re: so my bf is a liar. Now what? Advice?

Quoting teenmomof3tobe:" I actually used bc with this one it failed me. My first I was raped. My second son is my biggest mistake. ... [snip!] ... aat all better than this. I have more money this time around. I am a lot more healed from the whole childhood mess.so yea...."

having more money this time is nice, but it isn't everything. There is the emotional toll of having 3 kids while you are still a teen. It's not a good situation for anyone, your children included

And this guy isn't going to leave his wife and kids for you. He would have done so already

Quoting Erika Rylands:" ."

This is a protected forum. Dont bring up adoption.

I really think if you're not posting to support the op...then you should just stop. Let the ones who need to be modded, be modded and ignore them. Responding to them just causes it to drag on longer.

Op, you have to do what feels best for you. Sometimes it helps to make a pros and cons list. GL in your decision making.

Quoting Kelly&Coralie:" having more money this time is nice, but it isn't everything. There is the emotional toll of having ... [snip!] ... anyone, your children included And this guy isn't going to leave his wife and kids for you. He would have done so already"

I agree with kelly , op/

OP I have been through a lot, and If you need someone to talk to you can PM me. I would abort in your situation. In my situation, I wished I had aborted, but no I did the worst thing that a mother has to go through.

Quoting Yurvon [♥]:" This is a protected forum. Dont bring up adoption. "

Sorry!

But my main point still stands. Leave the married dude and do what you feel is best FOR YOU.

<blockquote><b>Quoting Yurvon [♥]:</b>" Do you know how your reply sounds to someone that is going through somthing like this. This is a protected forum. "</blockquote>
No different than the person above my comment or below my comment. Telling her to have children when she's more stable isn't any different than telling someone to consider adoption or abortion. It really isn't. I'm not in any way being mean to her and I wish her the best.

Quoting Yurvon [♥]:" I agree with kelly , op/ OP I have been through a lot, and If you need someone to talk to you can ... [snip!] ... in your situation. In my situation, I wished I had aborted, but no I did the worst thing that a mother has to go through. "

 

Quoting Kelly&Coralie:" having more money this time is nice, but it isn't everything. There is the emotional toll of having ... [snip!] ... anyone, your children included And this guy isn't going to leave his wife and kids for you. He would have done so already"

I agree with this reasoning. I had my son at 21, with a DEADBEAT dad. It's been a rough road. Although I am sure you are well aware OP since you have two LO's already! You definitely have a lot to consider here, my only piece of advice would be that when you are making your decision consider yourself a single mother of 3 with no child support. Make your decision based on that lifestyle. If you choose to proceed with your pregnancy and he turns out to be Mr. Wonderful then that is added benefit, but I would not count on it!
Good luck!

Quoting Shootin' Rainbows:"  "

no sad faces. Its learning experiences. and advice I can tell others that are thinking about adoption, abortion and possibly keeping it. lol. I have done all 3.

Wow! That's a whole sticky situation you're in right there! Now, as for the bf- leave him! You already know what type of father and spouse he is... And, so far as having more money this time, well... That's great but you'll have 3 in diapers and that is very expensive. Now, my personal beliefs on abortion aside, if you feel it's to much to deal with than go through with it, if not give the baby up for adoption, and if you can't do either of those then keep and love him or her. But consider ALL options, life is life, and life is precious, but like you said you have to be fair to all of your kids AND yourself. You say you were using but stopped, congrats on that, but stress can easily push you back down and that's the very last thing you need in your life!! I hope all turns out well for you and your babies and I hope you do whatever feels right to you. Remember, it's your body, your children and your sanity. That's a lot to keep in balance and perspective and I wish you the best.

Quoting Yurvon [♥]:" no sad faces. Its learning experiences. and advice I can tell others that are thinking about adoption, abortion and possibly keeping it. lol. I have done all 3. "

I'm glad you can look at it that way.
I cannot imagine making that decision. My mom gave a child up for adoption when she was 15, and she still has issues with it 35 years later.

Quoting Shootin' Rainbows:" I'm glad you can look at it that way. I cannot imagine making that decision. My mom gave a child up for adoption when she was 15, and she still has issues with it 35 years later."

I mean I have problems with it. Smurf Im 25 and he is 9 months old. But everything I went through last year was hard on myself and my oldest. I try to look at it in a positive way since its already done with. I can understand what your mom feels like.

Quoting Yurvon [♥]:" I mean I have problems with it. Smurf Im 25 and he is 9 months old. But everything I went through last ... [snip!] ... and my oldest. I try to look at it in a positive way since its already done with. I can understand what your mom feels like. "

*hugs*

Quoting Heather Jacques:" Wow! That's a whole sticky situation you're in right there! Now, as for the bf- leave him! You already ... [snip!] ... it's your body, your children and your sanity. That's a lot to keep in balance and perspective and I wish you the best."

I do feel it is so much. Financially I keep thinking though like he does have money that even if he's absent cs could help out. It's more emotionally I don't think I can handle it alone and that's what I am basically alone. It seems too overwhelming my bf won't agree to an adoption... I rely on him also I don't want to bring tension between us for this. He definantly wants to get an abortion. He has shown he isn't made for being a father I guess it's his child too. Maybe it's best for everyone to just terminate. I just feel guilty knowing all I went through for my sons that I'm not willing to go through for this one. Also I know I started using heavily after I got raped because of exactly that stress and under pressure. I've managed though as long as I improve I'm motivated not to use.

Quoting teenmomof3tobe:" I do feel it is so much. Financially I keep thinking though like he does have money that even if ... [snip!] ... got raped because of exactly that stress and under pressure. I've managed though as long as I improve I'm motivated not to use."

Do not count on child support. If he has 2 other kids, they were born first and therefore will get the majority of child support money. My guess is that he hasn't been keeping up on that. You will be lucky to get any financial support from CS.