I hate you.

I hate you for every time you called me fat and ugly.
I hate you for slowly killing all the confidence I once had.
I hate you for every time you told me you loved me while you were having sex with another girl.
I hate you for calling me a bad mom.
I hate you for every time you blew of something important to me at the last minute.
I hate you for every time you accused me of cheating while you were cuddling with another girl.
I hate you for every single good memory of you implanted in my brain for life.
I hate you for wasting so much of my time.
I hate you for kicking me when I was pregnant.
I hate you for all the little comments you'd make trying to make me feel stupid.
I hate you for being a smurffy dad.
I hate you for breaking my heart repeatedly.
I hate you so smurfing much.
And most of all, I hate myself for believing you loved me. I hate myself for believing you'd change. I hate myself for actually missing your abusive, manipulating, lying self. And I hate myself for shedding so many tears for you.


Sorry, I needed to get this all out.

Be strong, hon!

It will get better, and he will be a distant memory.

Write all this down by hand and look at it any time you think about taking him back again!

Quoting Mrs. God of Thunder:" Be strong, hon! It will get better, and he will be a distant memory."

I hope so. I want to forget him so badly. I want to get to the point where the thought of him doesn't hit a soft spot, and I only think of him as my daughter's father.

I hope it happens, soon.

Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:" I hate you for every time you called me fat and ugly. I hate you for slowly killing all the confidence ... [snip!] ... abusive, manipulating, lying self. And I hate myself for shedding so many tears for you. Sorry, I needed to get this all out."

Awe Mama, this almost made me cry. I am so sorry that you have been through so much. I know how you feel in some ways. *hugs*

i'm right there with you darling. i just got out of the verbally and physically abusive relationship i was in. i feel every single sentence in your OP.

I wish I could give you a big smurfing hug. I hope you know that despite all of the smurf he's put you through, you are strong and beautiful. You are a great mother and should have no reason to think otherwise. He is soooo not worth your time girl. I know it sucks being lonely, but just remember it's for the best. I'm always here if you need to talk/vent.

Quoting Raptor Jesus (TTC):" Write all this down by hand and look at it any time you think about taking him back again!"

The smurf he's said to me today is enough. I saved the texts, so I'll have them when I start forgetting and missing him again.
Every time I read them it feels like someone's stabbing me in the stomach. It physically hurts, as well as emotionally.

Quoting Raptor Jesus (TTC):" Write all this down by hand and look at it any time you think about taking him back again!"

Not a bad idea. Thi is def something a woman should do when she is going through a breakup/divorce.

Quoting ☮Sugar Magnolia:" The smurf he's said to me today is enough. I saved the texts, so I'll have them when I start forgetting ... [snip!] ... again. Every time I read them it feels like someone's stabbing me in the stomach. It physically hurts, as well as emotionally."

Well I hope you know by now that if you ever need to talk you are more than welcome to message me.

takes time.... if we could snap our fingers we would.... stay strong at one point we've all been there (me 2 2many times i pray that this one is differnt)

Quoting MyPurrrtyBabies:" Awe Mama, this almost made me cry. I am so sorry that you have been through so much. I know how you feel in some ways. *hugs*"

Thanks you. I'll be okay.
It only hurts when LO's asleep for the night and I have a lot of time to think.  

Quoting Mrs. God of Thunder:" Be strong, hon! It will get better, and he will be a distant memory."

!!!!!!

Quoting ßitchtastic:" i'm right there with you darling. i just got out of the verbally and physically abusive relationship i was in. i feel every single sentence in your OP."

I'm sorry girl.  

The good thing is we got out, and we're both beautiful women with perfect children.
They're the ones who will regret this, not us.

Quoting Mother of Broccoli.:" I wish I could give you a big smurfing hug. I hope you know that despite all of the smurf he's put you ... [snip!] ... your time girl. I know it sucks being lonely, but just remember it's for the best. I'm always here if you need to talk/vent."

Thanks girl, love you.<3