re: how to tell your man is cheating

heres a few things...
found weird numbers in his cellphone, but has an explanation. he's been selling stuff on craigslist and its the people who he is selling his stuff to. umm then he sold both his phones...so he doesnt even have one now..we are stopping our service with tmobile, but it doesn't end til the 14th...

sex has been kinda different. he doesn't want it as often anymore. lol he says he is to tiredeven thoughim taking care of our baby usually...shouldnt i be the one who's to tired? he doesn't have a job so he can't be to tired from working...

hes been hanging out with his friend who just broke up with his gf. when i would text him while he was out, he would get mad because was "driving" almost constantly though...i never could get a definate answer as to where he went or where he was at

we've been fighting a lot lately and he keeps saying that he can't deal with me anymore, but then says sorry...

just make sure you really want to know because the truth usally hurts

also..
i should add that i have his passwords to myspace/email...
he knows i check always lol
but i found oldmessages from his ex saved in his email. i asked him why he still had them there and he said that he forgot that they were there. they've been there for 8 months now and he doesn't have a computer, but hes been at my house checking his email plently of times...

Quoting kaluvzmc:“ heres a few things... found weird numbers in his cellphone, but has an explanation. he's been selling ... [snip!] ... he was at we've been fighting a lot lately and he keeps saying that he can't deal with me anymore, but then says sorry...”

call the numbers, i did, my bf says im crazy but guess what? i found something, if theres nothing to hide they wouldnt be worried

Quoting ♥kaylees mommy:“ just make sure you really want to know because the truth usally hurts”

i've had the truth and it definately does hurt. we broke up this past summer for a while and he met this ex gf that i was talking about in the emails. he was still seeing me saying that he loved me, blah blah, but he was also seeing her at the same time behind my back. we weren't officially together at the time, but in my heart i still considered it cheating and i still do to this day.

Quoting Ms.Melody:“ call the numbers, i did, my bf says im crazy but guess what? i found something, if theres nothing to hide they wouldnt be worried”

i wish i would've called them, but now it's to late since he sold his cellphone. i guess im gonna have to start checking his house phone now. lol

Quoting ♥kaylees mommy:“ just make sure you really want to know because the truth usally hurts”

Yep-be prepared when snooping to find things you don't want to see.
And if he catches you snooping and he's innocent you're going to look like a psycho,which may drive him away.
You check his myspace?If my husband read my email and whatnot I'd have his balls in a vice!there has to be some line of privacy drawn in any relationship for it to work,In my opinion.It's like you are basically telling him that you don't trust him,and if you don't trust him then he might as well be cheating,ya know?

It sounds like good advice from everyone, I do not know if you share finances but one of the things that tipped me off about my ex husband was that he would say he was going out to dinner with a few of "the guys" and then I would see a charge for like 50$ on our account at Olive Garden, I knew him and the guys didn't hang out at Olive Garden and if so why did he only spend enough to cover dinner for him and one other person?!?!

Quoting Ms. Von Fate:“ Yep-be prepared when snooping to find things you don't want to see. And if he catches you snooping and ... [snip!] ... you are basically telling him that you don't trust him,and if you don't trust him then he might as well be cheating,ya know?”

yeah. lets just say that we do have a lot of problems in our relationship right now. i definately have trust issues and he does know that i dont trust him. im to find a way to trust him again, but how can you trust the guy when i feel like calling cheaters and hiring a private detective? i just dont know what to do. im so paranoid

Quoting Momma to Baby Z:“ It sounds like good advice from everyone, I do not know if you share finances but one of the things that ... [snip!] ... guys didn't hang out at Olive Garden and if so why did he only spend enough to cover dinner for him and one other person?!?!”

good point. one thing that gets me is how he can spend so much gas money. i know that gas is expensive, but i don't put that much in a week. he is putting gas in like 3-4 times a week. he says that his friends are putting gas in when he is driving them around, yet he never has any gas in his car! A full tank lasts him about 2 days or not even.

Quoting kaluvzmc:“ yeah. lets just say that we do have a lot of problems in our relationship right now. i definately have ... [snip!] ... you trust the guy when i feel like calling cheaters and hiring a private detective? i just dont know what to do. im so paranoid”

If you can't trust him,then maybe the relationship isn't worth saving and you need to get out before you get hurt even worse.Or just ask him point blank if he wants to see other people until you two can decide if things are going to work,I know it sucks to feel like you're just giving up,but realistically you'll be doing yourself a favor in the long run.

Well, I'm just nosey and paranoid so yep I check my hubby's Myspace all the time. He has my passwords to things and I have his, and there are several times I grab his phone right in front of him and go through it. I'm just like that. He goes through mine every now and then as well. It's just for my peace of mind honestly. In my heart I KNOW he would never cheat on me, but in my mind I'm like well what if...so yeah. But it doesn't bother him anymore. It used to, but he got over it. The longer we've been together (6 years and counting) the less I do it. I do have a bad habit though of calling him at random times during the day, although that is completely innocent b/c I'm usualyl just wanting to say hey lol. But yes, I went through his email about two years ago and found some questionable things and confronted him...he explained it, I checked his story out it checked out fine and we moved on. Be prepared for anything.

IMO ill give my passwords cell w/e ya i have guy friends but w.e he can tal to them i dont care really he knows the situation with each and knows im not interested, one time in the beginning a guy called my phone that was trying to get with me despite knowing i had a bf and my bf yelled at him and he called back apologizing to my bf im honest about it all.. little things like flirting dont need to be said but if your bf had nothing to hide he;d be more than happy to show your assumptions are wrong just like i did to gte my bf off my back

Well I let my b/f read your posts and from what you wrote, coming from a guys perspective...I hate to say it, but he sayshes probably cheating. At first he thought you were reading into it too much about the wierd numbers, since he was selling his phones, and the sex thing, it happens. If hes under any stress it could be affecting his libido...then he found out about his ex and the emails, and him seeing his ex while you were broken up and he said..."oh ya...he's cheating" I dont know what else to say, but a guys honest blunt opinion should hopefully make you see it.

he tries to tell me that I am wrong. He lets me look through his phone so I could've easily called those numbers in there. He doesn't mind if I go on his myspace or his e-mail because he rarely uses either. It's just that some things just don't make sense. I wonder if he is just a good liar and good at hiding things. I know that if he was seeing someone else while he was out with his friends, they would not tell me because THEY cheat on their gfs. It's just hard to know what's true and what isn't. I'm going to keep a good eye on him though because I want to find out the truth. I have asked him point blank, "are you cheating on me" and he kind of laughed it off and said no like I'm crazy (just might be lol)