re: Should there be a limit?

Quoting Leeeendaaaahhhh:“ Well I guess I am not a very good parent then, my teens help watch and look after my toddler and baby. ... [snip!] ... those first years. I don't know, stuff happens. Maybe some think I am a bad mom. Sorry about that. I think I do alright.”

My dad begged me to move back in when my husband went to BMT and Tech School and I did. They often "asked" to watch her and would constantly tell me "why dont you go do this we'll watch her you need to get out of the house". Thats fine but I did not "expect" them to watch her for me. I never even asked them to watch her for me they always offered. I think its fine if they ask to or if occasionally you ask but not "expect" them just to do it.

For example (this is not what is happening but what I mean by "expect") A girl back home had a baby girl. Her bf went to a friends house and wouldnt be back for a few hours which she knew. Someone asked her to go to the store with them for say 20 maybe 30 minutes. Well she left and left the baby behind without asking anyone to watch her. When she got back everyone was obviously pissed she left her kid like that and her excuse was she "expected" someone to keep a eye on her because so many adults were there.

I know a woman who has two kids and her older one is *always* stuck watching his little sister...And I mean ALL.THE.TIME...

IMO, as long as they recycle/compost and can financially take care of their kids, that's cool...I do, however have a problem w.people living off of the system who do not use birth control/control the size of their family...

I would not support limiting the number of children a woman can have...Nope...

Quoting bummalicious:“ I think as long as you can financially support all of the children, it shouldn't really matter.”

I disagree....having a family is so much more than just the money to support your kids...with that many kids how do you give each one the attention they need? And how is it fair to the older kids because they get stuck with ALOT of the responsibility of taking care of all their other brothers and sisters...

Quoting Giner Weiners:“ I don't agree with birth control and unless I have some medical reason to be on it, I won't be taking it. So if I have 20 kids it was meant to be.”

I read somewhere I believe on discovery health , that they would have as many kids as God would will them to. So I am thinking maybe they do not believe in bc ? My mom has 12 brothers and sisters, they all felt equally loved and had a very happy childhood.

Quoting Hopeful for 09:“ I read somewhere I believe on discovery health , that they would have as many kids as God would will ... [snip!] ... they do not believe in bc ? My mom has 12 brothers and sisters, they all felt equally loved and had a very happy childhood.”

In the bible it says "Be fruitful and multiply." So I can see how a hugely religious family would do just that.

Geez, I'm so late for this topic. Anyways, to the OP, NO there should NOT be a limit, for anybody for any reason.

Everyone keeps saying it isn't fair to the older kids. I don't have a bajillion kids but I have a few. I feel I have enough, but my older kids are the ones constantly hounding me to have more!!! They don't want me to be done! Just thought I'd put that out there. (btw, I don't do pregnancy well, my body just doesn't handle it well, so I truly doubt I will, stuff happens and I doubt I will stop having sex, I kinda like it, so the chance is there. BUT, I really don't want anymore pregnancies. I have considered adopting in a few years though.)

Quoting Leendah:“ Everyone keeps saying it isn't far to the older kids. I don't have a bajillion kids but I have a few. ... [snip!] ... it, so the chance is there. BUT, I really don't want anymore pregnancies. I have considered adopting in a few years though.)”

Mine do that too. They tell me that they want me to have 100 kids. I'm like "Ahhh, no honey." then they change it to "What about 10?" lol. I still don't think so. We will be having at least one more ourselves.
My 16 year old is not truely ours. Her mom leaves her at our house whenever she is tired of her (long horrible story) so I count her as one of my own. In my opinion 1 child should have been to many for her mother.

Quoting lilmrsmchenry:“ Mine do that too. They tell me that they want me to have 100 kids. I'm like "Ahhh, no honey." then ... [snip!] ... of her (long horrible story) so I count her as one of my own. In my opinion 1 child should have been to many for her mother.”

haha, I truly understand. It doesn't take a uterus to make a mom, I have learned unfortunately.

Quoting Leendah:“ Everyone keeps saying it isn't fair to the older kids. I don't have a bajillion kids but I have a few. ... [snip!] ... it, so the chance is there. BUT, I really don't want anymore pregnancies. I have considered adopting in a few years though.)”

I get what you're sayin...but 6 kids is WAYYY different than 18 or however many it is lol...I will agree that kids should DEF have responsibility, no doubt about it...and I could be wrong...but I guess since I know how busy my schedule is just with college, house chores, my husband, and only my one son.. how hard it must be with that many children! But perhaps her time managment skills are far more superior than mine lol, obviously!

