child, when you're already raising their sibling? This is mindsmurfing stuff and i'm not sure how to deal with it."
It is a difficult situation to be in and I'm sorry that he of all people were the one to do this to you. But like you said. Having this baby (if you are pregnant) would be to hard on you mentally and physically.
I personally have never been through an abortion. But I think that if I were in your situation that I would be doing the same thing. And I think that I would be thinking the same things too. Even about your son.
The only thing that I can try to suggest as an outsider is that you have to remember that you son is also a part of you. And because you have raised him and because he is so close to you he is almost more a part of you than he is that ass hole. I'm sure if your son was old enough to understand what happened or if he knew (not saying tell him) that he would be disgusted that his father did that to you.
I know things are hard right now and you have EVERY right to think and feel the way you do. I wish I could just go right through the computer and give you a hug. But things will get better.
Try and find somewhere that will take in women and children so you don't have to spend your money on a hotel, and so that you can have protection.
And when you are up to it. Try and have some one on one time with your LO.
I saw on your profile that you baby wear and that you BF'd up to at least 2.
You have a close bond with him. He loves you and would never hurt you the way his father did. I'm sorry. I hope some of this helped mamma.