I really don't know what to do at this point!

I am loosing it, I really seriously am.
My son is almost 16 moths old, I really don't know what to do with him.
I wish I had like a 3rd smurfing voice in helping me care for him. My SO knows just as much as I do..and works 50 some hours a week. So it's just me, and Isaac.
I wish I had someone here to say "Yes Sam, MAKE him cry it out" ..blah blah blah.
Seriously, I can't do cry it out because
1. I am afraid DHS will be called. I just have that smurfing fear. Not like there's any reason to fear..it's just hard to explain.
2. I really honestly believe my son will cry himself to death. Anytime I am not in the room with him..he BUGGGS out.
3. He wont sleep in his bed. -_-..just WILL not go near it.


Okay, I think all my frustration is coming out because of my SO...smurfing HELP me take care of OUR SON every now and again.

Why is this so hard?
I get so frustrated, so easily now days!

The best thing you can do is just try. If that is what you want to do then start off with a minute, check and comfort, then do 2, then 3 and etc. You could try sleeping in/next to his bed with him to see if that helps at all. Read or play music whatever that could be a comfort to him so he doesn't freak out with it. And I won't even get started on the SO thing. If you figure something out then let me know

Paige was the same way.. I didn't want to CIO. But at 9 months, she would stay up until 7am back to back night after night. No amount of coddling, cooing, rocking, soothing, playing or ANYTHING would help. (We also lived in an apartment complex) I put her in her crib but as long as she could see me, she freaked out for hours and hours.

So one night I just couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't stay awake myself any longer. I put her in bed with her toys and left the room. She cried for 3- mins maybe 45.. but then started playing with her toys and eventually went to sleep. Before this point, she co-slept with me every night and she'd keep us up all night and want to play. Now she sleeps in her own room all night.

Does he have a comfort object? Have something he'll ONLY get when he goes to his bed. Like if he likes reading books, or a particular toy or watching a show, let him do it only before he goes to bed so he gets excited about going to bed. (DD's comfort object is her bottle so she gets a sippy cup all day and a bottle at bed. She gets all excited and starts giggling when she's in bed now because she expects the bottle and a bedtime story) Try going slowly.. start the routine at nap time and gradually move it to bed time.

Your options are to either ease him into it, try CIO or get your SO to help out.

I know it's hard doing it alone, I will never say this on FB but Jason really SUCKS at helping with Rory... And if he cries, I get him handed right back. He'll play with him until he pisses him off and he's screaming then hands him to me -.-

All I can really say is just breathe. It's stressful, but I promise, unless he has a habit of choking he won't cry himself to death. And no I'm not saying I have Rawr CIO yet. Hopefully he'll just cry himself to sleep eventually. It'll eventually work one way or another.

Maybe it's because we were very attached until she was 3...but why why cio if it upsets both of you so much? Doesn't make sense to me.

Quoting Máthair Gruaig Gorm:" Maybe it's because we were very attached until she was 3...but why why cio if it upsets both of you so much? Doesn't make sense to me."

Because sometimes there's just nothing you can do from my experience. Even now the last few days Rory just screams bloody murder nonstop no matter what I do. I am constantly rocking, swaying, walking back and forth over and over up and down, in front of the fan, up and down the hall. If he was old enough I'd just let him cry until he was finished because if nothing I'm going to do is going to help, what else am I supposed to do, ya know?

<blockquote><b>Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:</b>" Because sometimes there's just nothing you can do from my experience. Even now the last few days Rory ... [snip!] ... let him cry until he was finished because if nothing I'm going to do is going to help, what else am I supposed to do, ya know?"</blockquote>


I guess, but it didn't sound like that in the OP. And I just held her through it. She had stomach problems for a long time.

Quoting Squid Kid:" Paige was the same way.. I didn't want to CIO. But at 9 months, she would stay up until 7am back to back ... [snip!] ... nap time and gradually move it to bed time. Your options are to either ease him into it, try CIO or get your SO to help out. "

I have tried the toy thing. The reason why he is acting all crazy lately is because I just took the bottle away. He LOVED his bottle. & he refuses sippy cups..so I have to help him drink all day long. I have tried CIO many, many times. I just want to give up. I seriously want my mom to take him for a week. I'm a horible person...I've never really needed help until now

Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:" I know it's hard doing it alone, I will never say this on FB but Jason really SUCKS at helping with Rory... ... [snip!] ... saying I have Rawr CIO yet. Hopefully he'll just cry himself to sleep eventually. It'll eventually work one way or another. "

Yeah, my face book is all rainbows & butterflies.
Sean seriously is good for handing Isaac the xbox controller to play games with him. He sleeps in a different room for crying out loud..but don't get me started on that. Maybe another time.

Quoting Máthair Gruaig Gorm:" Maybe it's because we were very attached until she was 3...but why why cio if it upsets both of you so much? Doesn't make sense to me."

It's getting to the point where he sleeps on & around my neck.
I cannot stand to hear him cry. Seriously, I cannot do it. It's a loose loose situation for me

<blockquote><b>Quoting GrumpsMama.:</b>" It's getting to the point where he sleeps on & around my neck. I cannot stand to hear him cry. Seriously, I cannot do it. It's a loose loose situation for me"</blockquote>



I slept holding my daughter until she was 3, and when she was ready she went into her own bed. It was a seamless transition because she felt secure and she got to choose to do it. have you considered laying down with him and getting up when he's asleep?

Quoting Máthair Gruaig Gorm:" <blockquote><b>Quoting GrumpsMama.:</b>" It's getting to the point where he sleeps ... [snip!] ... she felt secure and she got to choose to do it. have you considered laying down with him and getting up when he's asleep?"

Yeah, that's exactly what I do. I guess it makes more sense in what you just said. Idk, I don't want him in my bed forever

Quoting GrumpsMama.:" Yeah, my face book is all rainbows & butterflies. Sean seriously is good for handing Isaac the ... [snip!] ... play games with him. He sleeps in a different room for crying out loud..but don't get me started on that. Maybe another time."

Yeah I try not to air our dirty laundry at all on here or Facebook. I figure everyone has trouble no need to post mine publicly lol

Quoting Máthair Gruaig Gorm:" <blockquote><b>Quoting I'm His Amy He's My Rory:</b>" Because sometimes there's just ... [snip!] ... I guess, but it didn't sound like that in the OP. And I just held her through it. She had stomach problems for a long time."

I get both sides I really do, but even now bedtime is a fight a lot. So I'm assuming as he gets older it will be too. I don't think it'll be good for any of us to keep going round and round. I'd rather just put him to bed, and let him cry for a bit. Granted I'll check on him and comfort him from time to time but I'm not going to coddle him, if that makes sense.

<blockquote><b>Quoting GrumpsMama.:</b>" Yeah, that's exactly what I do. I guess it makes more sense in what you just said. Idk, I don't want him in my bed forever"</blockquote>




I just made it very big and exciting about how she was such a big girl to get a bed...she got a princess bedding set for her third birthday and helped paint her room. I probably could have moved her closer to two that three, but I didn't get an apartment until then.

I'm all for cio if it works for you, but it didn't sound like it is and you're not an awful person for giving in and comforting him. Maybe give yourself a time limit. Try rocking him to sleep for another 4-6 months or so, then revisit the cio. Maybe then he'll be ready to self-soothe.