So Angry and Frustrated!

I hope you're in a reading mood. I have a lot to vent!

So I miscarried abruptly back in January. I was 13+ weeks pregnant which was the very beginning of my second trimester. My mom works at an OB/GYN so after it happened, the doctor she works for had a bajillion tests done on me. Which supposedely normally wouldn't be done. But its more rare to miscarry in the second trimester.

My husband did stand by me, however he has no capacity to understand the pain I felt or feel. And it shows.

So here I am pregnant agian. Now I'm 6 weeks and I've found out that its twins. Well I was referred to a Perinatologist because of some of the blood work. There's question as to whether or not my body threw a blood clot to the umbilical cord and killed the baby during my first pregnancy. Well I never got a definite answer as to why I miscarried.

But when I went to the doctor today I was hoping for more answers and some kind of comfort! What I got was. He never does the battery of testing for people until they miscarry 3 or 4 times. 3 or 4 times????!!!! Are you serious??? I barely coped with the first one and I'm going to lose it if it happens again ... now with twins!!! But basically there's no answer so its just a waiting game. Now ... since it is twins, twins cause a higher chance for miscarriage????????? There's no relief. And when I feel helpless and frustrated about miscarrying once my husband just says ... it was just one of those things. Stop worrying about it. Don't think about it. But he passes it all off as whatever. I can't do that!!! I don't want to miscarry. I want answers and I want my babies!!!!

I want comfort and relief. I guess I feel really hormonal right now. But I feel like screaming and then crying! But he wont understand why i'm upset. Blah blah blah.

I just want to have a healthy baby, or I guess in this case babies. Just going out of my mind.

I am so sorry to hear what happened back in January! Was it your first pregnancy?
I am sure you have heard this, but many people miscarry with their first pregnancy. And then are just fine after that. I'm sure they checked your progesterone levels??
And boys just don't get it. They don't carry them, and they don't understand what your body goes through when you miscarry. Seeing it just isn't the same as physically feeling it. Maybe when you are feeling frustrated/upset/angry, etc. you can ask him just to hold you and be there for you. Not even talk, just be together. Enjoy each other and the miracle you guys get to experience together.

I am really sorry to hear what happened. I wish you the best of luck with your pregnancy and I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

sorry about your loss. I had a MC back last May... now here I am about to have one anyday! The MC was probably the most difficult thing I had gone through, and if you dont fully heal and dont have the support from your Friends and family and husband... it can be that much more difficult. I was very fortunte that everyone understood and helped me get through it!
unfortunetely MC'shappens and all you can do is pray for the best. I am sure your babies will be fine, But if you are nervous and think your doc isnt giving you the answer you want, maybe you should consider seeing another one at least to get a second opinion.... otherwise just know that your body will take care of your babies and you will be fine. May women have MC, especially with the 1st pregnancy...
good luck!