ahhh help!

Okay, pleaasseee help. My husband, AJ's DREAM has always been to go into the army. Working on cars, so I'm not so much worried about the war and all. Anyway, the last two times on his way to basic, the cops stopped him for this case. Well, the case is over, he can go into the army as soon as the jodge signs these papers. But NOW, he is giving me every exscuse in the world like his body isn't ready, he wants to go reserves(which is a HORRIBLE idea), and everything else you can imagine. But he wants to get out of here. But active duty army has always been what hes wanted since a little boy, and I'm NOT going to let him give up his dreams because of some asshole detectives. How do I get him to go through with this? Also, he won't sit down and talk with me about it, and he knows how I feel about it.... I know he wants to do it, I just don't know why he's making exscuses, or how to make him see what's going on. And we CAN'T stay in Florida. He's been in way too much trouble, and will find himself in more if he stays, and my ex is making his life hell. =[

well he obviously been to a recuiter. so give his recruiter a call and ask for him to come talk to him. he's just getting cold feet cause it can finally happen. try the recruiter. its his job to get boots on the ground so he might be able to convince him to go thru with it.

ok i actually understand your situation somewhat personally, but one thing i found out is never EVER push someone to join the armed forces (any branch) its hard enough emotionally and physically to begin with and being pushed there will only make it worse, i know you want him to follow his dream but just be supportive and offer useful alternatives while gently telling him to not give up on his life liong dream

Well just a little word of adice... If he does join, just because he wants to work on cars doesn't mean he's not going to war. He'll probably get a job workin on Humvees or something. Most everyone gets sent, so don't think war is out of the question... I'm not trying to be rude but it's just a pretty obvious thing that happens at one point or another.

As far as getting him to follow his dreams, talk to him about why all of a sudden he doesn't want to join active. Be sure to let him know that you have faith in him that he'll be a good soldier no matter what happens regardless of all that detective stuff. Remind him that you'll be supportive of whatever he decides tho too. Whether it's reserves or active. I have a bunch of thoughts to say on this I just can't make sentences lol... Anyway, I hope things work out. GL

Yes, I know there's the biggest chance of him going to war, esp. with only enrolling for 4 years. But I'm not worried about it since he'll be working on cars, it's not like he chose infantry or something, He knows better. But I'm not trying to MAKE him go, I just want him to not be afraid. He won't sit down and talk to me, his Dad's always taught him not to show emotion, so he won't have a freaking heart to heart talk, it's sucks. I know he's afraid of getting arrested again, but he hasnt done anything. And I know he's having a son, but this is better for his son than sitting here on our asses in Florida, where we will most likely get into a lot of trouble, both of us know way too many people, and wayy too many things about them. And I can't find the damn number to that one office! It sucks, and on top of that, AJ won't answer the guys calls!

Not just infantry gets sent. Mechanics get sent as well. Somebody has to maintain the vehicles while they are over there. My husband isn't infantry and has been once for 15 months, and his unit is gearin up to go again in December.

Like someone else said. Don't force him into it, but then bring up what other options you guys have in order to get out of the bad living situation youre in. The army really isn't that bad, and the benefits are amazing. Esp with a child on the way. He probably is just getting cold feet.

*Hugs!* I totally feel you!

Ryan and I have the opposite problem though. His mom has him brainwashed to think that the military is his only option if he wants to make anything out of himself because, "the military worked for her and his father." Well, they're divorced and now she can't get a date unless it's on the internet and she's kind of a whore because she puts out too easily, but that's another story.

So, let's trade men? Ryan wants to be infantry, but I don't want him to leave me here while I'm preggo because I'll be high-risk and if I have another miscarriage, I'd die without him.

I kinda know what you mean...only with my husband it was Air Force and following in his grandpa's foot steps. It took me arguing with him every day for a month to get him to consider going to the recruiter. I think the final straw was when I sat him down and said that I did not want him to resent me or our son later in life for never following up on something he had always dreamed of. I told him he would never forgive himself, and I would never forgive myself either.

Jessica, you're getting me all wrong here. I meant there's less of a chence of him dying, so him going to war isn't scaring me like it does some people, and he WANTS TO GO. i KNOW HE'LL go TO WAR, i WAS SAYING THAT i DOUBT HE'LL BE IN THE LINE OF FIRE. Wow, sorry didn't realize I didnt turn Caps off lol.
Jenn- Wow, so sorry to hear! That sucks! AND OMG No! Infantry?? Wow. Bad. I know many people who have died because they were infantry =[
Luvin My Boys-lol. That's awesome. He has a recruiter, but the boy won't answer Sgt.'s calls. I don't understand it/ Actually, he was fine with going last week, and all of a sudden, nothing. And I tell him that every time he brings up the army. I want him to go and follow his dreams. Not to mention how wonderful it is for families. UGH!

Quoting Jessica ♥:“ Well just a little word of adice... If he does join, just because he wants to work on cars doesn't mean ... [snip!] ... or active. I have a bunch of thoughts to say on this I just can't make sentences lol... Anyway, I hope things work out. GL”

thats true i forgot to say that, he'll have a more likely chance of going to war because he works on cars. he'll be a mechanic for army vehicles and u know those are over there, he'll just be in the rear which means he will pretty much be out of harms way but he'll have more time over there than normal. he'll be in a mechanic unit and they are always beng deployed. our soldiers need their vehicles up and running at all times!

oh lol sorry. i was reading it wrong then. oops  

Quoting Mrs.Dani 30 days Left!:“ Jessica, you're getting me all wrong here. I meant there's less of a chence of him dying, so him going ... [snip!] ... every time he brings up the army. I want him to go and follow his dreams. Not to mention how wonderful it is for families. UGH!”

i'm in the army and i wouldn't call it wonderful for the family!!! lol the benifits are great but as far qualilty time u can forget it.

Quoting Jessica ♥:“ oh lol sorry. i was reading it wrong then. oops  ”

Yeah sorry about the damn caps, IDK why my keyboard doesn't like me =]

Makayla's Mom- Well, I'm sure it'd be better than him working two jobs, over 60 hours a week six days a week, and sleeping all day on his day off. And yes, benefits, getting out of here, and money is much better than anything around here! All that's here for us besides family is bad news. (We've lived here almost our whole lives)