Forums > Abortion SurvivorsPage 1 2by: teenmomof3tobe

why mine?

posted 22nd Aug

It seems emotionally I can't handle 3 kids under 2 by the time I'm due. But it's like I hate having to pick this one. Like that this child is unwanted it's saddening I don't want any of my own children to be unwanted and that's what it is. Also its not easy to make a decision in this season when political beliefs are just so publicized. And I'm not even prochoice. I dont know how I can look at myself and admit I don't want my own child. I feel broken. I should love him despite his dad being an smurf. i can't help but not see this child any differently than the last pregnancies. I feel bad for that.I feel like a bad mom. I dont get how does one accept they're a good person and a good mom and still are ok and accept that they didn't want their own child. It's true I do feel that I wish I didn't and I feel like I shouldn't I just wish I didn't have to accept that and don't know how to peacefully tbh... advice?

quote smurfs?

I'm due April 14th, have 2 kids & live in Henderson, Nevada

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Lil Dude's Mamma

1599 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

I didn't want my child for a long time, even after he was born I struggled. It was a long, hard road but I made it through. You're NOT a bad mom for feeling like this. Therapy helped me tremendously.

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I have 1 child & live in Argentina

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K ♥ EC&baby ♥

3014 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

I felt the same way with this pregnancy being that my BD is a douch bag...and I hated him for leaving us again, and for me being pregnant when he did it again...And I didn't want this baby...I've since tho come to terms after I had an ultrasound done. I was alright

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I have 3 kids & live in Ontario

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Rette Mich

27307 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

I felt that a lot when I was pregnant. Hell sometimes I still feel that way and hes 4!! Being a Mama is such a hard road but we almost always see the right way after a while. I really wish you well with whatever comes your way! God bless!

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I have 1 child & live in Texas

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Rachyl + Jordan

213 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

I didn't want my son while I was pregnant for a long time probably until I was 7 month and I still had my doubt a couple of days before I was to have him.

Its okay, I think a lot of people go through it.

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I have 1 child & live in Michigan

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teenmomof3tobe48 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

it's just hard to accept and to tnot think why this child? Why is he unlucky it makes me feel like life is just so unfair.

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I'm due April 14th, have 2 kids & live in Henderson, Nevada

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Melissa Molina

49 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

I had a lot of doubts when i found out I was preg with number 4. I cried a LOT and tossed things back and forth for a couple months. I take care of the three almost by myself since the DH works so much and I couldn't see adding another one on top of all of it. Then I had the same reaction, how could I choose one of my children over another? I felt bad, sick, mad, hurt, every preg emotion and then some. There are some days I still question myself with all of this, i am now 29 wks, but I found talking to a couple good friends when I am breaking down, going on the forums here, and calling my grandma often has helped me. Things are not easy either way you choose for your family, I knew in my heart that i couldn't live with myself afterwards mentally so I pushed forward and look for support where i can find it. I wish you all the luck with your choice and only you know what you and your family can handle. GL.

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I have 4 kids & live in Aurora, Illinois

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Yurvette [♥]

32057 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

Honey, I know that feeling but would you want your kids NOW to suffer? The kids that you already have?

You can always do therapy. Therapy is a lifeline to help out.

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I live in Fiorina, San Marino

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teenmomof3tobe48 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

is it a sign? I think that it's so hardto do an abortion at this point in nv. Because I asked they said no clinics do general anesthesia which I was depending on. I don't want that memory to haunt me. So to top it off I feel pretty much I'm bound to have regret. No I don't know what good I'll be if this takes too much of a toll on me and leads me to a role of life I left. For a good reason. I don't think I'll be good to them then either. Ehh the situation is a rock and a hard place. I think I'm just too damn maternal for my own good

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I'm due April 14th, have 2 kids & live in Henderson, Nevada

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Yurvette [♥]

32057 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

Quoting teenmomof3tobe:" is it a sign? I think that it's so hardto do an abortion at this point in nv. Because I asked they said ... [snip!] ... be good to them then either. Ehh the situation is a rock and a hard place. I think I'm just too damn maternal for my own good"

If you were early enough, you can do the medical one. It is not a sign. Who are you really benefiting if you go through with this pregnancy? Dont say the baby. You have to think about your sanity and your alive kids. You can do this. You are not in the place that you can have a great life with 3 kids under 2. Yes, it does happen but he wont leave his wife, whatever you says that he says hes lying. He will never leave her. And you can bet your boots that he wont pay CS.

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I live in Fiorina, San Marino

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teenmomof3tobe48 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

I believe I am early enough. I don't really think it does him any good to be born and for me to keep him... I think adoption is what he deserves. But I know I can't give that to him. And I'm not in a place to have3 kids and am better off with an abortion. just doing it is another thing completely it seems. also i actually am not living with him our relationship is clearly unstable. idk. thats a separate subject. he will have to pay but its not enoug emotionally i know without anyone im stretched to the limit already... thats why i liked him around partially.

quote

I'm due April 14th, have 2 kids & live in Henderson, Nevada

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Yurvette [♥]

32057 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

Quoting teenmomof3tobe:" I believe I am early enough. I don't really think it does him any good to be born and for me to keep ... [snip!] ... its not enoug emotionally i know without anyone im stretched to the limit already... thats why i liked him around partially."

You dont need to be with anyone to be good. You can make it with 2 on your own. I know its another thing emotionally.

If you need funding... Nevada
Justice Fund
775-688-5560 http://www.plannedparenthood.org/mar-monte/
The Justice Fund helps pay for abortions for residents of Northern Nevada and North Lake Tahoe who are patients of Planned Parenthood. This Planned Parenthood doesn't provide abortions, but if you have gone there for a pregnancy test or other service, you can call the Fund and ask if you are eligible for assistance.

If you need ANY OTHER HELP.. I as I am sure all of the other girls are willing to help you out by talking and helping you go through this. <3

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I live in Fiorina, San Marino

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JanieNixon

137 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

Quoting Yurvon [♥]:" If you were early enough, you can do the medical one. It is not a sign. Who are you really benefiting ... [snip!] ... his wife, whatever you says that he says hes lying. He will never leave her. And you can bet your boots that he wont pay CS. "

to me it seems like you are trying to make her decision for her. don't get me wrong i am pro choice but i believe that it is completely their choice. I know that you are just trying to give her advice but to me it sounds like you are forcing an abortion on her.

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I have 2 kids & live in Fresno, California

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JanieNixon

137 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

Quoting Yurvon [♥]:" If you were early enough, you can do the medical one. It is not a sign. Who are you really benefiting ... [snip!] ... his wife, whatever you says that he says hes lying. He will never leave her. And you can bet your boots that he wont pay CS. "

to me it seems like you are trying to make her decision for her. don't get me wrong i am pro choice but i believe that it is completely their choice. I know that you are just trying to give her advice but to me it sounds like you are forcing an abortion on her.

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I have 2 kids & live in Fresno, California

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Yurvette [♥]

32057 posts

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posted 22nd Aug

Quoting JanieNixon:" "

No I am not... Im trying to help her. I am not forcing anything on her. Why would I do that? Either thing is going to mess her up and cause her pain. I would never WISH that on anyone, not even on my worse enemy.

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