Forums > Single Parentingby: Chip Skylark

Only child.

posted 28th Aug
I had my son when I was 17 and in a few months I will be 23 and my son will be 6.

His father ,Sam, and I separated when my son, Isaiah, was only 4 months old and he hasn't been in the picture since then. Which that means that my son has no idea that he even has a father and also that he has another brother. Half brother that is. Sam has another son ,Markus, besides the son we have together, but his son was taken away by the government. That is a long story in itself but the point is my son doesn't have any brothers or sisters that he is aware of and he spends most of his time alone.

When I had my son, I was very young and another child soon after was out of the question. Now that I'm older, I've been focusing on my education too much to even think of the possibility of raising another child,but I feel guilty at times because he is so lonely. Sure he goes to school and I take him to the park to socialize with other kids but at the end of the day, he is alone.

I try to have conversations with him often and play with him but I'm sure that because there age difference it's not the same. I'd like to take him to meet his.

I have one sister who is a senior in high school and I won't be done with school for another 5 years. By the time I have my school done and my career going or the possibility that my younger sister have a child, my son will be in his teens.

Sure life can be a surprise but if everything goes according to plan he won't really have the joy of a sibling or a cousin for a good while.

Are you an only child and if so how did you cope with it as a child? or if you're a mom with a only one child how do you cope with you're child feeling lonely at times?
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I have 1 child & live in Florida
posted 28th Aug
I personally felt bad for my child.not having anyone to play with at home. That's why my SO and I chose to have #2.
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I have 2 kids & live in Las Vegas, Nevada
posted 28th Aug
I was an only child until I was almost 13 and my younger siblings are still some of my best friends. It was just my mom and I until I was 9 and I'm sure I was lonely sometimes as a kid, but I'm not scarred by it or anything. We always did a lot together.
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I have 3 kids & live in Edmonton, Alberta
posted 28th Aug
Quoting Cheke08&Bella12: Mamii:" I personally felt bad for my child.not having anyone to play with at home. That's why my SO and I chose to have #2."

I know that feeling too well, but I'd really like to reach my goal and that is my career. Hopefully my son makes friends at school that can come over and play with him. Btw I love your Chavo del ocho y la chilindrina picture  
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I have 1 child & live in Florida
posted 28th Aug
Im an only child, I was severely spoiled but depressed most of my life because I was alone. I grew up to fast because all I had was adults around me. It was miserable lonely years. Its affected me as an adult now to, I hate being alone and feel alone all the time but I almost prefer it that way. Im socially awkward and have horrible anxiety. My mom was working and in school most of my younger years. Had I had a sibling or anyone close in my age aIm sure I would of been happy. But meh to late now.
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I have 2 kids & 1 angel baby & live in Connecticut
posted 28th Aug
Quoting Gheordynn [CNL]:" I was an only child until I was almost 13 and my younger siblings are still some of my best friends. ... [snip!] ... I was 9 and I'm sure I was lonely sometimes as a kid, but I'm not scarred by it or anything. We always did a lot together."


That's great to know! I hope my son Isaiah will view it this way instead of having some anger towards me for it.
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I have 1 child & live in Florida
posted 28th Aug
I'm still an only child, and I find that even though it could be lonely, I was never alone. =) My parents got me involved in a lot of things around the community to get me used to other kids and to give me something to do. I was in art classes, self defense classes, Sea World Camp, you name it! Being an only child for me wasn't so bad because I didn't have to do things that other kids had to do like watch their younger siblings, so I had more time to spend with friends or on art projects and homework. No shame in it just being him and Mom. =) Just make sure he has an interest in the world around him, and he'll not be so alone!
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I live in Japan
posted 28th Aug
<blockquote><b>Quoting Leeandra Mottern:</b>" I'm still an only child, and I find that even though it could be lonely, I was never alone. =) My parents ... [snip!] ... No shame in it just being him and Mom. =) Just make sure he has an interest in the world around him, and he'll not be so alone!"</blockquote>




Exactly!!
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I have 3 kids & live in Edmonton, Alberta
posted 28th Aug
Quoting Leeandra Mottern:" I'm still an only child, and I find that even though it could be lonely, I was never alone. =) My parents ... [snip!] ... No shame in it just being him and Mom. =) Just make sure he has an interest in the world around him, and he'll not be so alone!"


Thank you so much. Great advice
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I have 1 child & live in Florida
posted 28th Aug
Our daughter will be an only child herself until she is at the very least your son's age, but we intend to really get her involved in as many things as she wants to get her little paws on. lol Her daddy is a Science major and I myself am big into arts and culinary studies, so we hope that if we can just keep her interested in different things, she'll be a well rounded person. Her dad and I are best friends before we are lovers, but she comes first. If we can swing it right, she'll learn to lean on the people that care about her first before she worries about those that don't out of loneliness, and that's what we aim for. I know you said his dad isn't in the picture, but you are and that's what matters. =)
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I live in Japan
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