Perhaps b/c I never really spent quality time with my parents, I have made a vow to myself to give that to my children and just find it would be hard with 18 lol...and it is also out of the question for me to be a SAHM so I also have that to take into acocunt.

Quoting Erica (MizAmERICA):“ I disagree....having a family is so much more than just the money to support your kids...with that many ... [snip!] ... the older kids because they get stuck with ALOT of the responsibility of taking care of all their other brothers and sisters...”

Thats what I think is so bad. I dont care if the kids want you to have more or not. Its not their child its yoursand they should not be the only taking care of their siblings. Encourage your child to have a childhood and NOT the responsibility of being a second parent to their brothers or sisters. Occasional helping out is completely different then being REQUIRED or ASSIGNEDto take care of another child. If they asked and you gave that to them then all you are encouraging is teen parenting and encouraging your child have a child. This is where all these 13 or 14 yr olds saying "I want a baby now" come from. They took care of brothers or sisters or cousins and automatically think "I can do this I want to have a baby of my own". How many times have you heard from these girls "I have taken care of babies before I can handle it"?

Quoting Erica (MizAmERICA):“ I get what you're sayin...but 6 kids is WAYYY different than 18 or however many it is lol...I will ... [snip!] ... it would be hard with 18 lol...and it is also out of the question for me to be a SAHM so I also have that to take into acocunt.”

Can I be honest? As the kids get older, it does actually get easier. You get into a routine, kids get more self-sufficient, and you get more organized.
But, like I have said numerous times, each family is different, which is why you can't jugde. There are far more families with one or two children that are being ignored and dismiss then thrown in front of video games and tv, then in the few extra large families across the world. Which is what I find so sad about this debate.

Quoting Cowgirl47429:“ Thats what I think is so bad. I dont care if the kids want you to have more or not. Its not their child ... [snip!] ... to have a baby of my own". How many times have you heard from these girls "I have taken care of babies before I can handle it"?”

Wow, that last bit was a HUGE assumption on your part. I come from a bigger family nowadays at least. My dad comes from a family of 10 kids. No one got pregnant at a young age and no one is divorced. They all have families of at least 4 kids. I know several families with more than 8 kids and very, very few....in fact I am racking my brain to try and think of one where there was a 13 or 14 year that wanted a baby, cause she thinks she can do it, cause she took care of her siblings. In fact if you look at stats, most girls get pregnant are from broken homes where mom and dad ignore them because both parents are working, the families are smaller and they are trying to feel a void. Don't you watch Maury?

Quoting Cowgirl47429:“ Thats what I think is so bad. I dont care if the kids want you to have more or not. Its not their child ... [snip!] ... to have a baby of my own". How many times have you heard from these girls "I have taken care of babies before I can handle it"?”

imo, you're backwards on this one. If teenagers take care of babies/children they actually SEE how tough it can be and it makes them want to wait to have their own children. If anything it makes them appreciate their childhood even more. Its the best form of birth control.

Quoting Leendah:“ Can I be honest? As the kids get older, it does actually get easier. You get into a routine, kids get ... [snip!] ... of video games and tv, then in the few extra large families across the world. Which is what I find so sad about this debate.”

very well said...my husband has 3 other biological brothers and sisters plus 3 more adopted ones...so there is a total of 7 and I know none of them feel neglected. It truly does depend all upon the parents and what they actually are doing with their children...if you push your one kid onto the TV or you fully interact with your 10 kids ya know?

and I can definitley see how it gets easier as they get older..I mean I'm still working on getting myself a routine because I'm a college student so my semesters are forever changing, and hopefully soon when I'm a nurse my husband and I can actually settle into a good routine...actually own a home and all that sutff lol...and of couse my son needs me so much now, but it is only getting less and less as he gets odler which is kind of sad lol...

Quoting usmcbaby!*35days*:“ imo, you're backwards on this one. If teenagers take care of babies/children they actually SEE how tough ... [snip!] ... to have their own children. If anything it makes them appreciate their childhood even more. Its the best form of birth control.”

yep my teen loves my toddler, but says that he is definitely not ready to be a daddy. He'll leave the heavy stuff to us. He thinks teens are NUTS for wanting babies, when girls even mention wanting a baby, he tells them to come a babysit Aiden for awhile....that'll show them.
He wants to play for awhile longer. He is fine with being the big brother.