.....

I've been wondering where you've been

Are you ok? Is the bastard in jail?

You need to go have a full exam as soon as you possibly can

I don't have any good pointers but I'm sure there are lots of women on here that will be able to help.
I just wanted to say I'm so sorry that this happened to you. And that I hope everything works out for you.
If you do want to talk I would love to try and help as I am a rape victim. Good luck hun.

When it happened to me I went to the hospital to get examined
Im free to talk whenever you want.

I was raped and aborted.

No matter what happens, it is difficult. Good luck.

Quoting Mama*AtoZ:" No, it took them over a week to get him and he was in jail for one night. So i'm hiding in another city ... [snip!] ... I was super tired when i was pregnant with him, so again it's worrying me. i just wish this whole thing wasn't happening. "

I'm so sorry hun. *hugs*

Just get the tests done and over with so you know for sure. You can't move forward until you get it all taken care of.

Quoting Mama*AtoZ:

How long ago did it happen?
I hope for your sake that you aren't pregnant. Hopefully alot of this is just nerves from being so upset about what happened.
But I really think that you should go get checked out. Maybe they can help you to get to talk to someone that can help you cope mentally with what happened and to get you somewhere to stay until he is sent back to jail.

Quoting Mama*AtoZ:"

I'm so sorry hun. I completely understand why you don't want to deal with it.
But hiding will make it to where in a way he still has power over you. Do you have any friends or family in the area that can watch LO for a few hours while you go get things taken care of? You don't have to tell anyone what happened just tell them you have some job interviews or something that you wouldn't be able to take him with you for.

I am so very sorry to hear what you are going through. I am here if you need someone to talk to, I was raped and I know the feeling of being scared to go get checked out. The guy who raped me did ejaculate in me and I was scared I was pregnant as well. Luckily, I did not get pregnant. The guy who raped me was never found and I thought it was my fault and I felt so disgusted and ashamed, that I did not get checked out right away. I did go home and shower because I felt so disgusted with what had happened.

Quoting Mama*AtoZ:" He said he was specifically trying to get me pregnant. It's put me off sex and having children again, ... [snip!] ... aborting a child, when you're already raising their sibling? This is mindsmurfing stuff and i'm not sure how to deal with it."

It is a difficult situation to be in and I'm sorry that he of all people were the one to do this to you. But like you said. Having this baby (if you are pregnant) would be to hard on you mentally and physically.
I personally have never been through an abortion. But I think that if I were in your situation that I would be doing the same thing. And I think that I would be thinking the same things too. Even about your son.
The only thing that I can try to suggest as an outsider is that you have to remember that you son is also a part of you. And because you have raised him and because he is so close to you he is almost more a part of you than he is that ass hole. I'm sure if your son was old enough to understand what happened or if he knew (not saying tell him) that he would be disgusted that his father did that to you.
I know things are hard right now and you have EVERY right to think and feel the way you do. I wish I could just go right through the computer and give you a hug. But things will get better.
Try and find somewhere that will take in women and children so you don't have to spend your money on a hotel, and so that you can have protection.
And when you are up to it. Try and have some one on one time with your LO.

I saw on your profile that you baby wear and that you BF'd up to at least 2.
You have a close bond with him. He loves you and would never hurt you the way his father did. I'm sorry. I hope some of this helped mamma.

Quoting Mama*AtoZ:" Thanks so much for not judging me. I've not talked to anyone about it and i just feel so horrible and awful. "

Of course. Don't feel bad HE did this to you. HE made you feel like this.
This is all his fault.
And like I said if you EVER want to talk. Even if it's just to blow some steam feel free. You can PM me anytime. <3